Nurse-in at Hirshhorn on 2/12 from 10-12

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[Post New]02/06/2011 23:25
TheWife
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:
TheWife wrote:
Jennifer (aka "The Wife")

(Who just made an "all about me" post, since it is responsive to direct comments about me, and not specifically related to the nurse-in. Oh well. Such is life.)


You do realize this is getting really tedious? And that you are turning off supporters of the nurse-in? What are you trying to accomplish?


You know what? You're right. This is getting tedious. Anyone with any semblance of brain power who stumbles across this forum will see a group of women, hiding behind anonymity, taking every opportunity to criticize and attack someone (or any number of people) with a differing opinion. They will see women, who claim to be in support of breastfeeding and breastfeeding mothers, use such an environment to give voice to statements that they would, with their real name, in "real life," never feel comfortable airing because of their... at best inflammatory nature. Which is somewhat sad, actually. Because, you see, I feel confident enough in myself and my opinions to voice them as myself. But that is really beside the point.

I've been nothing but respectful here (well, perhaps except for that "widdle feewings" comment, but I am, after all, only human), and I have reasonably and fully explained my position and my intent. Aside from a few bizarre, half-illiterate rantings of undetermined intent, most people have merely used this opportunity to complain. Nothing constructive seems to have been achieved, and certainly those in support of breastfeeding rights and who support nursing mothers are not going to change their minds. So... I've said my piece. My opinion and beliefs are out there. At the risk of being self-aggrandizing, I have provided a voice of reason. Since I have not hidden behind an anonymous face, anyone who would like to speak with me about this can easily find me. And anyone who would like to continue this discussion may contact me to do so, publicly or privately.

In the meantime? I have a headache. I'm tired. I've spent the day caring for my children and doing chores, on top of getting very little sleep since I am a chronic insomniac. And I have a busy and important week ahead of me. So, hey: you win. I'm calling it, literally and figuratively, a day. And if that appears to be a "flounce," well, sadly I can't help that, and I can live with it either way.

Jennifer (aka "The Wife")
[Post New]02/06/2011 23:42
Anonymous
Bye!
[Post New]02/07/2011 00:47
Anonymous
I still can't understand why people get so bothered by women feeding their children.

How hard is to look away from that bench/corner/metro seat?

Do you stare at random people or just at women feeding their babies?
[Post New]02/07/2011 11:00
Anonymous
TheWife wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
TheWife wrote:
Jennifer (aka "The Wife")

(Who just made an "all about me" post, since it is responsive to direct comments about me, and not specifically related to the nurse-in. Oh well. Such is life.)


You do realize this is getting really tedious? And that you are turning off supporters of the nurse-in? What are you trying to accomplish?


You know what? You're right. This is getting tedious. Anyone with any semblance of brain power who stumbles across this forum will see a group of women, hiding behind anonymity, taking every opportunity to criticize and attack someone (or any number of people) with a differing opinion. They will see women, who claim to be in support of breastfeeding and breastfeeding mothers, use such an environment to give voice to statements that they would, with their real name, in "real life," never feel comfortable airing because of their... at best inflammatory nature. Which is somewhat sad, actually. Because, you see, I feel confident enough in myself and my opinions to voice them as myself. But that is really beside the point.

I've been nothing but respectful here (well, perhaps except for that "widdle feewings" comment, but I am, after all, only human), and I have reasonably and fully explained my position and my intent. Aside from a few bizarre, half-illiterate rantings of undetermined intent, most people have merely used this opportunity to complain. Nothing constructive seems to have been achieved, and certainly those in support of breastfeeding rights and who support nursing mothers are not going to change their minds. So... I've said my piece. My opinion and beliefs are out there. At the risk of being self-aggrandizing, I have provided a voice of reason. Since I have not hidden behind an anonymous face, anyone who would like to speak with me about this can easily find me. And anyone who would like to continue this discussion may contact me to do so, publicly or privately.

In the meantime? I have a headache. I'm tired. I've spent the day caring for my children and doing chores, on top of getting very little sleep since I am a chronic insomniac. And I have a busy and important week ahead of me. So, hey: you win. I'm calling it, literally and figuratively, a day. And if that appears to be a "flounce," well, sadly I can't help that, and I can live with it either way.

