Neighbor with another woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy I went to college with saw a married female colleague leaving a hotel room that wasn't hers while they were on a conference trip.

He jokingly told her he'd tell her husband if she didn't give him a BJ.

She actually gave him one. He said he felt pretty bad about it but it was obvious that she was pretty much a tramp.

I'm really surprised that he confessed to you that he raped her. You should report this to the police.

I'm really embarrassed for you that you can confidently proclaim that a rape occurred just from reading a post about a single sided, second hand, 20 year old story without a complainant. I guarantee you voted for HRC.

No, I am a Republican. But I know what rape is when one is described. Your friend is a rapist. And you're disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy I went to college with saw a married female colleague leaving a hotel room that wasn't hers while they were on a conference trip.

He jokingly told her he'd tell her husband if she didn't give him a BJ.

She actually gave him one. He said he felt pretty bad about it but it was obvious that she was pretty much a tramp.

He should feel pretty bad it's sextortion and it's a serious crime. Whether he was joking or not the fact that she complied does not obviously make her a tramp it means she was coerced into performing a sexual act for fear of the threat of something terrible happening. It's sick and depraved and it is no different than any other form of gender-based violence against women. It's no different than when teachers coerce sex acts from students in exchange for fair grades, no different than when landlords demand sex in lieu of rent, no different than when judges extort sex in exchange for favorable custody decisions. It's the equivalent of putting a gun to a woman's head and requesting they provide you with a sexual favor in return for sparing their life. Consent cannot occur in a situation where the person is coerced, such as when they have a gun to their head, or are under threat of something terrible happening. Blackmail is a form of coercion. The guy you went to college with belongs in jail.

Yes. You only have his word that he said it "jokingly". She could well have interpreted it as a threat, and felt she really was stuck. You should have given your friend hell for this.

[Anonymous]

There a million maybes that you don’t have the answer to.

Maybe they have a don’t ask don’t tell policy.

Maybe they are poly.

Maybe they are only still together for kids and she is out doing same thing.

Maybe they are in a mutual open relationship

Maybe they get off as a couple on him being with other woman

Maybe YOU don’t know everything YOU think YOU do.

But there is no YOU in THEIR relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - well a playdate happened today and made my DH answer the phone and door when my neighbor (his wife) came by. Told him to tell her I was feeling good and upstairs sleeping. The anxiety of this is ripping me apart.

Oh ffs, grow up.

This would really upset me too. I'm bad at lying and keeping secrets. OP I would go the anonymous letter route

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There a million maybes that you don’t have the answer to.

Maybe they have a don’t ask don’t tell policy.

Maybe they are poly.

Maybe they are only still together for kids and she is out doing same thing.

Maybe they are in a mutual open relationship

Maybe they get off as a couple on him being with other woman

Maybe YOU don’t know everything YOU think YOU do.

But there is no YOU in THEIR relationship.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There a million maybes that you don’t have the answer to.

Maybe they have a don’t ask don’t tell policy.

Maybe they are poly.

Maybe they are only still together for kids and she is out doing same thing.

Maybe they are in a mutual open relationship

Maybe they get off as a couple on him being with other woman

Maybe YOU don’t know everything YOU think YOU do.

But there is no YOU in THEIR relationship.

This! Our next door neighbors have (what is to us) and unusual relationship. She takes trips without him and while she's gone he has other women at their house.

It's not something you need to try to see, he spends time with them in the front yard, holding hands and going for walks with them. The wife seems fine with it as long as she gets to spend money the way she wants, and she seems to spend a lot of money. He complains about her starting things and never finishing them but other than that it seems to work for them.

There are many different types of people and many different types of marriages and/or relationships. What would be a life of hell to one person is what works for another. I would leave it alone and honestly, try not to think about it or it's going to bother you while they are just fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A neighbor saw a man leaving my house at 1 am while my husband was out of town and told my husband. My husband and I had a good laugh about it because it was a very married friend of ours from grad school who happened to be in town on business. We hadn't seen each other in five years and had a lot to catch up on so we stayed up late drinking wine and talking. My husband knew he would be stopping by and this would likely happen. My husband and I have been together for two decades and don't have trust issues in our relationship. MYOB.

so, was the sex as good as you remembered?

[Anonymous]

Post it on nextdoor, title "nextdoor whore spotted"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - well a playdate happened today and made my DH answer the phone and door when my neighbor (his wife) came by. Told him to tell her I was feeling good and upstairs sleeping. The anxiety of this is ripping me apart.

Oh ffs, grow up.

This would really upset me too. I'm bad at lying and keeping secrets. OP I would go the anonymous letter route

You don’t have to lie OR keep a secret because no one has asked you to and none of this is your business

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy I went to college with saw a married female colleague leaving a hotel room that wasn't hers while they were on a conference trip.

He jokingly told her he'd tell her husband if she didn't give him a BJ.

She actually gave him one. He said he felt pretty bad about it but it was obvious that she was pretty much a tramp.

I'm really surprised that he confessed to you that he raped her. You should report this to the police.

I'm really embarrassed for you that you can confidently proclaim that a rape occurred just from reading a post about a single sided, second hand, 20 year old story without a complainant. I guarantee you voted for HRC.

No, I am a Republican. But I know what rape is when one is described. Your friend is a rapist. And you're disgusting.

Nope! Try again!. I guess that you are a slut that regrets her past. Hope that helps!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - forgot to mention that our kids play together. I'm spooked by the thought of future play-dates .

That makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - well a playdate happened today and made my DH answer the phone and door when my neighbor (his wife) came by. Told him to tell her I was feeling good and upstairs sleeping. The anxiety of this is ripping me apart.

Oh ffs, grow up.

This would really upset me too. I'm bad at lying and keeping secrets. OP I would go the anonymous letter route

What a coward you are.