Harvard, Yale "feeders"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRONG. The PP even know that four of the ten had PARENTS who went to Harvard! That's stalky as all get out.

It's a small class at a k-12 private school. PP has probably been attending endless school functions with half those parents for over a decade. Of course she knows where they went to college. Heck, she probably knows where they live, what they do for a living, and all sorts of other details. It's called knowing your kid's classmates.

I agree. You'd have to have your head in the sand not to know this stuff about the kids after so long. The school is not that big. How would you not know this information?

Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you what half their best friends' parents went to school and what they did for a living, and I certainly could recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Let me fix my typos:

Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Overall size of school is irrelevant. It's only something like 115-125 per grade in high school, so not too many families. I'm more surprised by your claim that your kids have had the same friends since 1st grade, but you don't know much about those friends or the parents. My kids are in middle school at a local private school, and I'm not a particularly engaged parent, but even I could tell you what all their friends' parents do and where most of them went to college. Maybe it's a size difference. I get the sense there are lots more parent activities at my kids' school than at our local public school, and because the classes and grades are so small, you can't help but spend a lot of time small talking with other parents. There's only so long you can talk about the weather and the Nats, so conversation naturally extends to other things. I guess if it's a public school with 200-300 kids in the grade, you'd be less likely to get to know other parents as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Overall size of school is irrelevant. It's only something like 115-125 per grade in high school, so not too many families. I'm more surprised by your claim that your kids have had the same friends since 1st grade, but you don't know much about those friends or the parents. My kids are in middle school at a local private school, and I'm not a particularly engaged parent, but even I could tell you what all their friends' parents do and where most of them went to college. Maybe it's a size difference. I get the sense there are lots more parent activities at my kids' school than at our local public school, and because the classes and grades are so small, you can't help but spend a lot of time small talking with other parents. There's only so long you can talk about the weather and the Nats, so conversation naturally extends to other things. I guess if it's a public school with 200-300 kids in the grade, you'd be less likely to get to know other parents as well.

There's another way of looking at it. Private school parents tend to be so uber competitive that they make it their business to know not only what their kids' classmates are doing but what their kids' classmates' parents do for a living and where they went to school. It's all about comparing to see how everyone measures up. I never said I didn't know "much" about my kids' friends or their parents. I know a lot; I'm just not interested in where they went to college or how much money they make or how many sports my kids' friends play. That's all trivial bs that says nothing about these people as people. I've been to hundreds of parties and events with my kids' friends and their parents and this stuff doesn't come up because none of us cares. This is why I couldn't imagine sending my kids to elite private schools and having to partake in such trivial bs competition and "show me your and I'll show you mine" with the other parents, even though we easily could have afforded it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There's another way of looking at it. Private school parents tend to be so uber competitive that they make it their business to know not only what their kids' classmates are doing but what their kids' classmates' parents do for a living and where they went to school. It's all about comparing to see how everyone measures up. I never said I didn't know "much" about my kids' friends or their parents. I know a lot; I'm just not interested in where they went to college or how much money they make or how many sports my kids' friends play. That's all trivial bs that says nothing about these people as people. I've been to hundreds of parties and events with my kids' friends and their parents and this stuff doesn't come up because none of us cares. This is why I couldn't imagine sending my kids to elite private schools and having to partake in such trivial bs competition and "show me your and I'll show you mine" with the other parents, even though we easily could have afforded it.

Jeez, are you trying to sound like a jackass? Maybe take it down a notch. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Overall size of school is irrelevant. It's only something like 115-125 per grade in high school, so not too many families. I'm more surprised by your claim that your kids have had the same friends since 1st grade, but you don't know much about those friends or the parents. My kids are in middle school at a local private school, and I'm not a particularly engaged parent, but even I could tell you what all their friends' parents do and where most of them went to college. Maybe it's a size difference. I get the sense there are lots more parent activities at my kids' school than at our local public school, and because the classes and grades are so small, you can't help but spend a lot of time small talking with other parents. There's only so long you can talk about the weather and the Nats, so conversation naturally extends to other things. I guess if it's a public school with 200-300 kids in the grade, you'd be less likely to get to know other parents as well.

