Physically heterosexual but male entitlement has ruined it for me

[Anonymous]

This isn't about feminism. This is about a social awkward person who has struggled with her relationships with the opposite sex and uses "feminism" to rationalize it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This isn't about feminism. This is about a social awkward person who has struggled with her relationships with the opposite sex and uses "feminism" to rationalize it.

Women are "socially awkward" because we're tired of men asking for more than they give in relationships and tired that men expect to benefit from our free labor in that relationship, so tired that eventually we just feel like giving up interacting with them on an intimate personal level? That qualifies as "socially awkward"?

Are are people of color who get tired of explaining racism and defending against it also "socially awkward"?

Is "socially awkward" the new "blue-stocking" or "old maid" epitaph?

Women who ask for equality are often derided as social misfits, but I for one am glad for those misfits.

[Anonymous]

Thanks PP! I decided to retire from the thread after posting the book up there, but happy to see there are a few kindred spirits reading this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This isn't about feminism. This is about a social awkward person who has struggled with her relationships with the opposite sex and uses "feminism" to rationalize it.

Women are "socially awkward" because we're tired of men asking for more than they give in relationships and tired that men expect to benefit from our free labor in that relationship, so tired that eventually we just feel like giving up interacting with them on an intimate personal level? That qualifies as "socially awkward"?

Are are people of color who get tired of explaining racism and defending against it also "socially awkward"?

Is "socially awkward" the new "blue-stocking" or "old maid" epitaph?

Women who ask for equality are often derided as social misfits, but I for one am glad for those misfits.

Most women are not socially awkward. Most women have no problem getting along with the opposite sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most women have no problem getting along with the opposite sex.

This would not be the case if men had a weaker sex drive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most women have no problem getting along with the opposite sex.

This would not be the case if men had a weaker sex drive.

¿Que?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is the female equivalent of men who post on places like Reddit's Red Pill: bitter, social awkward young men who lack the ability to view themselves realistically and generalize women in the most inflammatory ways possible. OP would fit right in if she was born with a Y chromosome.

I'm actually pretty concerned about this and what it means for society in the long term and short term. Men and women both make out the opposite sex to be the root of all evil, projecting personal problems onto an entire group of people. It's sad. There are sex-based issues, of course. But the rampant generalizations and hostility are no good for actually solving any of those problems.

I worry about this too, but I think (perhaps wishful thinking) most people are sensible enough not to paint everyone with such a broad brush.

The Internet has made it easier for less reasonable, perspective-impaired, people to get on the soapbox. In the past, people like this would already be well known within their community as someone whose opinions tend to be a bit extreme and should be taken with a grain of salt. On the Internet, anonymity means that the village idiot has an equal standing with a thoughtful, empathic person.

Just replace "opposite sex" with other races or religions and you basically have the human condition. Some people are always predisposed towards aggressively judging the Other, however they define it.

True. It's just that I see it on mainstream sites as well- not just anonymous parenting boards where people work out their aggression- and it's troubling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women are "socially awkward" because we're tired of men asking for more than they give in relationships and tired that men expect to benefit from our free labor in that relationship, so tired that eventually we just feel like giving up interacting with them on an intimate personal level? That qualifies as "socially awkward"?

I'm a 50 year old man and I'm still looking for one of the free labor relationships that I always read about here. Didn't even get to have them when I was young, much less married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is the female equivalent of men who post on places like Reddit's Red Pill: bitter, social awkward young men who lack the ability to view themselves realistically and generalize women in the most inflammatory ways possible. OP would fit right in if she was born with a Y chromosome.

I'm actually pretty concerned about this and what it means for society in the long term and short term. Men and women both make out the opposite sex to be the root of all evil, projecting personal problems onto an entire group of people. It's sad. There are sex-based issues, of course. But the rampant generalizations and hostility are no good for actually solving any of those problems.

I worry about this too, but I think (perhaps wishful thinking) most people are sensible enough not to paint everyone with such a broad brush.

The Internet has made it easier for less reasonable, perspective-impaired, people to get on the soapbox. In the past, people like this would already be well known within their community as someone whose opinions tend to be a bit extreme and should be taken with a grain of salt. On the Internet, anonymity means that the village idiot has an equal standing with a thoughtful, empathic person.

Just replace "opposite sex" with other races or religions and you basically have the human condition. Some people are always predisposed towards aggressively judging the Other, however they define it.

True. It's just that I see it on mainstream sites as well- not just anonymous parenting boards where people work out their aggression- and it's troubling.

