Catcalls

[Anonymous]

Am I naive to be shocked by this? My daughter is 12, and still in a pretty "skinny little kid" phase. Her cousin is 6 months older, and does look significantly older than my kid, but she's still a pretty typical 13 year old. Anyhow, they both finished their vaccines, so, to celebrate, I took them touristy town to pick apples and get some ice cream. We were catcalled by passing cars, maybe 8-10 times in 2 hours while walking along a tourist strip to look in windows and get some ice cream. I'm a middle aged mom, and, while I'd like to think I'm looking good for my age, this also does not happen to me when I'm alone! (I've been out and about since I work an essential job and have been fully vaxed for ages) Not that it should matter, but they were both in reasonable (not cheeky) shorts, and high necked tank tops. Just seems so gross that it starts that early. They are barely/not even teens!

[Anonymous]

Men are gross and they are getting worse.

[Anonymous]

Yeah this ruined my childhood. I wouldn't go anywhere alone. I was catcalled, honked at, stared at. My sister had her breasts grabbed walking down a residential sidewalk.

Men are pigs.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry that happened OP. I’m not terribly surprised though. I was in an ice cream shop with my 11 year old a couple of years ago and a caught a man giving her elevator eyes. The girl working the register noticed it too so I knew it wasn’t just my imagination, which was my second inclination (first being complete rage). I sent her off to pick a seat outside with her dad. She, of course, was totally unaware.
Now I wish I had berated him but maybe ignoring was the best choice. I’d be interested to hear how others have handled or taught their daughters to handle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah this ruined my childhood. I wouldn't go anywhere alone. I was catcalled, honked at, stared at. My sister had her breasts grabbed walking down a residential sidewalk.

Men are pigs.

Some, not all.

[Anonymous]

teenage boys

[Anonymous]

Reminds me of being a teenager. At my first job we had lockers. Someone kept leaving me gifts of sexy lingerie. I would throw it out in the trash at 7-11. I was so embarrassed I never told anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah this ruined my childhood. I wouldn't go anywhere alone. I was catcalled, honked at, stared at. My sister had her breasts grabbed walking down a residential sidewalk.

Men are pigs.

I (a female) had girls do this (grabbing parts) to me too. Gross isn’t limited to one gender.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah this ruined my childhood. I wouldn't go anywhere alone. I was catcalled, honked at, stared at. My sister had her breasts grabbed walking down a residential sidewalk.

Men are pigs.

I (a female) had girls do this (grabbing parts) to me too. Gross isn’t limited to one gender.

OP here. To be fair, and I honestly hadn't thought about this until I read this post, we were yelled at once by a group of girls. That, I think was directed to me. It was a random, clearly fake complement (We love your fanny pack!) I gave a puzzled look to the two girls who said it was a "tiktok" thing to yell fake complements to people and film them. So perhaps I am now on TikTok.

Either way, yes, I'd agree that part of the behavior, appears to extend to both genders, but in our experience yesterday, it was just the males yelling sexually charged stuff.

[Anonymous]

You teach them to ignore it and learn how to size up the cat callers, trust their guts if it seems like it could escalate, and how to get themselves to safety. When my teen DD rode the public bus home from school, we had lots of discussions about moving to sit behind the driver— or— even better— near no-nonsense looking grandmas, if they ever felt harrassed.

[Anonymous]

Just don’t do what my mom did when I was that age and first started attracting attention and tell me “get used to it, it’s just what men do.” Made me nervous and angry and I didn’t understand because I was still a little kid.

[Anonymous]

What town OP? I’m curious.

[Anonymous]

Ugh. It’s the worst.

I grew up in Arlington and anytime I walked down Glebe or Williamsburg, I’d get catcalled nonstop. I also remember being 13 or so at the beach with my family, and my mom thought it was hilarious when college age guys yelled from their balconies at me. So gross.

A few years ago we moved to an area where there’s almost zero cat calling. Men mind their own business and don’t cat call, harass you, or give you elevator eyes. It’s so, so much nicer.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, op. That sucks.

[Anonymous]

Cat calling generally is not so common as it was, because it is no longer deemed socially acceptable behavior.

where were you OP, was it a particularly rural place?