There's another way of looking at it. Private school parents tend to be so uber competitive that they make it their business to know not only what their kids' classmates are doing but what their kids' classmates' parents do for a living and where they went to school. It's all about comparing to see how everyone measures up. I never said I didn't know "much" about my kids' friends or their parents. I know a lot; I'm just not interested in where they went to college or how much money they make or how many sports my kids' friends play. That's all trivial bs that says nothing about these people as people. I've been to hundreds of parties and events with my kids' friends and their parents and this stuff doesn't come up because none of us cares. This is why I couldn't imagine sending my kids to elite private schools and having to partake in such trivial bs competition and "show me your and I'll show you mine" with the other parents, even though we easily could have afforded it.

These are wild negative assumptions. I for one know where my friends work, including fellow parents, because our jobs are important to must of us and many if us have professional interests and friends in common. Nothing competitive or ill-willed about it. Do you and such negative assumptions about everyone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Overall size of school is irrelevant. It's only something like 115-125 per grade in high school, so not too many families. I'm more surprised by your claim that your kids have had the same friends since 1st grade, but you don't know much about those friends or the parents. My kids are in middle school at a local private school, and I'm not a particularly engaged parent, but even I could tell you what all their friends' parents do and where most of them went to college. Maybe it's a size difference. I get the sense there are lots more parent activities at my kids' school than at our local public school, and because the classes and grades are so small, you can't help but spend a lot of time small talking with other parents. There's only so long you can talk about the weather and the Nats, so conversation naturally extends to other things. I guess if it's a public school with 200-300 kids in the grade, you'd be less likely to get to know other parents as well.

Creepy. And very DC for people to be obsessed with undergrad pedigrees. Ugh. Very 21st century SFS too, sad to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Creepy. And very DC for people to be obsessed with undergrad pedigrees. Ugh. Very 21st century SFS too, sad to say.

No, it's not obsession with anything. It's simply being willing to talk with people and learn something about them. Maybe you should try listening to other people for a change, rather than spending all your time judging them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is both sad and silly. Sad that any parent would research Harvard "feeder" schools for their child, and silly in that there is just no such thing as a "feeder" anymore. There are just too many factors in play, and as a previous poster said, the pool from which colleges draw is just so much larger than it was 20 years ago. I would never get into the college I attended (Yale) now. And my children almost certainly won't either, despite the fact that they are exceptionally bright, attend an excellent school, and have five generations of HYP in both my and my husband's families. And you know what? I don't care. They will get a great education at a great college (of which there are many besides HYP) and hopefully go on to lead happy, productive and fulfilling lives.

Everybody just needs to relax and stop fantasizing about their kids going to Harvard. It's stupid.

I agree with your opinions, but I'm curious why you think your kids wouldn't get into HYP if they tried?

It's because from the point of view of college admissions staff, who probably review hundreds of applications a day, there are a lot of children just like mine - bright, well-educated white kids who attend a top DC private and whose parents are the highly educated products of elite Ivy League colleges. My children are wonderful and will be a terrific part of whatever college community they join. But realistically, if I worked in the admissions office at Harvard, I'd be far more interested in the straight-A daughter of Afghan refugees who live in Michigan, or the multilingual son of a powerful Chinese family, or the Latina from a working-class family in Florida who is the first in her family to attend college. Twenty years ago, college admissions officers rarely saw applications from these kids. Now they do - and it's a good thing.

I like you, PP.

[Anonymous]

OK, so even though I am one of the more laid back parents, so on one hand I don't really care who knows what about whom, I am going to defend the PP who knows the Yale students parents' occupations and alma maters, and claims that few are legacies. I find the parents at Sidwell very friendly and supportive. In US there are lots of activities where you work with other parents and get to know them quite well. I have formed several lasting friendships with other parents.The fact that we get FA has never come up, but I assume most of the parents know this because we are of modest means. In US parents may also travel on a "shadow tour" when certain groups go overseas or to fun places in the the US. When you travel together with parents of kids who have similar interests as your kid you get to know quite a bit about them. So its very possible for someone to know how many of the kids going to Yale are legacies without being creepy or intrusive. Over the years you pick up your kids at many parents houses, form car pools to games, etc. There is a lot of parental contact. Many Sidwell parents may be"well connected" but the parental atmosphere around the school is very friendly and helpful. Strangely the tension comes if you as a parent want to discuss something with a teacher. This is frowned upon in the US and many of the parents will sympathize with you and tell you their similar experiences in dealing with teachers. Sidwell certainly is not a feeder to Yale or any other school, but my observation is that every single kid gets into a good college, so the school must be doing something right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's another way of looking at it. Private school parents tend to be so uber competitive that they make it their business to know not only what their kids' classmates are doing but what their kids' classmates' parents do for a living and where they went to school. It's all about comparing to see how everyone measures up. I never said I didn't know "much" about my kids' friends or their parents. I know a lot; I'm just not interested in where they went to college or how much money they make or how many sports my kids' friends play. That's all trivial bs that says nothing about these people as people. I've been to hundreds of parties and events with my kids' friends and their parents and this stuff doesn't come up because none of us cares. This is why I couldn't imagine sending my kids to elite private schools and having to partake in such trivial bs competition and "show me your and I'll show you mine" with the other parents, even though we easily could have afforded it.

