If you went to an Ivy

[Anonymous]

Do your friends with same age DC (seniors) assume that your DC will attend that school? Are they persistent about it? If so, do you find it rude (ie: assuming you have already answered no several times)?

[Anonymous]

No, I don’t care. I usually just dodge the question by saying my poor college career surely doomed any chance of my child ever going there.

[Anonymous]

No. I've had recent zoom get togethers with a group of around 10 college friends and no one expects each other's kids to even apply to our school let alone attend. In fact, so far not one is going there. I don't know if any have even applied because unless someone volunteers that info, no one asks where the kids are applying (just eventually where did they decide to go). Also, I think we all recognize that admissions is a different ball game than when we applied 30+ years ago. I would find it odd and rude for anyone in my group to be persistent about asking. But maybe that's just us.

[Anonymous]

My family is shocked when I tell them my child won’t even bother applying even though she has the same GPA I had, only a 3.4. They don’t understand how hard it is to get in now from this area. I was applying from a rural area.

[Anonymous]

Didn't go to an Ivy.

[Anonymous]

No. We all joke that we wouldn't get in today (which is true, ouch) lol.

[Anonymous]

No, my husband's bad genes diluted our child's IQ to the point that it is not feasible or attainable. On a serious note, never comes up and I wouldn't engage in the conversation if it did.

[Anonymous]

My friends don't even know I went to an Ivy, unless they've spied on my linkedIn profile!

But my parents and ILs (all Ivy people) are constantly offering college advice which we've all decided to just passively accept. No sense in trying to reeducate anyone! My son did terribly in HS (literally 2.2 GPA, if that) and my FIL was like, "Colorado College would be perfect for him..."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My family is shocked when I tell them my child won’t even bother applying even though she has the same GPA I had, only a 3.4. They don’t understand how hard it is to get in now from this area. I was applying from a rural area.

I have this problem. Several relatives and in-laws ranging from age 40 to 80 who were at ivies (along with my siblings and me). They are all very snobby AND very clueless about the different landscape today. My DCs are very qualified but unhooked and I completely assume they won’t get in. We are fine with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. We all joke that we wouldn't get in today (which is true, ouch) lol.

+1

Same.

[Anonymous]

Tangent comment. One thing I had to discover and convey to my child is that my SAT score from the late 1980s is on a different scale than now. My original SAT score is well below what my college has as its average SAT now.

Child thought that my SAT, which was really pretty good for the 1980s, was sort of mediocre. As a result, child kept suggesting I did not study hard, and so child need not study hard either. Child also used it as excuse to suggest that college was completely different then, so my opinions are meritless. Once I found a few webpages showing the conversion factor, child gained a little more respect for my score and my opinions.

Teens like to think we know nothing, but that’s not quite right.

[Anonymous]

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tangent comment. One thing I had to discover and convey to my child is that my SAT score from the late 1980s is on a different scale than now. My original SAT score is well below what my college has as its average SAT now.

Child thought that my SAT, which was really pretty good for the 1980s, was sort of mediocre. As a result, child kept suggesting I did not study hard, and so child need not study hard either. Child also used it as excuse to suggest that college was completely different then, so my opinions are meritless. Once I found a few webpages showing the conversion factor, child gained a little more respect for my score and my opinions.

Teens like to think we know nothing, but that’s not quite right.

Its weird that you told your kid your SAT score. Are in competing with your child?

I don't even remember mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tangent comment. One thing I had to discover and convey to my child is that my SAT score from the late 1980s is on a different scale than now. My original SAT score is well below what my college has as its average SAT now.

Child thought that my SAT, which was really pretty good for the 1980s, was sort of mediocre. As a result, child kept suggesting I did not study hard, and so child need not study hard either. Child also used it as excuse to suggest that college was completely different then, so my opinions are meritless. Once I found a few webpages showing the conversion factor, child gained a little more respect for my score and my opinions.

Teens like to think we know nothing, but that’s not quite right.

That's when I bust out the "Kid, I've lived life without you, you've never lived life without me" quote.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. We all joke that we wouldn't get in today (which is true, ouch) lol.

+1

Same.

+2 also, whilst I gently nudged DC towards my alma mater neither had any interest at all. They both ended up at the college where they belong and all is well.