35yo guy husband works with brought 24yo woman to a wedding. Everyone gave him a hard time, why?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’m in my thirties and remember distinctly being treated poorly by “older” women when I was in my twenties. I still don’t get it - am kind to people (all people) by default. So...I dunno. Sounds like a big group of a-holes to me.


Beauty and fertility. Diminishment of either or causes older gals, especially childless older gals, to become unhinged.


Older gal here, I don’t behave that way. Most women I know do not either. The assumption is dated.


+1. I was never treated poorly by older women when I was in my 20s, all were very complimentary. The only real incident I remember was when I was a server (age 24/25) and waited on a table with a woman and two men, all of which were maybe late 20s/early 30s. They guys both complimented me and the woman told me I looked 40.
Anonymous
Josh Duhamel, 45, Wants to Find Someone "Young Enough to Have Kids" After Fergie, 44, Split

“I’m not 30 years old anymore. I’m 45. I want to have more kids in the next few years. So it’s more about finding someone young enough to have kids. I’m trying to find a girl that I can be with and have a family with.”

Josh was spotted last week in Malibu dining with a mystery woman who appeared to be in her late 20s.

https://people.com/movies/josh-duhamel-wants-to-find-someone-young-enough-to-have-kids-after-fergie-split/

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get how dating a med student is a “pragmatic” choice for a 35 yo man interested in having children.

If you’re going for the brood cow angle of dating a much younger woman, a med student doesn’t fit in the picture.


Hmmm. I'm dermatologist and my DH is 12 years older than I am. I was 29 when I had my first kid, 33 when I had my final and 3rd. I now have my own private practice at age 42.

I met my DH who is also a doctor when I was doing my residency. Lots and lots of doctors marry younger women. They are often so focused on starting their careers many wait until 40 to settle down and then naturally want a younger woman. I didn't have that luxury, and I knew I wanted to start having kids before I was out of my 20s.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Bradley Cooper, 44, and Shayk, 33, began dating in 2015 and welcomed daughter Lea De Seine in 2017.


They broke up.


Yea, and hes probably going to be dating lady gaga now who is also early 30s.

Look, I'm middle aged woman. Its no secret men like younger women. I even know pleanty of divorced or unhappily married women my age who like banging men 15 years younger than them.

You can say what you want, but facts are facts. Youth is desirable, sexy, and fresh.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’m in my thirties and remember distinctly being treated poorly by “older” women when I was in my twenties. I still don’t get it - am kind to people (all people) by default. So...I dunno. Sounds like a big group of a-holes to me.


Beauty and fertility. Diminishment of either or causes older gals, especially childless older gals, to become unhinged.


Older gal here, I don’t behave that way. Most women I know do not either. The assumption is dated.


+1. I was never treated poorly by older women when I was in my 20s, all were very complimentary. The only real incident I remember was when I was a server (age 24/25) and waited on a table with a woman and two men, all of which were maybe late 20s/early 30s. They guys both complimented me and the woman told me I looked 40.

Yes, in my 20's, every once in a while I was treated poorly by older women, who most of the time seemed to have issues, but most of them were very nice. Personally, I always treat younger women very well and don't feel threatened by them.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Josh Duhamel, 45, Wants to Find Someone "Young Enough to Have Kids" After Fergie, 44, Split

“I’m not 30 years old anymore. I’m 45. I want to have more kids in the next few years. So it’s more about finding someone young enough to have kids. I’m trying to find a girl that I can be with and have a family with.”

Josh was spotted last week in Malibu dining with a mystery woman who appeared to be in her late 20s.

https://people.com/movies/josh-duhamel-wants-to-find-someone-young-enough-to-have-kids-after-fergie-split/



I dunno, sometimes I think it's kind of selfish for men to put off having kids so late. Figure a couple years of dating until he finds someone, maybe a year or so until they get serious, then another year from the time they start trying to conceive until the kid is born- he'll be pushing 50. I don't know many 50-60 year olds who can deal with young kids, and his health will start declining rapidly while the kid is in their teens/20s/30s. That's a lot of pressure to put on a young person who is in school, starting a career, or caring for a family. Plus, children with older fathers are much more likely to have autism or ADHD.

I know several men who suddenly decided in their 40s they wanted kids, and I wish them luck, but I don't think they realize how difficult the logistics of it are at that age. Most are the sort of "perpetual bachelor" who value their freedom above all else and never wanted commitment, I just don't see how they will handle it when a child arrives and chains them down, or if God forbid their child has an intellectual disability and needs more intensive care. One of these men I know had a kid, realized kids aren't just cute accessories you show off, and had nothing to do with the child until he turned 18 and could go out partying with him.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get how dating a med student is a “pragmatic” choice for a 35 yo man interested in having children.

If you’re going for the brood cow angle of dating a much younger woman, a med student doesn’t fit in the picture.


Hmmm. I'm dermatologist and my DH is 12 years older than I am. I was 29 when I had my first kid, 33 when I had my final and 3rd. I now have my own private practice at age 42.

