Are we getting taken advantage of?
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Anonymous
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I think you need a new nanny. Sounds like none of you are especially happy. It's ok to move on - things were great for a while but now you need a different configuration for your family and maybe she's ready for something new also.
You can work on a replacement, give her a great severance when you have someone lined up, and move on without guilt. Good luck! |
Anonymous
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Advice from a nanny - I would plan on sitting down with the nanny and having a talk. If she doesn't already fill out a log then I would ask for her to start filling out a detailed log so that you know what's going on during the day. Request that the begin doing activities with the children (going to the park, library, arts and crafts, etc). If you weren't upfront about TV privileges in the beginning then now would be the time to tell her how much TV (if any at all) the children are allowed to have during the day. Give her the chance to not use the TV so much once you let her know the rules and if she breaks those rules or lies about TV usage then let her go for lying.
I would ask that the house is at the least just as clean as it was when you left in the morning. You want all crumbs, dishes, and toys picked up. You can ask that she disinfect all of the toys on a weekly basis and help fold/put away the children's laundry. Apologize for the change in duties but let her know that at this point you are not able to offer her a raise. Be prepared for your nanny not being willing to make all of these changes for no raise. Even if she does accept the changes, she may start looking for another job and end up leaving in a week or two. I would have some potential nanny candidates lined up and ready to call in case things don't work out with your nanny. I know it's scary to think about losing your nanny but you are paying at the top of the pay range so you should not be getting bottom of the barrel services. Everything that I have listed are just general things that any average nanny should be fine with. At this point I wouldn't suggest asking your nanny to go above and beyond because she probably will never agree to it. Good luck. |
Anonymous
| Are the children attached to her at all? |
Anonymous
| Baby is only 5 months - so he's just attached to me. My three yr old seems to like her - kisses her hello and goodbye. Though there are times when I come home and he is crying, but I consider that normal 3 yr old behavior. He never complained to me about her. |
Anonymous
| Your dumb lazy nanny would enjoy the job more if she found it meaningful. I get that she is paid pretty well, to sit her arse but that doesn't mean she is really happy. Could she be depressed? Also, you just need to find a nanny that WANTS to do activities with kids, take them out to parks, museum p, play dates.AND gets involved in indoor activities, such as fun sensory stuff, painting, making felt letters, ideas from Pinterest for toddlers to learn. I think this type of nanny would feel appreciated and enjoy her job. Don't hire mother useless one. As for tv. don't throw it out, but maybe lock it via remote or make it clear to new nanny, one show in morning and one in afternoon is fine? Fire this horrid nanny, but talk with her before hand as to why you are letting her go. Also if you want a nanny/house manager then pay up! Doing laundry and taking care of kids, plus whatever else is a huge burden!!! |
Anonymous
| Any amount of tv is lazy, except for the parents who need to be doing 8 things at once. Nannies are suppose to know how to do better than that. |
Anonymous
| She should not be parking your kids in front of the TV if she is not doing housekeeping. $22/hr is high for someone who is not actively teaching and engaging your children with a great attitude. |
Anonymous
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For what you're paying, you could find a great nanny, and what you have now is an "ok" nanny. What would a live in offer that you need?
I agree with the PP -- sit down with her and tell her that your needs have changed, and she has first dibs on the job you need filled. Describe the duties, and let her decide if she wants to stay. There is no reason for you to be paying so much when you could find someone better. |
Anonymous
| I have a full-time nanny and he does errands (it's in our contract) and keeps up the kitchen, the playroom and the baby's room. He does all her laundry, including her bedding and towels. When we're going on a trip he packs and unpacks for her. I think he sometimes watches tv while she's napping, but he respects our no-screens rule for her while she's awake. Granted, we only have one and not two, but we pay $15 an hour and he does a LOT more than yours does, OP. So I'm thinking yes, you are being taken advantage of. |
Anonymous
| How old is your daughter, pp? |
Anonymous
Fail, Troublemaker. OP, you're definitely being taken advantage. Standard in DC for a new baby is $1-$2/hr above your already high rate. |
Anonymous
| I watch some TV if the younger one is napping and older is at school WHILE I do housework like fold laundry and such. It's sometimes nice to have the background noise as long as it's not too loud. The kids get to watch a half hour in the morning and half hour in the afternoon AFTER homework and such is done. I use that time to tidy up other areas or put away their laundry. |
Anonymous
Why on earth would anyone give a nanny like this a great severance package???? OP search for someone new and follow the notice period in your contract. Please do not pass her along to another unsuspecting family with a great, false reference. |
Anonymous
| OP again - thanks so much for all the input. We will sit down with her and go over our concerns and give her a chance to step up her performance. In the meantime, I will prepare myself for the nanny search - which I dread. I hope I can find a nanny like some of the ones that have posted here. I know my kids deserve better. |
Anonymous
| Good luck to you. |