How would I do on the dating market?

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[Post New]07/26/2014 20:55
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Anonymous
Just based on personal experience dating for quite awhile in the DC area here is what I learned. Once you get into your mid-to late thirties the men seem to dry up, and fast. There are still some out there, so no reason to give up hope, it's just far fewer to choose from. When I dated in DC in my 20's I practically had to fight them off. Once I got in my 30's I was no longer desired the same way even though I looked pretty much the same. I didn't date with kids, it's hard to say if that will help or hurt. Being pretty of course helps, thin helps, bubbly and optimistic helps--but not too career-oriented or too smart. That seems to hurt.
[Post New]07/26/2014 21:11
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Anonymous
You didn't look the same in your 30's as in your 20's.

OP 's best target is divorced guys in early to mid 40s.
[Post New]07/27/2014 08:55
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You didn't look the same in your 30's as in your 20's.

OP 's best target is divorced guys in early to mid 40s.


Some people look better in their 30's than they did in their 20s. I am not one of them so I have no dog in this fight, but I have friends who have gotten better with age, or still look fantastic - even I to their forties. Can't tell from FB pics if they've had any "help".
[Post New]07/27/2014 08:58
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Anonymous
Try online dating -- I think you'll be fine if you are not looking for husband #2. There are plenty of great guys out there that behave like gentleman and are smart and funny. They won't necessarily be as well educated or as successful as you. I also dumped a well-educated, successful man that was really an ass. Although I haven't met anyone that I could see marrying, I am meeting plenty of great guys and having fun. My kids are preteens and teens, so that makes it a little easier.
[Post New]07/27/2014 12:53
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DanielG
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Anonymous wrote:36yo divorced mom with shared custody of 2 kids. Petite and slim (5'4" 120 lbs). Well educated. Enjoys travel.


You should be just fine given you have a good personality and aren't overly picky.

I'm a single father around your age and the online dating thing hasn't provided me many good results. Too many picky people and I feel like I'm on a job interview when talking with them online.

Good Luck
[Post New]07/27/2014 13:21
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Anonymous
DanielG wrote:
Anonymous wrote:36yo divorced mom with shared custody of 2 kids. Petite and slim (5'4" 120 lbs). Well educated. Enjoys travel.


You should be just fine given you have a good personality and aren't overly picky.

I'm a single father around your age and the online dating thing hasn't provided me many good results. Too many picky people and I feel like I'm on a job interview when talking with them online.

Good Luck


Online dating sucks for men. Try cultural events.
[Post New]07/27/2014 14:34
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, your description sounds great so far, but it is very broad in general.

You would need to be more specific.

What do you do for a living? What are your hobbies & interests? Religion? Political views?

Do you see yourself getting married again? Are you open to the idea of having more children? If so, how many?

What are YOU looking for in a life partner?


I work in business. Grew up Christian. Most of my spare time revolves around my kids - sports, music, science, pool, etc. I know that may sound lame but it is simply the truth. I am a very involved parent and my kids do mean the world to me. In an ideal world, I could find a guy who also has kids and we could hang out together and our kids could be friends. Wishful thinking, I know. I am not looking for a Brady Bunch scenario but I do think a father would understand me better. I'm not sure how much I would have in common with a single never married non-parent.

I'm not much of a cook but enjoy going out to try new restaurants. Love the beach and boating. Trying to reinvent myself and not have my entire identity be about being a mom.


Find some hobbies outside of kids and you will do fine.
[Post New]07/27/2014 16:00
quote
DanielG
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:
DanielG wrote:
Anonymous wrote:36yo divorced mom with shared custody of 2 kids. Petite and slim (5'4" 120 lbs). Well educated. Enjoys travel.


You should be just fine given you have a good personality and aren't overly picky.

I'm a single father around your age and the online dating thing hasn't provided me many good results. Too many picky people and I feel like I'm on a job interview when talking with them online.

Good Luck


Online dating sucks for men. Try cultural events.


That is what I've been doing lately.
[Post New]07/27/2014 16:40
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Try online dating -- I think you'll be fine if you are not looking for husband #2. There are plenty of great guys out there that behave like gentleman and are smart and funny. They won't necessarily be as well educated or as successful as you. I also dumped a well-educated, successful man that was really an ass. Although I haven't met anyone that I could see marrying, I am meeting plenty of great guys and having fun. My kids are preteens and teens, so that makes it a little easier.


OP here. I don't want to put my picture up on an online dating website. I feel like no one is interested in me online since I have no picture. At the same time, I am only looking at profiles with pictures with no luck. I also am not the type to ask guys out on dates. It is like a circular reference.
[Post New]07/27/2014 16:47
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Anonymous
Smithsonian Associates.
[Post New]07/27/2014 16:57
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Try online dating -- I think you'll be fine if you are not looking for husband #2. There are plenty of great guys out there that behave like gentleman and are smart and funny. They won't necessarily be as well educated or as successful as you. I also dumped a well-educated, successful man that was really an ass. Although I haven't met anyone that I could see marrying, I am meeting plenty of great guys and having fun. My kids are preteens and teens, so that makes it a little easier.


