In love with my married friend

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[Post New]12/08/2014 10:42
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yes, OP - make it stop.

It's not him. It's about you. You are a bad person.


I don't really agree that she is the bad person as he is probably liking the attention and returning the flirtation. But it is in your power OP to stop it. You are single he is MARRIED. You wouldn't want him even if you had him completely at this point because if he will do it with you he would do it to you. Is that what you want to be the women who became the leftovers or the #1?
[Post New]12/08/2014 10:47
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yes, OP - make it stop.

It's not him. It's about you. You are a bad person.


This.

Step 1: Grow up
Step 2: If possible, get a new job and cut off all contact with this guy.
Step 3: If this is not possible, ask to be transferred within the company if it's big enough and cut off all contact.
Step 4: If you simply must work together, stop all communication outside of professional contact. Explain to him why you are doing this and follow through.
Step 5: Grow up

My DH worked with a woman who had feelings for him. She sent a very inappropriate card to my home once and DH and I read it together and discussed how we felt bad for her and what he should do to discourage contact. Once they no longer worked together, he cut off all contact. I think the fantasy that you have built up in your mind is probably just that - a fantasy. If this guy was so attracted to you over the course of 4 years, something would have happened.

You are selling yourself short. This is a barrier and possibly a defense mechanism to you finding an appropriate relationship with someone who is actually available to you. Have more respect for yourself.
[Post New]12/08/2014 10:57
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Anonymous
What the fuck is wrong with you people out there who have no respect for committed relationships? Just saying, you don't want to come up against me. If my husband sleeps with your nasty self he won't be the only one to regret it. I would drag your reputation so low that you wouldn't be able to find another man. Back of winch!
[Post New]12/08/2014 10:59
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Anonymous
You are not a friend. You are a foe and a one who lack ethics and moral character.
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:05
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
My DH worked with a woman who had feelings for him. She sent a very inappropriate card to my home once and DH and I read it together and discussed how we felt bad for her and what he should do to discourage contact. Once they no longer worked together, he cut off all contact. I think the fantasy that you have built up in your mind is probably just that - a fantasy. If this guy was so attracted to you over the course of 4 years, something would have happened.

You are selling yourself short. This is a barrier and possibly a defense mechanism to you finding an appropriate relationship with someone who is actually available to you. Have more respect for yourself.


Well said, and props to you and your husband for having compassion but respecting boundaries.
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:05
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Anonymous
OP have you ever seen that movie "Obsessed" with Beyonce? You should watch it. Take a look at the psycho in the film (Ali Larter) That is you. You are the blond idiot trying to steal Beyonce's husband. See a therapist, or switch jobs to get him out of your mind. He is not into you as much as you think he is. You have worked this up in your head to be something its not.
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:06
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:What the fuck is wrong with you people out there who have no respect for committed relationships? Just saying, you don't want to come up against me. If my husband sleeps with your nasty self he won't be the only one to regret it. I would drag your reputation so low that you wouldn't be able to find another man. Back of winch!


LOL, this is you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAImYGpKO2Q
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:11
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Anonymous
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:15
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What the fuck is wrong with you people out there who have no respect for committed relationships? Just saying, you don't want to come up against me. If my husband sleeps with your nasty self he won't be the only one to regret it. I would drag your reputation so low that you wouldn't be able to find another man. Back of winch!


LOL, this is you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAImYGpKO2Q



LOL! NP. I LOVE THIS SCENE!!!


"Yes, I want you to know sir that you have a WHORE living in your hall! ROSSI! Janice Rossi!He's MY husband! Get your own g*ddamn man!"

With kids in tow. She was the original gangster.

[Post New]12/08/2014 11:23
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Anonymous
10:57 here. Love that scene the only difference for me is I wouldn't be ringing the bell in her private residence it would be frequent public humiliation for them both!!
REVENGE was a great movie!
[Post New]12/08/2014 11:28
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP have you ever seen that movie "Obsessed" with Beyonce? You should watch it. Take a look at the psycho in the film (Ali Larter) That is you. You are the blond idiot trying to steal Beyonce's husband. See a therapist, or switch jobs to get him out of your mind. He is not into you as much as you think he is. You have worked this up in your head to be something its not.


Actually you sound like you may turn into a "sleeping with the enemy" kind of gal.
[Post New]12/08/2014 15:25
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bobsmith
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:My co-worker is the greatest guy I've ever met, and we are strongly attracted to each other, but obviously never do anything but flirt because he is married and we respect that. For the past 4 years we have become best friends. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that - I'm really in love. I haven't felt this way in years (I'm single) and the intensity is scary. I think about him all the time. I masturbate to him regularly. I kind of stalk him and obsessively learn about his hobbies and interests. And I've been thinking of kooky things like ordering a love spell. I'm getting that obsessed with him.

Make it stop.


you need a break from him asap.
tough situation, but it sounds like it won't happen and it is a bad idea.
sorry!
[Post New]12/08/2014 15:56
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No. You are infatuated, and obsessed. If you are so "close" then why are you engaging in stalker-like behavior? Ridiculous. You may be able to get the guy to sleep with you - if he does, is that really the kind of guy you want?

I have a friend who gets obsessed with guys like this. Guys she can't have or who aren't good for her. She also happens to have Asperger's and is a late bloomer. I see this kind of distortion of reality in your case as well.

OP, have you ever had an actual relationship with anyone before?

It sounds like you may need a professional evaluation.


I'm the OP and I'm amazed at how close to the mark you are. I do have Asperger's and I tend to like unavailable guys. I have been in only one relationship, but that was 7 years ago and it last for about -7 months.
[Post New]12/08/2014 16:44
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Anonymous
Man, this thread devolved quickly. I have a hunch that op is a troll, but I'll bite...

You are in love. He may be, too. But he's on the winning side of this - he has the stability of marriage and the fun of flirtation. You're losing: you are wasting precious time being involved with this guy as (a) you two will never be together and (b) you're too emotionally wrapped up to abut ally date.

Cut it off. Get another job and lose his number, email, fax, whatever. It will be difficult, but it has to be done.
[Post New]12/08/2014 16:46
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Anonymous
Op tell him you had a dream of sitting on his face.
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