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Not wanting to share baby's name yet...is this rude?
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Anonymous
| You don't have to share anything. We shared nothing: not gender, not names, not due date. And to anyone who was PG before all the ultrasound bit: they had nothing to share either, unless it was boy name #1 and girl name #1. I reminded my dad about that, when he wanted for no reason to know the date/gender/name: you didn't share and your parents were okay w/ that. To me it's not sharing: it's nosy. Why not ask how/when/where we conceived? |
Anonymous
| i wouldn't and didn't. opinions are like a$$holes and everyone seems to have one especially on baby names. i will also never understand people that announce names super early on too. i mean anything can happen and it did to me - im just happy we sat on all of the details so it didnt make it that much harder. |
cuzimawesome
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Huh. People can do what they want but.... it's a fucking name. What's the big deal if people know what you're gonna name your kid? Seriously. Everybody new my kids names before hand and yes... I could tell that some people didn't like the names I chose... but whatever. It doesn't bother me. Gah! I just find it incredibly smug.
I really really don't care what you name your kid. So I think it's fucking hilarious when parents get all secretive about it. |
Anonymous
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We didn't tell anyone - we had both male and female names since we didn't know the sex either. We just made up horrible names to point out to people - that we werent telling so that when we names our kid Oscar Allastaire iii that the grandparents would be so distracted by the Baby! That they wouldn't tell us how much they hated the name. No one pushed, we didn't crack, and i still haven't shared our other-sex name since I want to
Save it. |
Anonymous
I honestly don't get why this would be smug. Can you say more to help me understand it? We didn't tell but I assumed that other people didn't really care and were only asking to have something to say. |
Anonymous
I don't like it when other people tell me their name before the baby is born. And I'm not alone on this. It's like people telling me they are pregnant when they are only a few weeks along. It makes me nervous. But I respect their right to do it. |
Anonymous
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We didn't share for #1, either. I used a combination of the PP's "don't want to jinx" excuse and said we wanted to make sure the name we were thinking of actually fit our daughter when we saw her. We had a made-up name we used when we referred to her before her birth (which was so outlandish everyone knew it wasn't the real name, and which we told people was the name we would call her until she was born and she got her "real" name).
With #2, we told, mostly because we thought it would help #1 anticipate her arrival, and we didn't think a 2 year old would be able to sort out pre-birth and post-birth names very easily. Note that this was for our own reasons. We would not have put up with anyone insisting they had a right to know. GL to OP! |
Anonymous
I agree. It also appears a bit smug to me. "We know the secret but we're not telling anyone". That's ok if that's what you want to do and I understand those who have had miscarriages etc having issues with it. But, really, if its just about wanting to have a "secret" about your baby that no one else knows, it seems a little childish. Not necessarily rude but I always roll my eyes when people refuse to tell. As a previous PP said, its just something people ask when they see a pregnant woman (like when you are due, what you are having, etc.). They don't REALLY care all that much and most people will forget the moment you tell them. Now, this is not the case for family or close friends but why would you not want to tell your family and friends about something so exciting? Makes no sense to me. Now, if you aren't 100% sure, that's fine. Some people really don't have the name picked out so fine. But if you are 100% sure of a name, why does it matter what someone else says about the name? Lots of people probably didn't like our name but so what? I did and I don't really care what others thought. And PPs are right--those who are rude enough to offer comments beforehand are rude enough to offer comments after the baby is born. So I just don't buy this reasoning--pick a name and own it. My sister played the "we aren't telling" game and once the baby was born, people didn't care anymore about the name because they were so sick of her BS. |