Yep, I'm with Nanny Deb.
I'd hire B. A sounds like she might be great, but B is here, tested, proven in your house, enthusiastic, interested, experienced, stable and mature. As an MB I can assure that stability and knowledge of what it takes to keep a whole household on track is INVALUABLE in a nanny. Your child will presumably have multiple levels of support and therapeutic attention. If Nanny B is open to being taught the therapies you want in place then she sounds like gold to me. I would pick an experienced, mature, stable, career nanny - especially one that I've seen demonstrate enthusiasm and attention w/ my kid - over a less experienced student every single day of the week. I have to say though that your comments about her weight and diabetes don't reflect all that well on you. Just because she's overweight w/ diabetes doesn't mean she can't do the job. Just because someone is young and slim doesn't mean they're healthy. (In fact, in my experience the older generations have a vastly more reliable work ethic than younger ones.) Nor should you assume that there will be boyfriend drama w/ the younger candidate. Expect the worst and you'll get it. |
I would not be comfortable leaving a special needs non verbal 3 year old with a nanny who has diabetes and is overweight. The overweight part if relevant because of the diabetes. If she has any problems with her med your child can do nothing. Nanny B might be OK if you were working from home or if your older children will be around all the time in case of emergency. Also having a child with special needs other than the diagnosis that your child has is no qualification that she will know what to do.
Candidate A has specific education in the area that your child requires and isn't bringing along a potentially dangerous health situation. She should be motivated to do a good job, work with the therapists and key in on the cues. |
Let me guess, you're one of the 19yo nannies trying to lobby for the young and inexperienced... The key to your comments are "should." She SHOULD be motivated, she SHOULD be able to do XYZ, but NannyA is untested by any former employers and unavailable for a trial period. She is an inexperienced risk from out of town who may turn out to have no patience for children with special needs. Or she may be wonderful. But it isn't worth the risk. Also, the fact that you know nothing about the severity of Nanny B's diabetes - nor whether she is 5 pounds or 150 pounds overweight - makes your analysis of her health risks meaningless. |
No I am in my 40s and work in the health care field. Diabetes and being overweight is not a safe combination for a nanny watching a non verbal special needs child alone. Yes, this nanny needs a job but this is not the right match. |
I would go with option C - keep looking. |
1) You still don't know how managed her diabetes is nor how overweight she is so it's impossible for you to judge that. 2) You may be right that this isn't the right match (or it may be), but that doesn't by default make NannyA the right choice for the job either. Why advocate for someone that is so high-risk? |
Nanny A is the bigger risk.
OP - this board is full of overweight nannies. Whenever a question about weight pops up they all come out to go on and on about being 200 lbs doesn't make them any less fit or in shape than a nanny of normal weight. They then move on to start describing nannies of normal weight as anorexics who eat only junk food and boil puppies in their off time. |
Link please, or you're just a troll. |
Nanny here...Nanny A is too much of a risk. She has no formal nannying experience. Occasional babysitting and special needs respite care are very different than all day with young children...particularly one with special needs (coming from someone who works with a special needs child). She is also moving to the area for a guy. If the relationship goes south you may lose her if she decides to move back home.
It is very possible for an experienced nanny to be able to follow the directions/suggestions of your child's therapists. I've been in my current job for almost 4 years, and in that time I've had to communicate with, coordinate with, and incorporate directions and suggestions from 4 different types of therapists. The diabetes and overweight issues in Nanny B are a bit of a concern, but since she brought up her diabetes you could ask her for more info regarding her management of it or ask her to undergo an employment physical so her doctor can sign off on her ability to perform the required duties of the job. Daycare centers do this and there are plenty of other jobs that do as well. If these are your only options I would choose Nanny B provided a health exam checks out. If you can look into a few more candidates you might find someone more ideal without the health concerns. Good luck. |
Overweight, older mother here. I employ an even older, slightly overweight nanny. She and I get sick occasionally. We aren't as enthusiastic at the playground in August as women younger or skinnier than us.
We handle twin toddlers. We're calm, organized, patient, loving and mature. We know our limits, we know our capabilities. We know how to care for and love kids. I trust her with my children, my home, my possessions, everything in the world that is dear to me. She considers me reasonably competent to care for my kids. ![]() Those on these boards who insist on judging people's ability to care for children based on age, weight, gender, country of origin, etc... make me crazy. OP - it sounds like you have a candidate who is doing a great job w/ your kid so far, has experience w/ special needs, knows something herself about responsibly managing chronic concerns, is excited and enthusiastic about working with your child, is local and stable, and has lots of experience. Perhaps the other candidate would be great, or maybe she wouldn't, but you have a great option already working for you. A good nanny is a rare and wonderful find. Don't pass one up because of assumptions about her weight or diabetes. If she's unable to move, lift your child, get down on the floor and play? That's another story. If you can document that she is irresponsible in managing her diabetes, has frequent absences for preventable medical reasons, will be unreliable because of her diabetes, etc... then that's another story also. Otherwise she sounds great. You as the employer however? The jury is out on that one. |
The nannies advocating for nanny B don't seem to realize that this isn't about whether an overweight nanny can romp around a park or not. Its not about whether overweight should be accepted.
Managing diabetes medication and blood sugar levels is even more challenging in overweight and older patients. Blood sugar and insulin levels can seriously affect your mental capabilities, cause you to pass out, and worse. It can be scary and many people don't realize this until it happens. Its also very common for older individuals to be more in denial or simply not realize the limitations that their disease and state of health does requires. This nanny would be fine in a daycare environment as many other adults are readily available to step in if needed. The fact that she is applying for a position where she is watching a child who can't talk alone by herself and drive on a frequent basis shows a lack of judgement. There is no way that the OP should trust that she'll be lucky and nothing will happen while the nanny/child are alone. If OP isn't comfortable with nanny A she should keep looking. No way should she hire nanny B. |
The assumptions that are being made here are offensive. In a formal work environment they would also be legally actionable if hiring decisions were made based on this. |
I have relatives with diabetes and would not hire someone with diabetes to watch or drive my child. They would never put themselves in the position of watching or driving children either. Its very easy to misread the insulin to carb ratios and end up with an episode of low or high blood sugar. Low BS creates mental confusion or a drunken like state. High BS blurs your vision. Your insurance rates go up and some states put further restrictions on your driving. Its easy to miss the initial symptoms too.
Nanny B is too big a safety risk and your number one concern is ensuring the safety of your child. Nanny A also has a plus in pursuing speech pathology. This is far better than a nanny with no experience in this area learning the cues and techniques even without the safety risks. |
OP if you are providing your nanny B with a car, your car insurance may not cover her or will at least raise your rates. In most states if you experience an episode of diabetes related loss of conscious your license is suspended until you have six months clear of loss of consciousness episodes. |
+1 |