Perfume is Unfashionable and Inconsiderate

[Anonymous]

Figured I would start another thread since posts keep getting deleted in the perfume thread.

I have asthma and have trouble with fragrances. This is very, very common now. At this point anyone who is wearing perfume is being willfully inconsiderate to others around them. And for those of you who think it bothers no one, maybe people are scared to tell you. I had a lovely coworker who sat on another floor that I purposely avoided seeing in person because of her perfume. I don’t think she ever realized.

[Anonymous]

I am also really allergic to perfume or any kind of scented product. It's a shame. I used to love wearing Coco Chanel.

No one should wear perfume to work or every day activities. Save it for nights out.

[Anonymous]

It never bothered me too much in the past but he’s now it does. I thjnk perhaps a dab here and there is fine? I am most offended by the ones that actually leave a space smelling of the chemicals way after they leave.

[Anonymous]

Preach!

It bothers me immensely, and I used to wear it. No more!

[Anonymous]

I would like to see a venn diagram of those with non celiac gluten intolerance and extreme perfume sensitivity. I suspect there would be a lot of overlap!

[Anonymous]

OP, if you are this sensitive and allergic, then you need to advocate for yourself. Stop the passive aggressiveness.

I had until very recently an anaphylactic reaction to ionized fish proteins; that is, I could not be in the same room or house where certain fish were being cooked. Everyone in my office knew. I carried an epi pen. I declined a sales meeting at a well known seafood and steak restaurant.

[Anonymous]

I agree, it annoys me very much to smell strong perfume.

To be able to smell someone, you should basically have your nose to their skin. So if you're not my spouse or child, I would not like to know what kind of perfume, soap or shampoo you use.

[Anonymous]

Agree. Use scented deodorant or lotion at most

[Anonymous]

Sorry, I will keep wearing a minuscule dab of J'Adore, or Poison, my two favorite perfumes. I have a very sensitive sense of smell and a tiny dab goes a very long way. Feel free to tell me that you can't stand the way I smell. I won't be offended, but I will keep doing something non-lethal that makes me happy.

Also, my son has anaphylactic allergies to peanuts and tree nuts, and I do not appreciate that people like you demand that others cater to their sensitivities when others need to carry Epipens for their lethal allergies and navigate potentially deadly situations, often daily, without making a big deal out of it. As a general rule, I've noticed that the people with the biggest burdens in life don't make the most noise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you are this sensitive and allergic, then you need to advocate for yourself. Stop the passive aggressiveness.

I had until very recently an anaphylactic reaction to ionized fish proteins; that is, I could not be in the same room or house where certain fish were being cooked. Everyone in my office knew. I carried an epi pen. I declined a sales meeting at a well known seafood and steak restaurant.

Yup. Sure, wearing so much that people can smell if they aren't giving you a hug is too much, especially for work. But your extreme view can logically be extended to "everyone must wear nonscented shampoo, soap, lotion, etc. all the time in case they come in contact with me." Just, no.

[Anonymous]

1) You undermine your argument by claiming it's "unfashionable" when what you are really saying is that it is inconsiderate in certain settings. It's only unfashionable to you because you don't like it; that's actually irrelevant if your main argument is that it is inconsiderate to people who are sensitive to smells.

2) Requesting that people wear minimal scents in an office setting, especially in an open office, is pretty reasonable. I don't think you can ask people to go totally scent free, but it is reasonable to expect people not to go heavy on perfume and to keep other scented items to a more minimal level as well, out of consideration for others.

3) If you do work withs someone whose perfume (or shampoo or body lotion or whatever) aggravates you, you can definitely ask for an accommodation. Just raise it with your immediate supervisor. They will probably just move you to another area, though depending on the work environment, they might issue a blanket request for people to tone down scents in the office.

4) But consider that your perfumed coworker genuinely does not know it bothers you. Perfume used to be much more common (and older women tend to go a little heavy on it, perhaps because their olfactory sense is not as strong) and in some cultures, heavy perfume is common and encouraged. Try to be a little more sensitive to the fact that not everyone's life revolves around your personal needs. You deserve a workplace that is comfortable and healthy for you, but your colleagues are not instantly "unfashionable and inconsiderate" for doing something they likely have no idea bothers you.

5) Many of us wear perfume regularly but do not do so while working in cubicles in an open office, and our perfume use isn't bad simply because you have had a bad experience with perfume wearers at work. I wear small amounts of perfume while working from home that are probably detectable when I go to my kid's school or go grocery shopping or get coffee. I don't see the difference between this and using a strong smelling shampoo or laundry detergent. I find the scent calming. If it bothers you, feel free to move away. Though unless you have an allergy, you might want to consider that it's okay to deal with the various smells of other humans for fleeting moments throughout the day, and that variety is the spice of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Sorry, I will keep wearing a minuscule dab of J'Adore, or Poison, my two favorite perfumes. I have a very sensitive sense of smell and a tiny dab goes a very long way. Feel free to tell me that you can't stand the way I smell. I won't be offended, but I will keep doing something non-lethal that makes me happy.

Also, my son has anaphylactic allergies to peanuts and tree nuts, and I do not appreciate that people like you demand that others cater to their sensitivities when others need to carry Epipens for their lethal allergies and navigate potentially deadly situations, often daily, without making a big deal out of it. As a general rule, I've noticed that the people with the biggest burdens in life don't make the most noise.

Sure, because they're exhausted.

Perfume is not food, though, and it's unnecessary. I'm not at all allergic, merely annoyed that you're subjecting me to your scent choice, which I cannot escape, especially indoors.

I could get behind updating social etiquette regarding perfumes to promote wearing them only for outdoor events. I really don't want to smell your Poison while enjoying a night out at a restaurant or the Kennedy Center...

A miniscule dab might be fine, though, as long as I couldn't smell you unless I was quite close to you. I think we are all talking about people who like to announce their presence by their scent and put on way too much.

[Anonymous]

I hate exhaust fumes, but people still drive. Instead of getting mad I realize it's part of living in a society.

[Anonymous]

I saw Goody Proctor with Chanel No. 5

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Sorry, I will keep wearing a minuscule dab of J'Adore, or Poison, my two favorite perfumes. I have a very sensitive sense of smell and a tiny dab goes a very long way. Feel free to tell me that you can't stand the way I smell. I won't be offended, but I will keep doing something non-lethal that makes me happy.

Also, my son has anaphylactic allergies to peanuts and tree nuts, and I do not appreciate that people like you demand that others cater to their sensitivities when others need to carry Epipens for their lethal allergies and navigate potentially deadly situations, often daily, without making a big deal out of it. As a general rule, I've noticed that the people with the biggest burdens in life don't make the most noise.

Sure, because they're exhausted.

Perfume is not food, though, and it's unnecessary. I'm not at all allergic, merely annoyed that you're subjecting me to your scent choice, which I cannot escape, especially indoors.

I could get behind updating social etiquette regarding perfumes to promote wearing them only for outdoor events. I really don't want to smell your Poison while enjoying a night out at a restaurant or the Kennedy Center...

A miniscule dab might be fine, though, as long as I couldn't smell you unless I was quite close to you. I think we are all talking about people who like to announce their presence by their scent and put on way too much.

No, there are rabid anti-perfume people who want it basically banned anywhere, in any amount.