Jeez, are you trying to sound like a jackass? Maybe take it down a notch. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder.

THIS is the reaction one gets every single time one questions the values of education and pedigree obsessed parents. "You must be jealous." It never occurs to the private school jackasses to do a little introspection and ask themselves what's really meaningful and what isn't.

[Anonymous]

I am sending my kids to a Big 3 because I think their chances of getting into HYP are very low and I want to make sure they have a good education every step of the way. There are no feeders in D.C.

http://www.thecrimson.com/article/2013/12/13/making-harvard-feeder-schools/

http://www.thecrimson.com/article/2015/4/1/regular-admissions-class-2019/

[Anonymous]

"Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall." To be clear, Sidwell has about 600 kids in the high school, which is pretty small. The 1200 students includes kids pk-8.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's another way of looking at it. Private school parents tend to be so uber competitive that they make it their business to know not only what their kids' classmates are doing but what their kids' classmates' parents do for a living and where they went to school. It's all about comparing to see how everyone measures up. I never said I didn't know "much" about my kids' friends or their parents. I know a lot; I'm just not interested in where they went to college or how much money they make or how many sports my kids' friends play. That's all trivial bs that says nothing about these people as people. I've been to hundreds of parties and events with my kids' friends and their parents and this stuff doesn't come up because none of us cares. This is why I couldn't imagine sending my kids to elite private schools and having to partake in such trivial bs competition and "show me your and I'll show you mine" with the other parents, even though we easily could have afforded it.

Jeez, are you trying to sound like a jackass? Maybe take it down a notch. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder.

THIS is the reaction one gets every single time one questions the values of education and pedigree obsessed parents. "You must be jealous." It never occurs to the private school jackasses to do a little introspection and ask themselves what's really meaningful and what isn't.

No, it's the reaction you get when you use ridiculous stereotypes to broad-brush denigrate thousands of people you don't know anything about. I'm done with this pointless exchange. You can have the last word, so flame away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sidwell is not THAT small. It's 1200 students overall. And while my kids went to bigger, public schools they largely had the same friends from first grade on, and I have to tell you: I couldn't tell you where half their best friends' parents went to school (then again other classmates' parents) and what they did for a living, and I certainly could not recite every extracurricular activity in which the friends engaged. And I was a very involved parent.

Some of us have a life beyond our children's schooling.

Overall size of school is irrelevant. It's only something like 115-125 per grade in high school, so not too many families. I'm more surprised by your claim that your kids have had the same friends since 1st grade, but you don't know much about those friends or the parents. My kids are in middle school at a local private school, and I'm not a particularly engaged parent, but even I could tell you what all their friends' parents do and where most of them went to college. Maybe it's a size difference. I get the sense there are lots more parent activities at my kids' school than at our local public school, and because the classes and grades are so small, you can't help but spend a lot of time small talking with other parents. There's only so long you can talk about the weather and the Nats, so conversation naturally extends to other things. I guess if it's a public school with 200-300 kids in the grade, you'd be less likely to get to know other parents as well.

Creepy. And very DC for people to be obsessed with undergrad pedigrees. Ugh. Very 21st century SFS too, sad to say.

How do you hold the two thoughts simultaneously in your tiny brain? That the majority of kids admitted were legacies, on obvious reference to and obsession with parent's school history on you part, and for the disputer of your statement as being obsessed with undergrad pedigree. I don't get it. Perhaps you can explain your reasoning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Creepy. And very DC for people to be obsessed with undergrad pedigrees. Ugh. Very 21st century SFS too, sad to say.

No, it's not obsession with anything. It's simply being willing to talk with people and learn something about them. Maybe you should try listening to other people for a change, rather than spending all your time judging them.

I'm 50. I haven't said "where'd you go undergrad" in social situations for about 25 years. Sorry, the person who knows the undergraduate pedigrees of all fellow parents is obsessed.