Yes, all we have to do with our disabled children is calibrate a different course selection. Or maybe they will do Tae Kwon Do instead of soccer. Thats all there is to it!

You really have no idea. And I don't see how Chinese mom recognizes considering how abusive she got with her daughter who refused to practice violin. Losing your temper is control of your behavior is not "calibration."

But then again, parenting is not about tinkering with machinery. Except maybe if your the author of this piece.

The author's sister has Downs. She is a Special Olympics gold medalist in swimming per Wikipedia.

Her youngest has rebeled, and is playing more tennis than violin.

Her oldest came in second in a recent music competition. She's a senior. I am burning to know if she got accepted to her first choice school early decision! What if she was deferred!

have lost my temper, of course. But I've never done anything like this:

Then I hauled Lulu's dollhouse to the car and told her I'd donate it to the Salvation Army piece by piece if she didn't have "The Little White Donkey" perfect by the next day. When Lulu said, "I thought you were going to the Salvation Army, why are you still here?" I threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, no Christmas or Hanukkah presents, no birthday parties for two, three, four years. When she still kept playing it wrong, I told her she was purposely working herself into a frenzy because she was secretly afraid she couldn't do it. I told her to stop being lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic.

Anonymous wrote:

have lost my temper, of course. But I've never done anything like this:

Then I hauled Lulu's dollhouse to the car and told her I'd donate it to the Salvation Army piece by piece if she didn't have "The Little White Donkey" perfect by the next day. When Lulu said, "I thought you were going to the Salvation Army, why are you still here?" I threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, no Christmas or Hanukkah presents, no birthday parties for two, three, four years. When she still kept playing it wrong, I told her she was purposely working herself into a frenzy because she was secretly afraid she couldn't do it. I told her to stop being lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic.

What don't you like? I hear worse threats on a daily basis around my tony neighborhood. Hang out at Safeways, Giant, Whole Foods, Starbucks, the swimming pool, the lacrosse field, the field hockey field, restaurants and shops you'll hear the banter and engagement between annoyed parents and children. If I can hear this outside I wonder what goes on the homes?

I'm quite sure you're community is very different. No yelling, no shouting, no bullying, no divorces, no kid drugs and sex --- a perfect community indeed filled with"Western moms" trolling along in their SUVs with happy and well behaved kids in tow.

Anonymous wrote:

have lost my temper, of course. But I've never done anything like this:

Then I hauled Lulu's dollhouse to the car and told her I'd donate it to the Salvation Army piece by piece if she didn't have "The Little White Donkey" perfect by the next day. When Lulu said, "I thought you were going to the Salvation Army, why are you still here?" I threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, no Christmas or Hanukkah presents, no birthday parties for two, three, four years. When she still kept playing it wrong, I told her she was purposely working herself into a frenzy because she was secretly afraid she couldn't do it. I told her to stop being lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic.

What don't you like? I hear worse threats on a daily basis around my tony neighborhood. Hang out at Safeways, Giant, Whole Foods, Starbucks, the swimming pool, the lacrosse field, the field hockey field, restaurants and shops you'll hear the banter and engagement between annoyed parents and children. If I can hear this outside I wonder what goes on the homes?

I'm quite sure you're community is very different. No yelling, no shouting, no bullying, no divorces, no kid drugs and sex --- a perfect community indeed filled with"Western moms" trolling along in their SUVs with happy and well behaved kids in tow.

Anonymous wrote:I have lost my temper, of course. But I've never done anything like this:

Then I hauled Lulu's dollhouse to the car and told her I'd donate it to the Salvation Army piece by piece if she didn't have "The Little White Donkey" perfect by the next day. When Lulu said, "I thought you were going to the Salvation Army, why are you still here?" I threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, no Christmas or Hanukkah presents, no birthday parties for two, three, four years. When she still kept playing it wrong, I told her she was purposely working herself into a frenzy because she was secretly afraid she couldn't do it. I told her to stop being lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic.

Superb job! And BTW, it was her sister with Downs, not her daughter. So we have no idea how intuitive she would be with a disabled child.

Anonymous wrote:Excerpts from books in anticipation, or in advance, of publication are typical marketing exercises of publishing houses in America. I am surprised you aren't aware of this? It's the business model of the publishing industry reflecting raw American and "western" entrepreneurship. This is why interpretation of passages from a book taken out of full context is difficult. Like "Western mom" out there is "Chinese mom" not entitled to pursue the traditional advertising and marketing venues in our publishing industry to get her book published or are you recommending she publish on the internet (self-publish)?

That said, "Western mom" can learn from "Chinese mom" and vice versa.