I think every gender (and religion, race, etc.) has its own challenges that aren't immediately obvious to people who are not members of their in-group. The Internet has made it easier for each of these groups to circle the wagons into their little echo chambers where discussions about how the in-group is being eternally victimized by the out-group. I think this is particularly noticeable in younger people (<30) where opinions and world views seem to be getting increasingly polarized along gender and racial lines, perhaps because they do not remember a time before the media fragmentation took off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is the female equivalent of men who post on places like Reddit's Red Pill: bitter, social awkward young men who lack the ability to view themselves realistically and generalize women in the most inflammatory ways possible. OP would fit right in if she was born with a Y chromosome.

I'm actually pretty concerned about this and what it means for society in the long term and short term. Men and women both make out the opposite sex to be the root of all evil, projecting personal problems onto an entire group of people. It's sad. There are sex-based issues, of course. But the rampant generalizations and hostility are no good for actually solving any of those problems.

I worry about this too, but I think (perhaps wishful thinking) most people are sensible enough not to paint everyone with such a broad brush.

The Internet has made it easier for less reasonable, perspective-impaired, people to get on the soapbox. In the past, people like this would already be well known within their community as someone whose opinions tend to be a bit extreme and should be taken with a grain of salt. On the Internet, anonymity means that the village idiot has an equal standing with a thoughtful, empathic person.

Just replace "opposite sex" with other races or religions and you basically have the human condition. Some people are always predisposed towards aggressively judging the Other, however they define it.

True. It's just that I see it on mainstream sites as well- not just anonymous parenting boards where people work out their aggression- and it's troubling.

I think every gender (and religion, race, etc.) has its own challenges that aren't immediately obvious to people who are not members of their in-group. The Internet has made it easier for each of these groups to circle the wagons into their little echo chambers where discussions about how the in-group is being eternally victimized by the out-group. I think this is particularly noticeable in younger people (<30) where opinions and world views seem to be getting increasingly polarized along gender and racial lines, perhaps because they do not remember a time before the media fragmentation took off.

The Internet ... such a bummer that it has allowed oppressed peoples to get together and share information about their oppression with each other and then share information about their oppression and how to fight it globally thru "fragmented" outlets like Facebook and Twitter.

If it weren't for the Internet maybe those oppressed people wouldn't be so unhappy.

Take women for instance, if it weren't for the Internet, no one would have even known about that rape trial where the rape victim's victim impact statement was released online. If she hadn't been able to share her pain with her little in group, she probably would have just told her story in court and accepted that 6 month sentence that swimmer guy got and everyone would have been much happier.

Damn internet and those young people who insist on using it to reach out to people they don't even know. It was so much better when us women could be beaten by our husbands and raped by our boyfriends in the privacy of our own homes and when we couldn't even tell anyone about it because all we had access to were telephones and face-to-face conversations. Women felt so much less fragmented and isolated back then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is the female equivalent of men who post on places like Reddit's Red Pill: bitter, social awkward young men who lack the ability to view themselves realistically and generalize women in the most inflammatory ways possible. OP would fit right in if she was born with a Y chromosome.

I'm actually pretty concerned about this and what it means for society in the long term and short term. Men and women both make out the opposite sex to be the root of all evil, projecting personal problems onto an entire group of people. It's sad. There are sex-based issues, of course. But the rampant generalizations and hostility are no good for actually solving any of those problems.

I worry about this too, but I think (perhaps wishful thinking) most people are sensible enough not to paint everyone with such a broad brush.

The Internet has made it easier for less reasonable, perspective-impaired, people to get on the soapbox. In the past, people like this would already be well known within their community as someone whose opinions tend to be a bit extreme and should be taken with a grain of salt. On the Internet, anonymity means that the village idiot has an equal standing with a thoughtful, empathic person.

Just replace "opposite sex" with other races or religions and you basically have the human condition. Some people are always predisposed towards aggressively judging the Other, however they define it.

True. It's just that I see it on mainstream sites as well- not just anonymous parenting boards where people work out their aggression- and it's troubling.

I think every gender (and religion, race, etc.) has its own challenges that aren't immediately obvious to people who are not members of their in-group. The Internet has made it easier for each of these groups to circle the wagons into their little echo chambers where discussions about how the in-group is being eternally victimized by the out-group. I think this is particularly noticeable in younger people (<30) where opinions and world views seem to be getting increasingly polarized along gender and racial lines, perhaps because they do not remember a time before the media fragmentation took off.

The Internet ... such a bummer that it has allowed oppressed peoples to get together and share information about their oppression with each other and then share information about their oppression and how to fight it globally thru "fragmented" outlets like Facebook and Twitter.

If it weren't for the Internet maybe those oppressed people wouldn't be so unhappy.

Take women for instance, if it weren't for the Internet, no one would have even known about that rape trial where the rape victim's victim impact statement was released online. If she hadn't been able to share her pain with her little in group, she probably would have just told her story in court and accepted that 6 month sentence that swimmer guy got and everyone would have been much happier.

