Inheritance/gift to child and spouse or just child?

[Anonymous]

My father expressed that he would like to gift $ to my kids for their education and also cash gifts up to IRS gift limit to my sibling and I (unclear whether this is one time or over a series of years) with the idea that the gift would be made joint to each sibling and their spouse. I was asked what I thought about that and my gut reaction was to make the gifts sole gifts to me and my sibling. My logic is if I am still married and something happens to me the gift/inheritance money goes to my spouse if spouse is still living and we are still married, or to my kids. I mean, I guess I can spend it on just me and it's gone, but that's just kind of the risk you take as the benefactor?

I see the other side too - that as the in-laws you don't want to be creating a division between spouses, but I just think it has the potential for weirdness and that the spouse should understand in that it's natural for parents to gift to their children and generous to include the spouse.

What do you think?

[Anonymous]

Maybe I’m not understanding, but a gift to my spouse is a gift to me and vice versa. A large windfall would either pay off our mortgage, funds kids school, or get put into a joint brokerage account.

[Anonymous]

Child only, child decides whether to share.

[Anonymous]

I think it's not unusual to make smaller gifts to both spouses, but generally an inheritance (for some unforeseeable time in the future) is just to the child.

[Anonymous]

To child only.

[Anonymous]

Inheritance and money gifts are normally to the child, not the child & spouse, to ensure it's not marital property. That protects the gift in the event of divorce, but also in the event of the spouse getting sued. Is the spouse a Dr, a lawyer, a landlord, or any other profession at risk of being sued? If it's not his/her property, then it can't be awarded in a lawsuit against the spouse and then the couple at least still has some money left protected. Both spouses should always keep at least part of their assets as non-marital, when they can. It protects the family in more ways than one.

[Anonymous]

It would be weird/concerning to me if my spouse inherited money and it didn’t go into a joint venture or account of some sort. After being married for a decade plus, if the will was written in a way that it was just for the child, I’d be offended. I’d also be mad at my spouse if they took it and put it into a solo account. We’re supposed to be partners and building a life together. To take a windfall as solely their own says a lot about where the relationship stands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I’m not understanding, but a gift to my spouse is a gift to me and vice versa. A large windfall would either pay off our mortgage, funds kids school, or get put into a joint brokerage account.

OP here. I'm not talking about how you spend the $, but who it legally belongs to.

Thanks to those that answered and reinforced my gut reaction on this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's not unusual to make smaller gifts to both spouses, but generally an inheritance (for some unforeseeable time in the future) is just to the child.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It would be weird/concerning to me if my spouse inherited money and it didn’t go into a joint venture or account of some sort. After being married for a decade plus, if the will was written in a way that it was just for the child, I’d be offended. I’d also be mad at my spouse if they took it and put it into a solo account. We’re supposed to be partners and building a life together. To take a windfall as solely their own says a lot about where the relationship stands.

It’s very usual for a child who inherits money or property not to commingle it with marital assets.

[Anonymous]

my grandmother has been giving myself, my wife and my daughter the max allowed by the IRS every year for quite some time. and she set up a 529 for my daughter.

Her rationale, "I'd rather be able to see you enjoy it and not be taxed on it"

And its possible when she dies, she could will money to all three of us, plus my parents plus others. Or she could see fit to only will money to her children.

I guess all you folks must have shitty marriages to even consider hoping that an inheritance or gift is only "for you" and not to be shared with your spouse..

[Anonymous]

Is he talking about the $15k a year gift? If so, he has to gift it to each person, separately.

$15k to
You
Each of your children
Your spouse

This can be done annually. If he has a spouse, they can do the same. In that case, each grandchild would receive a total of $30k per year and each couple would receive a total of $60k per year ($30k to each spouse).

There are other ways to gift more than the $15k, they require paperwork.

[Anonymous]

give it to the direct line descendant only. dh absolutely would want all the money/control. very selfish and self centered. He can have it because it’s not worth his bad attitude. I’m all about the family so I would share regardless!

[Anonymous]

Child only.

[Anonymous]

Child only. But if you have a joint account know that the second you put that money in a joint checking or savings account it is no longer just yours. My parents have gifted money to my spouse when they wanted to gift over the individual limit so I got a check and my DH got a check