Jennifer (aka "The Wife")


Do you ever just shut up? Please try it, now.
[Post New]02/07/2011 11:03
Anonymous
TheWife wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don't think anyone is against breast feeding in public, just cover up. This is so simple but after reading many posts, with the exception of Jennifer's rants, too many want a confrontation and this is not helping your cause. Martin Luther King and Ghandi succeeded because they were "peaceful."

Ladies, as has been pointed out several times, you are hurting your cause if you proceed with this proposed demonstration.


Sorry, I meant that Jennifer's rants are book length and haven't read them word-for-word. She has been vociferous in extolling the virtues of confrontatio.


Ah, so glad you've been able to discern my intent, meaning, and purpose without actually reading my posts. How... omniscient of you.

Jennifer (aka "The Wife")


I've read enough to know that I don't want to read any more of your diatribes.
[Post New]02/07/2011 18:46
Anonymous
Well, I for one am sorry to see Jennifer go but I totally get why. Arguing here is fruitless. Some people will never be convinced that it is not their right to inconvenience a BFing woman because of their "emotional sensibilities". However, even more depressing is the fact that more than one poster (or maybe not) was arguing simply for the sake of argument. No matter how Jennifer strove to take the high road, the sewer rats kept creeping up behind her. So I totally get why she decided to quit wasting her time here and focus her efforts in more constructive manner-organizing and supporting the nurse-in and refusing to give up standing up for a worthy cause just because of a few nuts on the internet. Kudos to you Jennifer. If anyone here is familiar with Adequate Parent, then they might also have read the quote that follows her posts. Pretty much sums it up in this case.
[Post New]02/07/2011 19:22
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Well, I for one am sorry to see Jennifer go but I totally get why. Arguing here is fruitless. Some people will never be convinced that it is not their right to inconvenience a BFing woman because of their "emotional sensibilities". However, even more depressing is the fact that more than one poster (or maybe not) was arguing simply for the sake of argument. No matter how Jennifer strove to take the high road, the sewer rats kept creeping up behind her. So I totally get why she decided to quit wasting her time here and focus her efforts in more constructive manner-organizing and supporting the nurse-in and refusing to give up standing up for a worthy cause just because of a few nuts on the internet. Kudos to you Jennifer. If anyone here is familiar with Adequate Parent, then they might also have read the quote that follows her posts. Pretty much sums it up in this case.


Well if this ain't the pot calling the kettle black.

I resented her (and others') use of racism to bolster their arguments. Just because it is a nurse-in doesn't make it like fighting racism. If we organized a pro-discretion sit-in, would we be able to use the same arguments? How simple that would be.

I would honestly like to know in what countries it is socially acceptable to nurse without being discreet. Are we talking third world countries? Or where?
[Post New]02/07/2011 22:43
Anonymous
TheWife wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
TheWife wrote:
Jennifer (aka "The Wife")

(Who just made an "all about me" post, since it is responsive to direct comments about me, and not specifically related to the nurse-in. Oh well. Such is life.)


You do realize this is getting really tedious? And that you are turning off supporters of the nurse-in? What are you trying to accomplish?


You know what? You're right. This is getting tedious. Anyone with any semblance of brain power who stumbles across this forum will see a group of women, hiding behind anonymity, taking every opportunity to criticize and attack someone (or any number of people) with a differing opinion. They will see women, who claim to be in support of breastfeeding and breastfeeding mothers, use such an environment to give voice to statements that they would, with their real name, in "real life," never feel comfortable airing because of their... at best inflammatory nature. Which is somewhat sad, actually. Because, you see, I feel confident enough in myself and my opinions to voice them as myself. But that is really beside the point.

I've been nothing but respectful here (well, perhaps except for that "widdle feewings" comment, but I am, after all, only human), and I have reasonably and fully explained my position and my intent. Aside from a few bizarre, half-illiterate rantings of undetermined intent, most people have merely used this opportunity to complain. Nothing constructive seems to have been achieved, and certainly those in support of breastfeeding rights and who support nursing mothers are not going to change their minds. So... I've said my piece. My opinion and beliefs are out there. At the risk of being self-aggrandizing, I have provided a voice of reason. Since I have not hidden behind an anonymous face, anyone who would like to speak with me about this can easily find me. And anyone who would like to continue this discussion may contact me to do so, publicly or privately.

