Any married AA moms keep maiden name?

[Anonymous]

AA wife/mother. I kept my last name when I married for professional reasons and bc I like the name. The thought of what other people think about my children has never crossed my mind. Those who know me know I'm married. I don't care what others think. In a few instances I have put my married name in parentheses after my first and last name to make it clear on things like applications and such.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AA wife/mother. I kept my last name when I married for professional reasons and bc I like the name. The thought of what other people think about my children has never crossed my mind. Those who know me know I'm married. I don't care what others think. In a few instances I have put my married name in parentheses after my first and last name to make it clear on things like applications and such.

I like this idea. Or just tacking on DHs name legally, but not professionally

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of race it is much easier for the family and children if the parent's have the same last name. No uncomfortable explanations, assumptions etc...

+1 worked fine for Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton , they are more famous and important than any silly dcum working woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a number of AA moms who kept their maiden name including myself. I didn't want the hassle of changing, felt I was a person in my own right, and was used to my own name.

Wait, taking your husband's name makes you less of person in your own right? What an interesting and completely WRONG idea.

to a certain extent you do become another person when you adopt somebody else's last name. you grow up Mary Brown, go to elementary, middle and high school, make tons of friends, go to college, move from one town to another, have a career and all of a sudden, at 35, you become Mary McCarthy. but for all the people who ever met you from birth on you are Mary Brown and Mary McCarthy is a stranger. your current good friends will know, but others will not. professionally, it can be difficult, in many other countries women do not change their last name, so if your career involves contacts will people abroad, changing name will not help you.

ask your husband to change his name to yours, and then you will see how suddenly keeping one's own name become important.

Yeah, no, sorry. I'm the same person. And professionally I'm fine, and I do quite a bit of business overseas. Shockingly enough, my contacts are educated enough to know that lots of Americans change their names! It sounds like you have issues.

New poster. PP does not have issues. Names are tied to identity. Giving up your name means giving up part of your identity. And I agree--if there is no loss involved in changing your name, why don't you see husbands eager to do it?

Obviously, because social/cultural penalty is higher for men to do this, beyond the practical considerations.