I have a terrible fear of dying young and leaving my kids behind before they grow up

[Anonymous]

If you've struggled with this, did anything help?

[Anonymous]

I think about this sometimes. I have an amazing and still youngish (65) mom. She would move in with my husband and take better care of my kids than I would... this is what helps me relax. This and the fact your hat my grandmas died after 93 and one at 97 is still alive.

[Anonymous]

Wear sunscreen and seatbelts, only have relationships with mentally healthy people, and draw up a will.

[Anonymous]

See you doctor and get a prescription for anxiety. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think about this sometimes. I have an amazing and still youngish (65) mom. She would move in with my husband and take better care of my kids than I would... this is what helps me relax. This and the fact your hat my grandmas died after 93 and one at 97 is still alive.

If i had to rely on my parents, the kids would be in foster care. You are fortunate. My mom already said if something happened to us she wouldn't take my kids or help. I told her no worries, the same back at her.

[Anonymous]

Having lots of life insurance - to be placed in a trust and administered by my parents in the event of my death - makes me feel better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think about this sometimes. I have an amazing and still youngish (65) mom. She would move in with my husband and take better care of my kids than I would... this is what helps me relax. This and the fact your hat my grandmas died after 93 and one at 97 is still alive.

If i had to rely on my parents, the kids would be in foster care. You are fortunate. My mom already said if something happened to us she wouldn't take my kids or help. I told her no worries, the same back at her.

Same here. Yinz kids all better pray nothing happens to mama!
Having a lot of life insurance (5 mil) helps me mentally.

[Anonymous]

I have this fear as well, but what can you do? You have to live your life and let your kids live theirs. I get regular check-ups including 2x/year mole checks, wear my seatbelt, and try to make safe choices. You have to learn to loosen your grip a little, and use the fear as a reminder to make the most of right now. I would hate to miss what's next, but I feel good about the memories I have made with my kids and will keep working to make more.

[Anonymous]

Yes but I also have many other fears: me dying, husband dying, kids dying. It’s all bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think about this sometimes. I have an amazing and still youngish (65) mom. She would move in with my husband and take better care of my kids than I would... this is what helps me relax. This and the fact your hat my grandmas died after 93 and one at 97 is still alive.

If i had to rely on my parents, the kids would be in foster care. You are fortunate. My mom already said if something happened to us she wouldn't take my kids or help. I told her no worries, the same back at her.

Same here. Yinz kids all better pray nothing happens to mama!
Having a lot of life insurance (5 mil) helps me mentally.

I am really sorry... I know I am fortunate and hope to be the same for my children and grandchildren

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think about this sometimes. I have an amazing and still youngish (65) mom. She would move in with my husband and take better care of my kids than I would... this is what helps me relax. This and the fact your hat my grandmas died after 93 and one at 97 is still alive.

If i had to rely on my parents, the kids would be in foster care. You are fortunate. My mom already said if something happened to us she wouldn't take my kids or help. I told her no worries, the same back at her.

Same here. Yinz kids all better pray nothing happens to mama!
Having a lot of life insurance (5 mil) helps me mentally.

Hello fellow Pittsburgh person

[Anonymous]

Seek help for the anxiety. You don’t have to live like this.

[Anonymous]

Dealing with your mortality is nothing new.

But give yourself a reality check. You're healthy, right? You're a proactive "safe" person, right (seatbelts, smoke alarm, not a risk taker)?

Sure there's a risk to everything, but you have good odds the majority if the time.

Start living in the moment. Soak up the kids chaos. Don't waste your worry on the "what ifs".

[Anonymous]

Anxiety meds have helped me.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if anxiety meds would help me, but I have to assume that the occasional thoughts that can keep me up at night or move me to tears are not necessarily indicative of an *actual* anxiety disorder, right? I'm open to being wrong, butt I guess I kind of assumed this is just part of parenting.