OP here. I don't want to put my picture up on an online dating website. I feel like no one is interested in me online since I have no picture. At the same time, I am only looking at profiles with pictures with no luck. I also am not the type to ask guys out on dates. It is like a circular reference.


Maybe you're not ready. Not posting a pic doesn't make any sense and you know it. Men are visual (you know this too). You don't have any hobbies outside of your kids and you're not ready to pursue any new ones. Sounds like a lot of excuses.
[Post New]07/27/2014 17:36
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Try online dating -- I think you'll be fine if you are not looking for husband #2. There are plenty of great guys out there that behave like gentleman and are smart and funny. They won't necessarily be as well educated or as successful as you. I also dumped a well-educated, successful man that was really an ass. Although I haven't met anyone that I could see marrying, I am meeting plenty of great guys and having fun. My kids are preteens and teens, so that makes it a little easier.


OP here. I don't want to put my picture up on an online dating website. I feel like no one is interested in me online since I have no picture. At the same time, I am only looking at profiles with pictures with no luck. I also am not the type to ask guys out on dates. It is like a circular reference.


Maybe you're not ready. Not posting a pic doesn't make any sense and you know it. Men are visual (you know this too). You don't have any hobbies outside of your kids and you're not ready to pursue any new ones. Sounds like a lot of excuses.


First off I think op sounds great and i would date her without needing to see a pic. What's the harm in having drinks or coffee with a nice, educated person? Even if there aren't sparks it can be a nice time and possibly worth doing again.

Second why would she want to put her photo on an online dating site? So she can wade through 1000 messages from superficial jackasses who don't even scan her profile? Talk about a waste of time. Online dating is a joke. Not that people can't be found there, but its not what she is looking for. And that's fine.

I would recommend becoming an active part of a community like this and getting to know some of the people. Trade pics with someone u find interesting and go from there. I don't see what her being immersed in her kids or not listing a bunch of hobbies has to do with anything. Find someone interesting meet face to face and see if u click. This impersonal world we live Is ruining our ability and desire to communicate with people. It's a shame.

GL
[Post New]07/27/2014 18:01
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Try online dating -- I think you'll be fine if you are not looking for husband #2. There are plenty of great guys out there that behave like gentleman and are smart and funny. They won't necessarily be as well educated or as successful as you. I also dumped a well-educated, successful man that was really an ass. Although I haven't met anyone that I could see marrying, I am meeting plenty of great guys and having fun. My kids are preteens and teens, so that makes it a little easier.


OP here. I don't want to put my picture up on an online dating website. I feel like no one is interested in me online since I have no picture. At the same time, I am only looking at profiles with pictures with no luck. I also am not the type to ask guys out on dates. It is like a circular reference.


Maybe you're not ready. Not posting a pic doesn't make any sense and you know it. Men are visual (you know this too). You don't have any hobbies outside of your kids and you're not ready to pursue any new ones. Sounds like a lot of excuses.


I'm not sure if you have children but they take up a lot of time. I have a very long list of activities I used to do before I had children. I can pretend like I still do them but that would not be entirely true. I am trained in classical music on piano, violin and flute. I enjoy concerts and theater. These days I watch movies on Netflix and mostly watch and listen to the news. I am a political junkie and work in business so I need to keep up with the market. I love water - tubing, jet skiing, parasailing, speedboats, sailboats, etc. Also was getting into snowboarding before I had kids. My favorite pastime is travel. I have been to ~40 different countries so far and have so many other places I would like to visit. I appreciate both culture and architecture.

I don't know if exercise is counted as a hobby but I do yoga, pilates, kickboxing and dance fitness.

I can paint myself well if I wanted but I would not want a guy who liked me because of my previous jet setting life. My current life is the kids, dinners out, maybe an occasional movie.

I probably wouldn't want to date me if I were a single guy. I am not insecure. I'm just old enough to know not to try being something I am not.

I would like an attractive divorced dad who can have fun, have casual sex but almost play soccer team acquaintances when the kids are around. I am not looking to become a stepmother nor do I want another dad for my kids. However, my kids are sweet and I wouldn't want someone who would hate when the kids were around.
[Post New]07/27/2014 18:09
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Anonymous
What do you look like and how old are your kids ?

Those two things will determine a lot. Toddlers vs older kids , etc.
[Post New]07/27/2014 18:17
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:What do you look like and how old are your kids ?

Those two things will determine a lot. Toddlers vs older kids , etc.


Kids are in early elementary. Without sounding too full of myself, I had a lot of guys interested in me throughout my life until I had kids. Guys always told me I was a good mix of looks and brains. I'm not going to kid myself and say I look as good as I did in my 20's but I am told I aged well. I'm 36 though, not 50. I'm a petite, thin brunette. I look very JCrew.
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