Advice for a west coaster moving to the east coast

[Anonymous]

I am a young person, have lived on the west coast my whole life, and am thinking of moving to one of the larger cities out east.

This is something I've wanted for a while- I like the classic look of the cities, the foliage, the old buildings, but I have some concerns.

I have heard the east coast is very fast paced, and if you're not on the ball, you will get left behind. I consider myself a hard worker but not looking forward to being outpaced by colleagues or not being able to have a work/life balance.

I've also heard east coast people can be shockingly direct. My family is mostly passive aggressive when they get mad, and that's what I tend to be used to. It's worked well where I live, but I'm not sure how I would be able to handle conflicts with the kind of people who "tell it like it is". To me, again, thinking of work situations, it sounds somewhat daunting.

Would love to hear from anyone who has made this move or has experiences in these areas.

[Anonymous]

Visit during the winter and see if you can handle it. I'm from CA and now live in DC area. The weather is my biggest regret.

As far as personality, there is a wide variety of people. It is a little more conservative here as far as workplace attitudes.

[Anonymous]

Just be on time, work hard, be polite, and don’t wear shoulder-less shirts or Birkenstocks to work and you’ll be fine. It’s only certain industries in certain cities that are brutal. Most are normal.

[Anonymous]

Another Californian living in DC now. The weather is really different--I love it, but if you prefer temperate all the time, this is not the place for you. There is way less magical thinking and tolerance for hippy-dippy people out here. This is not a politics thing, it's a culture thing. Again, I love it. People are waaaayy more conservative socially--people dress more conservatively, there are fewer people living way outside the mainstream (communes, polyamory, etc.), and traditional etiquette is more expected. I have not spent a lot of time in other east coast cities, so this could all be DC specific, but there are lots of difference between East and West besides the architecture and the foliage.

[Anonymous]

Geographic stereotypes are like any other stereotypes- there’s a kernel of truth to them, but it certainly doesn’t describe EVERBODY and EVERYTHING. If you have good job prospects, go for it! If it doesn’t work out, it won’t be because of some worn out trope about east coast vs. west coast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Visit during the winter and see if you can handle it. I'm from CA and now live in DC area. The weather is my biggest regret.

As far as personality, there is a wide variety of people. It is a little more conservative here as far as workplace attitudes.

I'm from CA.. lived there for 40 years. I can handle the DC area winter. It's the humid summers I can't handle. You can bundle up in the winter, and now even wear a face mask without getting funny looks. But what can you do in the summer? You can't shed your skin, though sometimes, I feel like doing exactly this in the summer.

I do find that the east coast is much more into "what do you do" than the west coast.

[Anonymous]

NP here but did anyone actually read the OP? They never once mentioned weather but that seems to be what all the posts are about. They were very specific, actually

[Anonymous]

It’s very fast paced. People are always “on.” The closer you are to DC, the more your news is dominated by politics.

[Anonymous]

If you're young, I say give it a try. Why not? Culture in terms of fast-paced competitiveness varies more by industry than by location. Culture in terms of friendliness/directness/(rudeness?) of people varies up and down the coast; I've found New Englanders a lot more stonyfaced and grumpy-seeming than people in Philly and south, and in Manhattan it varies by neighborhood—though I love all those places for their older architecture and many other things.

If you move to DC and are surrounded only by young people who've also moved to DC early in their careers, it can be hard to break out of that competitive, workaholic vibe, but there is plenty of city here that isn't like that. If you make it a priority to meet neighbors of other ages and backgrounds, especially locals and not just recent transplants, you can have a very different and more relaxed and well-rounded experience of the city. It takes some intention to make happen, but it's good advice for anywhere you end up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Visit during the winter and see if you can handle it. I'm from CA and now live in DC area. The weather is my biggest regret.

As far as personality, there is a wide variety of people. It is a little more conservative here as far as workplace attitudes.

I'm from CA.. lived there for 40 years. I can handle the DC area winter. It's the humid summers I can't handle. You can bundle up in the winter, and now even wear a face mask without getting funny looks. But what can you do in the summer? You can't shed your skin, though sometimes, I feel like doing exactly this in the summer.

I do find that the east coast is much more into "what do you do" than the west coast.

Brogrammer culture has made West Coast “what can you do for my company?” It’s so mercantile now.

[Anonymous]

People are nice in stores and such, like compared to seats Coast EVERY STORE in California is a Trader Joe’s

If you already own in California, don’t sell. We did and now can’t afford to move back.

There are a lot more reasonable options of commute, school, community here on East coast than places like Bay Area and LA. Because public schools are better funded, it’s not just Palo Alto that has decent schools, even more middle class places have good schools (imagine it South San Jose had all GS8 or GS9, that’s like Burke here). That makes for a much more nuanced spectrum of neighborhoods and less private school over all.

Yes, summers are hot and humid, but assuming you work a 9-5 it’s mostly just weekends. Which means you head to the pool every weekend. And Atlantic oceans are very swimmable with much warmer water and hot sun, vs LA where only surfers in wet suits really get wet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are nice in stores and such, like compared to seats Coast EVERY STORE in California is a Trader Joe’s

If you already own in California, don’t sell. We did and now can’t afford to move back.

There are a lot more reasonable options of commute, school, community here on East coast than places like Bay Area and LA. Because public schools are better funded, it’s not just Palo Alto that has decent schools, even more middle class places have good schools (imagine it South San Jose had all GS8 or GS9, that’s like Burke here). That makes for a much more nuanced spectrum of neighborhoods and less private school over all.

Yes, summers are hot and humid, but assuming you work a 9-5 it’s mostly just weekends. Which means you head to the pool every weekend. And Atlantic oceans are very swimmable with much warmer water and hot sun, vs LA where only surfers in wet suits really get wet.

NP. Are you saying they are nicer here then in the west?

[Anonymous]

I’m from the Pacific Northwest. I moved to the East Coast for my first job out of college (Boston) and it was a huge culture shock. Everyone seemed rude, cold and socially conservative. Even white people were segregated—Irish neighborhoods, Italian neighborhoods, etc. The constant feeling of being rushed and ignored passed as I got used to it, but it was a lonely and exhausting first winter. DC (not The Hill, but regular-jobs-DC) is much less uptight and, surprisingly, less segregated (racially and socioeconomically, which says a lot about Boston) in my opinion. I agree about the weather—snow for months on end is hard. It also feels like outdoor activities are harder to find, but that’s mostly because of the traffic.

[Anonymous]

Bay Area person here, living in VA these last 15 years. I agree the summer is worse than the winter -- but then again, we didn't have 100 degree days and wildfires this summer like the Bay Area did.

I don't find the people particularly direct at all. It is culturally and politically more conservative, and people are judgy rule followers. There is less social consciousness or sense of community responsibility, more "I got mine." The status markers are different but both places are equally status conscious, I think.

Personally I hate the architecture here, and it took a decade for the landscape to grow on me. But, the everyday living is a lot better than the Bay Area in many ways. Less crowded, better public transit, more diversity of housing and easier to afford a big lot if that's what you want. The open space / parks are less impressive but scattered in such a way you can easily get outdoors in any neighborhood without having to drive a long distance. I think it's the best value, in terms of balancing housing, amenities, and jobs.

[Anonymous]

Depends where on the west coast and where you’re moving. Yes, New Yorkers are direct and life is faster paced there.

If you mean you’re moving to DC, people aren’t really that direct and life is a lot more suburban. You’ll probably be shocked at how black and white DC is (you’re going to miss the Asian and Mexican people/food/culture of the West Coast) and how starkly divided the city is along socioeconomic lines.