In the meantime? I have a headache. I'm tired. I've spent the day caring for my children and doing chores, on top of getting very little sleep since I am a chronic insomniac. And I have a busy and important week ahead of me. So, hey: you win. I'm calling it, literally and figuratively, a day. And if that appears to be a "flounce," well, sadly I can't help that, and I can live with it either way.

Jennifer (aka "The Wife")


I suspect that Jennifer is sockpuppeting the posts praising hers, but whatever. Thing is, I am planning to be at the nurse-in. I agree with her. But I can't handle this kind of obnoxious grandstanding. Just say what you need to say (the first post was great and pretty much covered it) and then take the high road. Sitting here and having a pissing match with the crazies does absolutely nothing. I was serious when I said "what do you want to accomplish." I can't be the only other "lactivist" on this thread that you've turned off. And while I'm posting here anonymously, I'll be glad to introduce myself and tell you (gently, this is not a threat) who I am at the event. I believe what you are doing here, with this extended debate, is trying to showcase yourself and not your cause. And it hurts the rest of us who just want to be able to nurse anywhere and anyhow. BTW, I am the poster from before who said I would be at the nurse-in because I was always the person who disliked nursing in public because of being self-conscious. I am an ardent supporter of a woman's right to nurse whenever, wherever, however. But I still would love for you to kindly shut the heck up. You're a turn-off to the cause, seriously.

[Post New]02/07/2011 23:02
Anonymous

Well if this ain't the pot calling the kettle black.

I resented her (and others') use of racism to bolster their arguments. Just because it is a nurse-in doesn't make it like fighting racism. If we organized a pro-discretion sit-in, would we be able to use the same arguments? How simple that would be.

I would honestly like to know in what countries it is socially acceptable to nurse without being discreet. Are we talking third world countries? Or where?

Here is the problem: who gets to define "discreet?" When many people say "discreet" what they really mean isn't, "I don't want to see your breast," but rather, "I don't want to know you are breastfeeding." Breastfeeding in public spaces is legal and we have to leave it up to individual women to use their own judgement about how to go about doing it. Most women breastfeeding in public ARE NOT exhibitionists and don't want to show you their breasts. Most women. The problem is, while you may not be able to see their breasts, you may be able to tell they are nursing, and this is the real problem for most people. Do you suggest some course of action be required of women? Blanket over baby? How big? Have you ever tried to nurse a post four month old baby with a blanket over their head? What does that accomplish, exactly? No one will know what they are doing?

The reality is that breastfeeding in public is legal because it should be; it should not be illegal for women to feed their babies out in the open (does anyone here believe it should be illegal? that women should actually be punished for doing so, for breaking the law?). There is no constructive way to restrict that right. Most women will feed thier babies in such a way that they will not expose their breasts to you at all. That there may be a few outliers is just a part of life. It just is. Consider it the price you pay to live in a free country that doesn't punish women for being women the way it once did. Oh yeah, and just because I can't resist...just grow up. You aren't going to grow a third eye, your children won't become criminals, and your husband isn't going to leave you if you see a little skin once in a great while.
[Post New]02/07/2011 23:58
Anonymous
We have some really long winded posters here!!!!
[Post New]02/08/2011 19:49
Anonymous
I BFed my DD for over a year, in lots of different places--admittedly not the Hirshhorn but in other museums, restaurants, park benches, etc. I didn't use a nursing cover but I did use a scarf or position my shirt in such a way as to keep most of my boob out of sight. I got a few sidelong glances once in a while but that was it. I just don't think the general public cares about your breasts nearly as much as many of you would like to imagine. I honestly think that many of the women who are so militantly into stuff like this "nurse-in" actually are seeking MORE attention, rather than less. It is hard to be a new mom and feel frumpy and like nobody looks at you anymore, believe me I know. But this is a stupid way to get attention.
[Post New]02/08/2011 20:23
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Well if this ain't the pot calling the kettle black.

I resented her (and others') use of racism to bolster their arguments. Just because it is a nurse-in doesn't make it like fighting racism. If we organized a pro-discretion sit-in, would we be able to use the same arguments? How simple that would be.

