Another question for only MBs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

Because they're an employee, not the child's friend.

The nanny is your employee but your child's full time caregiver. You clearly do not have either children or a nanny or your would never post something that stupid.

Some nannies are full time caregivers, some are not. You are clearly an idiot for failing to see this glaring differentiation.

I have adored all of my charges, both full and part time, but do I feel entitled, or even WANT, to go to their birthday that is either full of the parent's friends and their kids (non of whom I know...awkward small talk, yay!) or a bunch of 7-9 year olds who could care less that I am there? No. I am an adult with my own life, ESPECIALLY on the weekends. I celebrate with my charges in our own special way, and it is much more meaningful than me showing up at a party where they notice my presence for approximately 30 seconds.

If the nanny is invited, it's likely because the NF doesn't want to bruise his/her ego and she/he already seems a little unclear on boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

Because they're an employee, not the child's friend.

The nanny is your employee but your child's full time caregiver. You clearly do not have either children or a nanny or your would never post something that stupid.

Some nannies are full time caregivers, some are not. You are clearly an idiot for failing to see this glaring differentiation.

I have adored all of my charges, both full and part time, but do I feel entitled, or even WANT, to go to their birthday that is either full of the parent's friends and their kids (non of whom I know...awkward small talk, yay!) or a bunch of 7-9 year olds who could care less that I am there? No. I am an adult with my own life, ESPECIALLY on the weekends. I celebrate with my charges in our own special way, and it is much more meaningful than me showing up at a party where they notice my presence for approximately 30 seconds.

If the nanny is invited, it's likely because the NF doesn't want to bruise his/her ego and she/he already seems a little unclear on boundaries.

The majority of nannies have charges under the age of six. They are a central part of a child's life and should be invited but not compelled to attend major celebrations. I probably wouldn't care about a twelve year old's party, but I'd think the nanny would want to at least be offered the opportunity to attend a three year old's birthday celebration. And assuming you've hired well, she should be able to chat with other adults who are present...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

Because they're an employee, not the child's friend.

The nanny is your employee but your child's full time caregiver. You clearly do not have either children or a nanny or your would never post something that stupid.

Some nannies are full time caregivers, some are not. You are clearly an idiot for failing to see this glaring differentiation.

I have adored all of my charges, both full and part time, but do I feel entitled, or even WANT, to go to their birthday that is either full of the parent's friends and their kids (non of whom I know...awkward small talk, yay!) or a bunch of 7-9 year olds who could care less that I am there? No. I am an adult with my own life, ESPECIALLY on the weekends. I celebrate with my charges in our own special way, and it is much more meaningful than me showing up at a party where they notice my presence for approximately 30 seconds.

If the nanny is invited, it's likely because the NF doesn't want to bruise his/her ego and she/he already seems a little unclear on boundaries.

The majority of nannies have charges under the age of six. They are a central part of a child's life and should be invited but not compelled to attend major celebrations. I probably wouldn't care about a twelve year old's party, but I'd think the nanny would want to at least be offered the opportunity to attend a three year old's birthday celebration. And assuming you've hired well, she should be able to chat with other adults who are present...

Perfect response to the troll. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

Because they're an employee, not the child's friend.

The nanny is your employee but your child's full time caregiver. You clearly do not have either children or a nanny or your would never post something that stupid.

Some nannies are full time caregivers, some are not. You are clearly an idiot for failing to see this glaring differentiation.

I have adored all of my charges, both full and part time, but do I feel entitled, or even WANT, to go to their birthday that is either full of the parent's friends and their kids (non of whom I know...awkward small talk, yay!) or a bunch of 7-9 year olds who could care less that I am there? No. I am an adult with my own life, ESPECIALLY on the weekends. I celebrate with my charges in our own special way, and it is much more meaningful than me showing up at a party where they notice my presence for approximately 30 seconds.

If the nanny is invited, it's likely because the NF doesn't want to bruise his/her ego and she/he already seems a little unclear on boundaries.

First, OP asked for ONLY MBs to respond. Second, you need to grow up and learn that people will disagree with you. Learn to respond to that disagreement without being so disagreeable. Third, any nanny has the right to refuse to attend a party.

