My 30 something brother is homeless and is ruining everyone's lives

[Anonymous]

Op you are the enabler.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you tell your parents while they are watching your kids, they can't allow your brother to be there too. If they do, you will have to stop paying for their apartment and instead get a nanny. They can see your brother on their own time when your kids are not there.

Her kids can’t be with her parents. Full stop. Senior housing, nanny now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Your post reeks of ignorance about mental health issues and addiction. Addicts lie and steal. They are driven to it. They cannot help themselves. A lot end up dead.

These are FACTS. Don't judge him as you would judge a healthy person.

Now with these facts, your family should never have enabled him. It simply prolongs the pain. He should have been cut off a long time ago and directed to institutional help. Families cannot force addicted adults to seek help and treatment. They just need to let go, and it's incredibly painful, but your parents should have been educated and guided to do so.

You need to drag your parents to addict meetings and therapy so they can be persuaded to cut him off. You can also tell them that you will NOT support them if their money is going to your brother. You can do this by paying the rent directly to the landlord, and similar things. You must clearly explain to your brother that he is not welcome in your neighborhood and you do not want him around your family.

The end.

How do I drag them to meetings? They are adults too. I've told them they are enabling him and that they are just prolonging his problems and keeping him from getting well. My dad says he will "support his kids until he is broke or dead."

Right this down and give it to your dad. And then remind him that he is in fact broke, and has no money. So according to his own words, he will no linger support your brother,

Your parenTs don't seem to realize they are broke, they have no money to support themselves or their child.

They seem to lack an understanding of their own reality.

That is far more concerning.