Siblings, who live abroad, didn’t respond when I reached out to them reacting to the events on Jan 6

[Anonymous]

My sisters both live on different continents, and I live in DC. When the events were unfolding on Jan 6th, I texted them (our usual way of contacting each other, given the time difference) in a panic with my concerns over what was happening. I texted several times between 2 and 6 pm our time that day, and again the next day reiterating that things were crazy, it get scary, etc.

Neither of them replied to me. I never expect an immediate reply, but given the circumstances, and that it was all over the news, I thought they’d respond within a couple of days. Finally yesterday I said something to them along the lines of, I understand your not replying doesn’t mean you don’t care, but it does make me sad. I was hoping to connect with you over this, you are American, etc. (both are very liberal btw)

They responded something like, sorry, we’re just busy.

I’m upset. I’m disappointed. Putting aside whether you think it’s “reasonable” for someone in my position to be scared by Wednesdays events, I reached out to them and heard nothing back. Honesty even if I hadn’t reached out to them first I would have thought they’d have heard the news and reached out to me.

Am I crazy to be hurt here?

[Anonymous]

Similar experience, and my family members live in other large cities on the East coast. Strangely they told me they were glued to the tv all day watching events unfold but seemed to have no thoughts or caring that people living in DC would be frightened and affected by this. I don’t get it. They actually said to me “But you don’t live near Capitol Hill.” I checked on everyone I knew in NYC on 9/11. Not just people in the World Trade Center.

[Anonymous]

Do you text them a lot? Maybe they are sending you a message that they want less communication. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you. Just cut back and see what response you get. Whatever the usual volume of text messages is, cut that in half or more. See what happens.

Or if you want to be more direct, call them and ask what’s up and whether your text messages bother them.

[Anonymous]

Honestly--I would have rolled my eyes and thought you were being over dramatic. That said--I would have responded even if I thought you were over-reacting. I'm sorry they blew you off.
Are you normally close and this was a one time thing? Are they normally dismissive? Do you send them a lot of over-wrought texts and they're tired of it? It's hard to know how to feel without more context.

(But this was nothing like 9/11. That comparison is ludicrous.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly--I would have rolled my eyes and thought you were being over dramatic. That said--I would have responded even if I thought you were over-reacting. I'm sorry they blew you off.
Are you normally close and this was a one time thing? Are they normally dismissive? Do you send them a lot of over-wrought texts and they're tired of it? It's hard to know how to feel without more context.

(But this was nothing like 9/11. That comparison is ludicrous.)

It turned out to be nothing like 9/11. While it was going on, the fear was how big it would get.

[Anonymous]

1. Where do your sisters live? Depending on where they live stuff like this could be a regular occurrence and thus not be scary for them. D you text them every time something similar happens in the countries they live in?

2. While the attack was deeply disturbing, They obviously knew you were okay.Unlike 9/11 .

3. You describe your sisters as very liberally. I may be wrong but I suspect that means you are on different sides of the political aisle. They probably knew and have been daying this will happen since 2016 and didn't want to say " I told you so"

[Anonymous]

You sound very dramatic. That said, I don't ignore texts and would also be peeved if someone ignored repeated texts of mine. Are you usually close?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly--I would have rolled my eyes and thought you were being over dramatic. That said--I would have responded even if I thought you were over-reacting. I'm sorry they blew you off.
Are you normally close and this was a one time thing? Are they normally dismissive? Do you send them a lot of over-wrought texts and they're tired of it? It's hard to know how to feel without more context.

(But this was nothing like 9/11. That comparison is ludicrous.)

It turned out to be nothing like 9/11. While it was going on, the fear was how big it would get.

NP, but it did not get close to 9/11 level. I'm disgusted and appalled at the events of 1/6, but unless you work at the Capitol OP, this sounds like a plea for attention from your sisters. And perhaps they feel like you do this kind of thing often - text to look for responses of attention.

If you work at the Capitol or a significant federal building and they did not respond, then I understand being upset at them.

[Anonymous]

I understand what you’re saying, OP, but I do think you’re being overly sensitive. You live in the same region as an event that was horrible for the whole nation but that had nothing to do with you personally and during which you were not remotely in danger. It never feels good to have your texts ignored but you need to keep this in perspective— they did not ignore you during a personal emergency. They ignored your texts about a National event.

[Anonymous]

When a terrorist event happened in best friend’s city, I called immediately. And I stayed on the phone with her with two hours until she felt safe. It has been days now since the coup attempt and she hasn’t even texted me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound very dramatic. That said, I don't ignore texts and would also be peeved if someone ignored repeated texts of mine. Are you usually close?

It irritates the crap out of me if my sister texts me with emotional over the top shit. It also shows she has zero perspective that there is a person with a whole life of their own at the other end of the phone.

Perhaps if you'd led with "what are your thoughts on this?" or "how are you doing over there" and not made it entirely about you, you may have had a response.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s pretty self-absorbed to expect others to check in on them when something major happens in their city. It’s way bigger than you and there’s a lot for everyone to process, no matter where they live. Unless you happen to work at the Capitol or live in very close proximity, I wouldn’t expect a check-in. They should have at least responded, though.

—someone who lived in NYC on 9/11

[Anonymous]

I live downtown, in the closed off zone. And you seem like a drama queen. I have a couple friends who live a block or two from the capital, and I reached out to them to make sure they were safely inside. Otherwise, there was no danger. Like less than before Trump directed the anger towards the Capitol. It must be hard being you, but I can see why people would ignore the drama fits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound very dramatic. That said, I don't ignore texts and would also be peeved if someone ignored repeated texts of mine. Are you usually close?

It irritates the crap out of me if my sister texts me with emotional over the top shit. It also shows she has zero perspective that there is a person with a whole life of their own at the other end of the phone.

Perhaps if you'd led with "what are your thoughts on this?" or "how are you doing over there" and not made it entirely about you, you may have had a response.

OTOH, it doesn’t cost much - one or two texts - to be kind. You don’t have to texttexttext for days.

[Anonymous]

Nobody cares that much and regular people do not see it as a major event. Were you in any danger on the day? Were you attacked? Did anything really happen to you?
You sound like an overreacting person and an annoying one at that.
It happened, it was over quickly and so what? My super annoying ILS family did not send a single text about it at all.