I feel it is very wrong and insulting to not invite my chid's nanny to a celebration of the child she care for every day, OP. As an MB who respects my child's nanny enormously, I have always invited her to any celebration that is centered on my child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

09:49 here. I guess that I make a judgement call about whether the event is appropriate to invite our nanny or not. If it is a very small and informal party with people who know each other well but don't know our nanny, and it would be awkward, then I don't invite her. It has really never been an issue.
It would be very odd and uncomfortable for me to invite my nanny to playgroup or out to dinner with my parents even if it was a birthday celebration for one of my children. Of course, when we have had big parties with 20+ people, we have also invited our nanny. Really, I think the kids would invite her even if I didn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone not invite the nanny? Somehow I just can't imagine that.

09:49 here. I guess that I make a judgement call about whether the event is appropriate to invite our nanny or not. If it is a very small and informal party with people who know each other well but don't know our nanny, and it would be awkward, then I don't invite her. It has really never been an issue.
It would be very odd and uncomfortable for me to invite my nanny to playgroup or out to dinner with my parents even if it was a birthday celebration for one of my children. Of course, when we have had big parties with 20+ people, we have also invited our nanny. Really, I think the kids would invite her even if I didn't.

Don't be silly. This thread is about parties, not your restaurant dinner with grandma.

[Anonymous]

The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

And, honestly, I have never known or heard of a parent who hasn't invited their child's nanny to the traditional birthday party.

[Anonymous]

Don't even think about NOT inviting your child's nanny to his party. Who is closer to him/her (aside from you and DH) than his nanny?

You are asking for a world of hurt and will possibly lose a good nanny over this slight. Just invite her. She will find out about it and she will (if she is any good) be hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't even think about NOT inviting your child's nanny to his party. Who is closer to him/her (aside from you and DH) than his nanny?

You are asking for a world of hurt and will possibly lose a good nanny over this slight. Just invite her. She will find out about it and she will (if she is any good) be hurt.

Exactly. The display of parental insecurity just isn't worth the needless trouble, is it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

I have a firm rule that i am NOT facebook friends with anyone I work with. It does not seem professional to me to do otherwise. To me, FB is for relatives, friends, and people I like who I otherwise wouldn't be in touch with. I am not FB friends with my nanny, and my FB profile is quite tight on security measures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

I have a firm rule that i am NOT facebook friends with anyone I work with. It does not seem professional to me to do otherwise. To me, FB is for relatives, friends, and people I like who I otherwise wouldn't be in touch with. I am not FB friends with my nanny, and my FB profile is quite tight on security measures.

What's your point? Don't invite the nanny? Do what you like and see where it gets you. GL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

I have a firm rule that i am NOT facebook friends with anyone I work with. It does not seem professional to me to do otherwise. To me, FB is for relatives, friends, and people I like who I otherwise wouldn't be in touch with. I am not FB friends with my nanny, and my FB profile is quite tight on security measures.

I am a nanny (who thankfully is never excluded from my charge's birthday parties) and I can easily access my charge's grandparents, aunts, etc to see their posted birthday party pictures of him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with not inviting our child's nanny is that, unlike other people, she will find out about the party since she works in your home. Also with social media, she will most likely see pictures of the party posted by you or one of your guests. Why create problems that you don;t need with the woman who cares for your child day in and day out and most likely loves her?

This is not your birthday party, OP - this is your child's birthday party. Yes, I feel it would be very wrong not to invite your child's nanny.

I have a firm rule that i am NOT facebook friends with anyone I work with. It does not seem professional to me to do otherwise. To me, FB is for relatives, friends, and people I like who I otherwise wouldn't be in touch with. I am not FB friends with my nanny, and my FB profile is quite tight on security measures.

I am a nanny (who thankfully is never excluded from my charge's birthday parties) and I can easily access my charge's grandparents, aunts, etc to see their posted birthday party pictures of him.

Maybe find another hobby besides stalking your employer's family on Facebook?

[Anonymous]

We invite the nanny, but she is often quite busy on the weekends.
We actually hosted a weekday bday party once so all the nanny playdate kids could come. She had fun running that and it was nice and low-key. Like one big playdate in the backyard.