I met my DH who is also a doctor when I was doing my residency. Lots and lots of doctors marry younger women. They are often so focused on starting their careers many wait until 40 to settle down and then naturally want a younger woman. I didn't have that luxury, and I knew I wanted to start having kids before I was out of my 20s.

This post is just laced with pure braggadocio.
ZachF
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Everyone's marrying super late. Biology and peak fertility are myths. Sweetie, bless your heart, but this is called denial.

Men don't care how professional a woman in her 30s is; by the time they're married, they're going to run into fertility issues -- especially if the husband wants more than one child. A much safer bet is pursuing women in their mid and late 20s


Jeez, stop with the fertility bs. No guy cares about it until they’ve started actually trying. We’re not trying to produce an heir to the British throne.


Hey Siri, what's human nature.


Instincts. If you want a few healthy children, you don’t willingly choose an older female mate. Every animal knows this. If you only want one child or you’re content raising another man’s children, sure, court women in their 30s.

You mean animals ask each other’s ages before mating? Ha ha! You are a funny “gal.”


They can sniff it out. Because, you know, they are animals.
Anonymous
ZachF wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Everyone's marrying super late. Biology and peak fertility are myths. Sweetie, bless your heart, but this is called denial.

Men don't care how professional a woman in her 30s is; by the time they're married, they're going to run into fertility issues -- especially if the husband wants more than one child. A much safer bet is pursuing women in their mid and late 20s


Jeez, stop with the fertility bs. No guy cares about it until they’ve started actually trying. We’re not trying to produce an heir to the British throne.


Hey Siri, what's human nature.


Instincts. If you want a few healthy children, you don’t willingly choose an older female mate. Every animal knows this. If you only want one child or you’re content raising another man’s children, sure, court women in their 30s.

You mean animals ask each other’s ages before mating? Ha ha! You are a funny “gal.”


They can sniff it out. Because, you know, they are animals.


What? No, they can’t.

-wildlife biologist
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t get how dating a med student is a “pragmatic” choice for a 35 yo man interested in having children.

If you’re going for the brood cow angle of dating a much younger woman, a med student doesn’t fit in the picture.


Hmmm. I'm dermatologist and my DH is 12 years older than I am. I was 29 when I had my first kid, 33 when I had my final and 3rd. I now have my own private practice at age 42.

I met my DH who is also a doctor when I was doing my residency. Lots and lots of doctors marry younger women. They are often so focused on starting their careers many wait until 40 to settle down and then naturally want a younger woman. I didn't have that luxury, and I knew I wanted to start having kids before I was out of my 20s.

This post is just laced with pure braggadocio.


And identifying information. I know exactly who this is.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Men generally age at the same rate as women, but they are not enculturated to believe that about themselves.

Anyway, who cares. It was their date, unless they were rude to the couple marrying, no biggie.


+1

This is when the "friends" who are jealous of the couple start gossiping about what the woman supposedly did or did not do that night. So catty.



You know, it is possible she was a complete dolt.


It doesn’t have to be jealousy at all. I find it bizarre that everyone is assuming that she’s awesome because she’s young. She could have been a complete dick.


PP here. I have seen how grown adults can be really nasty when they feel "more deserving" than the next guy, and it is not pretty. In my 20's, I saw the older employees, who were supposed to be long time friends - and close, treat another employee, usually male, like rubbish if that guy had some hot young girlfriend. God forbid they get engaged. Not all hot young things are dolts - in the situations I have seen, the hot young things were more educated than the older (very bright, very accomplished) boyfriend. I think there is a stereotype that comes to mind seeing an older guy with a pretty younger woman - whether or not you admit it, people assume that the pretty young woman is a dolt or something less flattering. Not always true, believe it or not.

Some people hate on young women, that's all. Maybe they did not have such a great life during that period in their life - we will never know what triggers some people, but we can have a good idea based on their actions. Usually, catty people are not that way for no reason, an it is not because they are happy people, in general. The pretty young woman would be smart to stay away from people who don't support her and her fiancé - if I was pretty and young, I would.


Right, but you’re still assuming that pretty equals perfect. I know amazing brilliant gorgeous young women. I’m not saying that it’s not possible, or even common. What I’m saying is this person might’ve just not been one of those women. That other stuff is just projection. Also it’s a lot of horny lonely guys wanting to make a case for something that may not have been what was up. It’s fantasy fodder.


I am not confusing the two (beauty and perfection) personally - but I can see how jealous people might. If I was young and beautiful I would not GAF about what unsupportive supposed "friends" are saying behind my back. I know plenty of people who are shortsighted and not that bright. Example: the most common confusion I see here on DCUM is that "rich is equal to perfect". Similarly, I know that some shallow people think that beautiful people have no problems (much like they think rich people have no problems). Everyone has problems, but if you have a brain, you know that. Gossips would be much better off staying in their lane, though they hate to see other people happy, don't they?
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