How often do you allow your teen to get their nails done? Do you allow Gel/tips? Highlight hair?

[Anonymous]

How old is your child? Do they go on a regular basis? Manicure and/or salons? Gel on a regular manicure?

My thirteen year old asked for gel nails over spring break. Since we didn’t go anywhere I allowed her to get it but I told her a) I don’t like gel / Uv light for a young girl never mind getting regular nail polish manicures., b) She is free to do her own nails at home. Up until now I only allowed her a manicure for her birthday, Christmas time, a special treat when her friend from California visits her. In the past, it has never been a big issue. C) if she wants to continue to get her nails done she has to come up with the money herself. She’s upset because I won’t allow her to go to a salon on a regular basis and that I won’t pay for any of it with exception to Xmas, birthday, and when her California friend visits.

I pay for haircut at a very ice salon but no hair coloring or highlights. Am I being mean? She’ll be 14 this summer. What do you do in your family? Do you slow gel? Do you pay for it? Am so being over the top by saying no highlights until she’s sixteen and has her own money to do it?

[Anonymous]

None of these things on a regular basis, specifically because nail salons have too much carcinogenic fumes floating around, and because too much hair dye damages hair and potentially also has long-term toxicity. If either of these were perfectly safe, I wouldn't mind at all.

[Anonymous]

I allow my 13 year old occasional pedicures. I allow her to do her nails at home. She is begging for a manicure, tips and those fake nails (I don’t know what they are called). She can get them when she is a adult and pays for them for herself. My issue is cleanliness and germs. They are so gross. So I won’t pay for them or allow them.

As far as hair, I don’t care and I will pay for it. The issue for me is hygiene. And hair does not have the same issue as nails do.

[Anonymous]

DD is 18. She has never done any of those things except I think a pedicure once in a salon for somebody’s birthday. If she wanted that type of special treat she would be on her own to pay for it.

[Anonymous]

14. Highlights once, mostly because I let ds dye his hair twice in the past. No to gels. One manicure and one pedicure. Nothing on the regular!! But there sure are a lot of kids on social media with fully maintained expensive looks.

[Anonymous]

I don’t have a dd, but I would allow regular manicures done the little kid way. Zero gel nails, zero highlights, short nails only.

If possible, in-home service is better.

[Anonymous]

DD is 16, has babysat and worked as a lifeguard last summer. Her money, her choice how to spend it. I don't color my hair/go for regular manicures, although I do get pedicures all summer, so why would I pay for it for her?

[Anonymous]

DD is 14, I let her get a few highlights twice a year and only started letting her when she started middle school.

I told her when she got to high school she could get more, but with covid that has waited.

She has gotten her nails done a handful of times with me before a vacation or a dance competition, and with her grandma. I see nothing wrong with it, we have fun! If she were to go to get her nails done alone or for no reason I would have her pay herself!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
None of these things on a regular basis, specifically because nail salons have too much carcinogenic fumes floating around, and because too much hair dye damages hair and potentially also has long-term toxicity. If either of these were perfectly safe, I wouldn't mind at all.

[Anonymous]

No way would I take a 13 y/o to get gel tips. That is nuts. Nail care is very easy and basic and teens have a lot of free time to be able to do this. There is no reason they can't learn to trim, file, buff, and paint their own nails. Plus nail salons are gross and notorious for fungal infections. If you think yours is clean, it likely isn't.

I also would pay for highlights. A nice haircut, yes. No to professional hair color, especially highlights. It is terrible for your hair, expensive, and requires a lot of upkeep. You don't want to create a high maintenance teen. She will have a lot of trouble saving money and budgeting if she gets used to this level of pampering now.

If she wants to experiment with hair color, I'd be open to letting her use demi/semi-permanent, ammonia-free boxed drug store stuff.

[Anonymous]

If she wanted it as a birthday gift or a Christmas gift (or both), fine. Beyond that, I would absolutely not pay for it. This is a luxury - she can save and pay for it if it's important to her.

I would not stand in the way of her spending her own money on this, but there are very few things I would stand in her way of spending money on.

[Anonymous]

And before you let her blow all her money of salon services, remind her what a car costs to buy and maintain and how much she will need to save to afford the privilege of driving- unless you plan to fund all of that

[Anonymous]

Playing with drugstore hair dye in the basement is a right of passage, so I'm a hard no on hair dye. I'd consider in high school occasionally, but not regularly.

Hair cuts, yes I cover every 3-5 months or so. Nails, as a treat but not regular trips because I don't even do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No way would I take a 13 y/o to get gel tips. That is nuts. Nail care is very easy and basic and teens have a lot of free time to be able to do this. There is no reason they can't learn to trim, file, buff, and paint their own nails. Plus nail salons are gross and notorious for fungal infections. If you think yours is clean, it likely isn't.

I also would pay for highlights. A nice haircut, yes. No to professional hair color, especially highlights. It is terrible for your hair, expensive, and requires a lot of upkeep. You don't want to create a high maintenance teen. She will have a lot of trouble saving money and budgeting if she gets used to this level of pampering now.

If she wants to experiment with hair color, I'd be open to letting her use demi/semi-permanent, ammonia-free boxed drug store stuff.

I don't want my teen to grow up thinking this nail salon nonsense is a required grooming activity for women. It is consuming of money and more importantly, time, for something that lasts a few days and then get destroyed. To me it as stupid as panty hose and we managed to finally dispense with those.

[Anonymous]

I have two girls a tween and a teen, I will occasionally pay for a manicure or pedicure perhaps 2-3x per year. If she wants it any other time she has to earn money to pay for it (and by earn I mean outside the home like babysitting or selling some of the stuff she no longer wears/enjoys, she does not get an allowance or money for doing household chores). Same goes for hair color, it is in her own dime or it becomes a birthday or Christmas gift. Since those are the parameters she does not ask for it as she has found other things she wants to spend her money on or things she wants for gift giving occasions. Same goes for her cell phone, we pay for the monthly service and the first one but if she wants a new one she has to pay half. This motivates her to keep it in good condition (always has a case and a screen protector on, always aware of where it is etc). for resale to offset the cost of her half of the phone. One daughter earned money by selling clothes and unwanted toys/games, the other earned money by babysitting.

I am also that parent who makes them save some money every year for college or future expenses. There is always going to be a shiny new thing and we are doing our best to build in a mentality of delayed gratification and you have to earn it.