Damn internet and those young people who insist on using it to reach out to people they don't even know. It was so much better when us women could be beaten by our husbands and raped by our boyfriends in the privacy of our own homes and when we couldn't even tell anyone about it because all we had access to were telephones and face-to-face conversations. Women felt so much less fragmented and isolated back then.

LOL sure nice try troll. Go back to your cave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is the female equivalent of men who post on places like Reddit's Red Pill: bitter, social awkward young men who lack the ability to view themselves realistically and generalize women in the most inflammatory ways possible. OP would fit right in if she was born with a Y chromosome.

I'm actually pretty concerned about this and what it means for society in the long term and short term. Men and women both make out the opposite sex to be the root of all evil, projecting personal problems onto an entire group of people. It's sad. There are sex-based issues, of course. But the rampant generalizations and hostility are no good for actually solving any of those problems.

I worry about this too, but I think (perhaps wishful thinking) most people are sensible enough not to paint everyone with such a broad brush.

The Internet has made it easier for less reasonable, perspective-impaired, people to get on the soapbox. In the past, people like this would already be well known within their community as someone whose opinions tend to be a bit extreme and should be taken with a grain of salt. On the Internet, anonymity means that the village idiot has an equal standing with a thoughtful, empathic person.

Just replace "opposite sex" with other races or religions and you basically have the human condition. Some people are always predisposed towards aggressively judging the Other, however they define it.

True. It's just that I see it on mainstream sites as well- not just anonymous parenting boards where people work out their aggression- and it's troubling.

I think every gender (and religion, race, etc.) has its own challenges that aren't immediately obvious to people who are not members of their in-group. The Internet has made it easier for each of these groups to circle the wagons into their little echo chambers where discussions about how the in-group is being eternally victimized by the out-group. I think this is particularly noticeable in younger people (<30) where opinions and world views seem to be getting increasingly polarized along gender and racial lines, perhaps because they do not remember a time before the media fragmentation took off.

The Internet ... such a bummer that it has allowed oppressed peoples to get together and share information about their oppression with each other and then share information about their oppression and how to fight it globally thru "fragmented" outlets like Facebook and Twitter.

If it weren't for the Internet maybe those oppressed people wouldn't be so unhappy.

Take women for instance, if it weren't for the Internet, no one would have even known about that rape trial where the rape victim's victim impact statement was released online. If she hadn't been able to share her pain with her little in group, she probably would have just told her story in court and accepted that 6 month sentence that swimmer guy got and everyone would have been much happier.

Damn internet and those young people who insist on using it to reach out to people they don't even know. It was so much better when us women could be beaten by our husbands and raped by our boyfriends in the privacy of our own homes and when we couldn't even tell anyone about it because all we had access to were telephones and face-to-face conversations. Women felt so much less fragmented and isolated back then.

LOL sure nice try troll. Go back to your cave.

Crap. You don't take me seriously, did you? I was, of course, being sarcastic in order to point out how ridiculous the PP at 20:16 was being....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think maybe this is the right thread to put this.

I ride the metro into DC every day and I'm constantly struck by the manspreading.

Here are all these women huddled in their seats with their bags squashed into their laps, making room beside them so someone else can have the seat next to them and not feel cramped. Even the fat ladies trying to shrink themselves into the confines of their seat.

And then here are the men -- not all of them, but oh so many -- who are silently messaging not to sit next to them because they cannot be contained to just one seat. Spreading out their legs, or sitting on the aisle seat while the window seat is empty.

I don't care if you're getting off at the next stop. Stand tf up then, and leave the seats free when it's rush hour and you don't want to be bothered.

And all the manspreading, because I guess your balls need their own seat.

In short, yes, men have a sense of entitlement that is even bigger than their apparently enormous balls when they're on the metro.

That is all.

I just sit right on down - ditto for the ladies putting their bags on the seat.
Ditto for the people sitting on the outside of the two seats - I just say 'excuse me and go on in'.

Come on ladies - just sit down.

[Anonymous]

You're not heterosexual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But I'm not alone. I have a rich life . . . just celibate, which is the point that started the thread.

So, what's the problem then? If you're happy, then go on and be happy. Men will go on just fine without you.

I agree with this.

At the end of the day, no woman is entitled to sex with a social conscious, feminist, intellectual, high earning man. In the same way no man is entitled to sex with a bombshell French model.

Every man is going to say something stupid, insensitive, or otherwise not PC. At their core, most of these men are solid guys who just need a smart woman to occasionally call them out on their foot-in-mouth syndrome. This is how I "got better" and evolved my views. It shouldn't be shocking to women that men are not the most intuitive.

This thread could have been written by any number of my colleagues, who are either single or divorced. Frankly, I have told them that they are setting themselves up for a lifetime of disappointment if you expect a man to be your EQ equivalent. It's just not going to happen.