At what age did your friends start divorcing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am almost 38, and among people I know who are roughly the same age, nearly all the divorces are happening to parents of one child, under the age of 2. In one case, the husband started an affair during pregnancy and is now getting remarried to his mistress with the ink barely dry on his divorce decree. In the other handful of cases, it's just seems like the baby breaks the relationship. Pretty sad. I know one divorce of a two lawyer couple around our age...fairly typical, met in law school, cohabitated, she pressed for an engagement, he agreed, then it ended after about 3.5 years because there was no there there and their financial habits varied wildly. I don't think he ever really loved her and she loves everybody she dates.

It’s lack of sex, not the baby, which breaks the relationship.

Oh pls. Sex doesn't carry a long term marriage, lol.

Looking back at many of the people we've known I would say late 30's and 40's. All different reasons. One divorced her husband because he literally would not help with the kids. They both had f/t jobs. One wife cheated, but her life is crap. She's currently on her 2nd divorce. Her 1st husband is doing well. Many divorced over money problems, probably one of the biggest problems. Another couldn't stand her husbands family, kids from the first marriage, and finally divorced him. Marriage is hard no matter how you cut it. Loyalty, commitment, and compromise have to work in a marriage otherwise it will end in divorce, or unhappiness.

Nobody has said that sex carries a marriage.
But lack of sex absolutely 100% does destroy a marriage.
Want to know if you are headed for divorce? Check your sex life.

and what wrecks a sex life? losing respect for your spouse. maybe s/he deserves the loss of respect, maybe not.

marriage, raising kids, taking good care of yourself/spouse/kids/house -- all of that is hard hard work, 24/7/365.

when people say "Having kids will really change your life," they are not merely talking about you not getting a full nights sleep, having to wash bottles, and going around with a baby or toddler. they are talking about this is Test Time - THE ultimate test on how reliable, communicate able, hard-working, and good habits you and your spouse have. If one spouses fails to be reliable in life, respect is loss, who wants to have sex with a loser, marriage is unhappy for both. but scheduled sex with a loser is not going to fix anything, just build more resentment. Hard work and change for the better will, and will lead to sex again.

Yes. Lack of communication and unwilling to compromise with your spouse will lead to divorce. If you don't respect your spouse don't think the sex will happen.

Why are you married to an unreliable non-hardworking loser spouse whom don't respect and resent even the very idea of sex?!?
FILE FOR DIVORCE TODAY!
But..... if you stay with this horrible evil person... do not expect him to remain "faithful".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
and what wrecks a sex life? losing respect for your spouse. maybe s/he deserves the loss of respect, maybe not.

marriage, raising kids, taking good care of yourself/spouse/kids/house -- all of that is hard hard work, 24/7/365.

when people say "Having kids will really change your life," they are not merely talking about you not getting a full nights sleep, having to wash bottles, and going around with a baby or toddler. they are talking about this is Test Time - THE ultimate test on how reliable, communicate able, hard-working, and good habits you and your spouse have. If one spouses fails to be reliable in life, respect is loss, who wants to have sex with a loser, marriage is unhappy for both. but scheduled sex with a loser is not going to fix anything, just build more resentment. Hard work and change for the better will, and will lead to sex again.

Yes. Lack of communication and unwilling to compromise with your spouse will lead to divorce. If you don't respect your spouse don't think the sex will happen.

Part of the problem is that a *lot* of things wreck a sex life. A person can be doing all the right things in a marriage and still have his/her partner be uninterested in sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am almost 38, and among people I know who are roughly the same age, nearly all the divorces are happening to parents of one child, under the age of 2. In one case, the husband started an affair during pregnancy and is now getting remarried to his mistress with the ink barely dry on his divorce decree. In the other handful of cases, it's just seems like the baby breaks the relationship. Pretty sad. I know one divorce of a two lawyer couple around our age...fairly typical, met in law school, cohabitated, she pressed for an engagement, he agreed, then it ended after about 3.5 years because there was no there there and their financial habits varied wildly. I don't think he ever really loved her and she loves everybody she dates.

It’s lack of sex, not the baby, which breaks the relationship.

Oh pls. Sex doesn't carry a long term marriage, lol.

Looking back at many of the people we've known I would say late 30's and 40's. All different reasons. One divorced her husband because he literally would not help with the kids. They both had f/t jobs. One wife cheated, but her life is crap. She's currently on her 2nd divorce. Her 1st husband is doing well. Many divorced over money problems, probably one of the biggest problems. Another couldn't stand her husbands family, kids from the first marriage, and finally divorced him. Marriage is hard no matter how you cut it. Loyalty, commitment, and compromise have to work in a marriage otherwise it will end in divorce, or unhappiness.

