Anonymous wrote:How do you know that you do have more than 30 years left? We’re all on borrowed time here. The same way you tell yourself that you won’t die in five years in your 30s/40s is the same mechanism that they’re using.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you know that you do have more than 30 years left? We’re all on borrowed time here. The same way you tell yourself that you won’t die in five years in your 30s/40s is the same mechanism that they’re using.

Yeah, but there's a difference between knowing you can die at anytime, and knowing with certainty that you don't have that much time left. Younger people just choose to assume that they will live for many more years.

Anonymous wrote:How old are you OP? Do you have kids? I started to think about this when I had kids around age 40. I also always had a sense that you get one life to live even in my 20s and I accomplished some bucket list items very early on. Tomorrow is promised to no one. It's just that as you get older and have more life experiences and know more people you realize that yes that terrible thing can happen to you (death/disability/illness/death of a close person or friend etc).

I'm 40 and yes, I've already had kids. I guess I have a hard time imagining it because I've always been so future oriented, I can't imagine what it's like to be old and realize that I probably don't even have five years left. I mean how do you deal with that? Just try not to think about it, or are people that age generally at the point where they feel ready to die because they feel like their time for being here has passed?

ddintysons wrote:

I'm 40 and yes, I've already had kids. I guess I have a hard time imagining it because I've always been so future oriented, I can't imagine what it's like to be old and realize that I probably don't even have five years left. I mean how do you deal with that? Just try not to think about it, or are people that age generally at the point where they feel ready to die because they feel like their time for being here has passed?

Do you know why you are concerned about how much time you have left? In your post, you worry about not having "five years left" and people feeling like "their time for being here has passed." Is there something you really wanted to do that you have not done? Then, do it now. Are you worried you will not live as long as someone else or others your age?
If so, why?

OP - live in the present moment, the moment happening right now, today. Enjoy it.

Worrying if you will get more tomorrows diminishes the pleasure that you can find today. Once you understand and accept that today is all we really have, then you can let go of yesterday and tomorrow and truly enjoy where you are and where you always will be.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you OP? Do you have kids? I started to think about this when I had kids around age 40. I also always had a sense that you get one life to live even in my 20s and I accomplished some bucket list items very early on. Tomorrow is promised to no one. It's just that as you get older and have more life experiences and know more people you realize that yes that terrible thing can happen to you (death/disability/illness/death of a close person or friend etc).

I'm 40 and yes, I've already had kids. I guess I have a hard time imagining it because I've always been so future oriented, I can't imagine what it's like to be old and realize that I probably don't even have five years left. I mean how do you deal with that? Just try not to think about it, or are people that age generally at the point where they feel ready to die because they feel like their time for being here has passed?

This is good advice, but really a lot of this stems out of sheer curiosity. Is this what most people do when they get old? I guess I'm just wondering what the "typical" way is for people to deal with this.

It's something that's difficult to know because no one wants to come out and tell and ask an older person, "Hey how does it feel to know you will die soon?" Unless someone volunteers the information, there's no way to find out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you OP? Do you have kids? I started to think about this when I had kids around age 40. I also always had a sense that you get one life to live even in my 20s and I accomplished some bucket list items very early on. Tomorrow is promised to no one. It's just that as you get older and have more life experiences and know more people you realize that yes that terrible thing can happen to you (death/disability/illness/death of a close person or friend etc).

I'm 40 and yes, I've already had kids. I guess I have a hard time imagining it because I've always been so future oriented, I can't imagine what it's like to be old and realize that I probably don't even have five years left. I mean how do you deal with that? Just try not to think about it, or are people that age generally at the point where they feel ready to die because they feel like their time for being here has passed?

Much the same thing as anyone, of any age, who is faced with the possibility of dying soon. The cancer patient, the children who are diagnosed with a disease or condition that has a known short life span, the people who have a condition with no known treatment or cure. Imagine being in the hospital with Covid-19 in the ICU and on a ventillator. How would you feel?

Facing one's own mortality is difficult for anyone. Old age is only one condition that makes one face that.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly? The people I've known that lived to be 90+ dealt with it by being in denial about their impending deaths. Rather than being depressed by the likelihood of dying sooner rather than later, they just didn't think about it and spent their time enjoying what was right in front of them (a nice meal, a nap, a favorite TV program, a new book, etc.).

I have seen that denial so often--even from elderly parents and other relatives who were dying from a health condition--that I have come to assume that it's hardwired into humans.