I would honestly like to know in what countries it is socially acceptable to nurse without being discreet. Are we talking third world countries? Or where?


Here is the problem: who gets to define "discreet?" When many people say "discreet" what they really mean isn't, "I don't want to see your breast," but rather, "I don't want to know you are breastfeeding." Breastfeeding in public spaces is legal and we have to leave it up to individual women to use their own judgement about how to go about doing it. Most women breastfeeding in public ARE NOT exhibitionists and don't want to show you their breasts. Most women. The problem is, while you may not be able to see their breasts, you may be able to tell they are nursing, and this is the real problem for most people. Do you suggest some course of action be required of women? Blanket over baby? How big? Have you ever tried to nurse a post four month old baby with a blanket over their head? What does that accomplish, exactly? No one will know what they are doing?

The reality is that breastfeeding in public is legal because it should be; it should not be illegal for women to feed their babies out in the open (does anyone here believe it should be illegal? that women should actually be punished for doing so, for breaking the law?). There is no constructive way to restrict that right. Most women will feed thier babies in such a way that they will not expose their breasts to you at all. That there may be a few outliers is just a part of life. It just is. Consider it the price you pay to live in a free country that doesn't punish women for being women the way it once did. Oh yeah, and just because I can't resist...just grow up. You aren't going to grow a third eye, your children won't become criminals, and your husband isn't going to leave you if you see a little skin once in a great while.

You -- or others on this thread who keep posting this -- are determined to say that when anyone thinks breastfeeding in public should be done discreetly, it is code for not wanting to see anyone in public breastfeeding. That is not correct no matter how many times you turn it around. As soon as you start arguing against that, I turn you off, because that is not my position so I couldn't care less about it.
[Post New]02/08/2011 20:26
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I BFed my DD for over a year, in lots of different places--admittedly not the Hirshhorn but in other museums, restaurants, park benches, etc. I didn't use a nursing cover but I did use a scarf or position my shirt in such a way as to keep most of my boob out of sight. I got a few sidelong glances once in a while but that was it. I just don't think the general public cares about your breasts nearly as much as many of you would like to imagine. I honestly think that many of the women who are so militantly into stuff like this "nurse-in" actually are seeking MORE attention, rather than less. It is hard to be a new mom and feel frumpy and like nobody looks at you anymore, believe me I know. But this is a stupid way to get attention.


Thank you. It's really not that hard.
[Post New]02/08/2011 20:30
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I BFed my DD for over a year, in lots of different places--admittedly not the Hirshhorn but in other museums, restaurants, park benches, etc. I didn't use a nursing cover but I did use a scarf or position my shirt in such a way as to keep most of my boob out of sight. I got a few sidelong glances once in a while but that was it. I just don't think the general public cares about your breasts nearly as much as many of you would like to imagine. I honestly think that many of the women who are so militantly into stuff like this "nurse-in" actually are seeking MORE attention, rather than less. It is hard to be a new mom and feel frumpy and like nobody looks at you anymore, believe me I know. But this is a stupid way to get attention.


You don't seem to understand that many of the people calling for discrete nursing do not consider what you just mentioned to be discrete. They want you either covered with a nursing cover or in the restroom.
[Post New]02/08/2011 21:08
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I BFed my DD for over a year, in lots of different places--admittedly not the Hirshhorn but in other museums, restaurants, park benches, etc. I didn't use a nursing cover but I did use a scarf or position my shirt in such a way as to keep most of my boob out of sight. I got a few sidelong glances once in a while but that was it. I just don't think the general public cares about your breasts nearly as much as many of you would like to imagine. I honestly think that many of the women who are so militantly into stuff like this "nurse-in" actually are seeking MORE attention, rather than less. It is hard to be a new mom and feel frumpy and like nobody looks at you anymore, believe me I know. But this is a stupid way to get attention.


You don't seem to understand that many of the people calling for discrete nursing do not consider what you just mentioned to be discrete. They want you either covered with a nursing cover or in the restroom.


You don't seem to understand my point. Regardless of what people say on here, in REAL LIFE I didn't use a cover or hide out in the restroom and I never had anyone give me a problem. I just can't get that inflamed by a bunch of anonymous posters when my own experience was pretty uneventful. Some people just look for the drama, and of course they will find it.
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