Nobody has said that sex carries a marriage.
But lack of sex absolutely 100% does destroy a marriage.
Want to know if you are headed for divorce? Check your sex life.

and what wrecks a sex life? losing respect for your spouse. maybe s/he deserves the loss of respect, maybe not.

marriage, raising kids, taking good care of yourself/spouse/kids/house -- all of that is hard hard work, 24/7/365.

when people say "Having kids will really change your life," they are not merely talking about you not getting a full nights sleep, having to wash bottles, and going around with a baby or toddler. they are talking about this is Test Time - THE ultimate test on how reliable, communicate able, hard-working, and good habits you and your spouse have. If one spouses fails to be reliable in life, respect is loss, who wants to have sex with a loser, marriage is unhappy for both. but scheduled sex with a loser is not going to fix anything, just build more resentment. Hard work and change for the better will, and will lead to sex again.

Yes. Lack of communication and unwilling to compromise with your spouse will lead to divorce. If you don't respect your spouse don't think the sex will happen.

Why are you married to an unreliable non-hardworking loser spouse whom don't respect and resent even the very idea of sex?!?
FILE FOR DIVORCE TODAY!
But..... if you stay with this horrible evil person... do not expect him to remain "faithful".

Don't know why you're projecting. If a loser is resorting to cheating it's time for him to find the door!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am almost 38, and among people I know who are roughly the same age, nearly all the divorces are happening to parents of one child, under the age of 2. In one case, the husband started an affair during pregnancy and is now getting remarried to his mistress with the ink barely dry on his divorce decree. In the other handful of cases, it's just seems like the baby breaks the relationship. Pretty sad. I know one divorce of a two lawyer couple around our age...fairly typical, met in law school, cohabitated, she pressed for an engagement, he agreed, then it ended after about 3.5 years because there was no there there and their financial habits varied wildly. I don't think he ever really loved her and she loves everybody she dates.

It’s lack of sex, not the baby, which breaks the relationship.

Oh pls. Sex doesn't carry a long term marriage, lol.

Looking back at many of the people we've known I would say late 30's and 40's. All different reasons. One divorced her husband because he literally would not help with the kids. They both had f/t jobs. One wife cheated, but her life is crap. She's currently on her 2nd divorce. Her 1st husband is doing well. Many divorced over money problems, probably one of the biggest problems. Another couldn't stand her husbands family, kids from the first marriage, and finally divorced him. Marriage is hard no matter how you cut it. Loyalty, commitment, and compromise have to work in a marriage otherwise it will end in divorce, or unhappiness.

Nobody has said that sex carries a marriage.
But lack of sex absolutely 100% does destroy a marriage.
Want to know if you are headed for divorce? Check your sex life.

and what wrecks a sex life? losing respect for your spouse. maybe s/he deserves the loss of respect, maybe not.

marriage, raising kids, taking good care of yourself/spouse/kids/house -- all of that is hard hard work, 24/7/365.

when people say "Having kids will really change your life," they are not merely talking about you not getting a full nights sleep, having to wash bottles, and going around with a baby or toddler. they are talking about this is Test Time - THE ultimate test on how reliable, communicate able, hard-working, and good habits you and your spouse have. If one spouses fails to be reliable in life, respect is loss, who wants to have sex with a loser, marriage is unhappy for both. but scheduled sex with a loser is not going to fix anything, just build more resentment. Hard work and change for the better will, and will lead to sex again.

Yes. Lack of communication and unwilling to compromise with your spouse will lead to divorce. If you don't respect your spouse don't think the sex will happen.

Why are you married to an unreliable non-hardworking loser spouse whom don't respect and resent even the very idea of sex?!?
FILE FOR DIVORCE TODAY!
But..... if you stay with this horrible evil person... do not expect him to remain "faithful".

Don't know why you're projecting. If a loser is resorting to cheating it's time for him to find the door!

The PP described a horrible marriage to her lose husband who she doesn’t want sex with. If she can’t find the door then it’s defacto open marriage for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So far the only divorces I've seen in my circle of acquaintances are the starter marriage divorces. Those people got married to HS/college sweethearts and they lasted maybe 2-3 years. Some had kids, some didn't. Almost all went on to remarry and have kids and those marriages seem to be doing well.

The people I met in adulthood as already married all seem fine. I can think of one couple I am no longer friends with who are toxic people and might eventually divorce but I can say any of the rest of my group would be a shock if it happened.

Same here. The people who divorced in my circle are some of those that got married in their 20s. All remarried in their late 20s - early 30s, no divorces since then. We are in our mid-40s now.

[Anonymous]

Middle school for me.

[Anonymous]

Late middle school and early high school. Parents around 48-55.

Each and every one of them a shock!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid 40s to early 50s...big wave..most married 15 years+

This will be me

Coincides with last child off to college. You think to yourself, I have many years of life left, do I really want to spend it with this person?

[Anonymous]

One couple were married around 21/22 yrs old, 2 children who were in middle school at the time of the divorce. They divorced mid 30's.

Another married mid 20's, three young kids, divorced mid 30's as well. They had meddling in-laws and the wife suffered from depression.

We are coming into our 40's now. So time will tell.