Unstuck and on Target Saturday Social skills group at Ivymount school

[Anonymous]

<<He really needs a social skills program this year but it looks like they only want the "very cooperative, highly verbal, wonderful" kids. Not the kids who really need a program like this. >>

Still baffled by this. Why does Ivymount run a $2500 social skills group for kids who don't apparantly need a social skills group? More important, why are their parents paying for it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are doing Unstuck and On target this spring too. I think Ivymount staff was absolutely lovely. They do want very cooperative, highly verbal children though. All the children at the "meet and greet" were wonderful (from this parent's perspective.) I did notice one who was not as verbal as the others, and one who was not as cooperative. So one was shy? And the other gregarious?

Luckily my child fit the profile they were looking for, but DC is a bit older too. So do not give up, I think these children were a little young for the program. Also although, curious and verbal I could see how one of the DC could be difficult to engage in a group. He just did not follow any of the instructor's instructions. He could not walk down the hallway without being redirected multiple times.

Sorry, but to be in a group you have to be able to self regulate better.

I thought this group was for children with autism who needed help with social skills, lol. "Very cooperative, highly verbal and wonderful" are usually not the first descriptors that pop to mind.

+1000. LOL! NWhy do kids who are "very cooperative, highly verbal and wonderful" NEED a social skills group?!?

Maybe they need a different social skill set than those who are less cooperative and verbal (though I am betting not a bit less wonderful). Many HFA kids easily slip through the cracks. They are presumed competent in the social skills arena until they do something unexpected and then are suddenly ostracized. I'm not trying to humble-brag HFA (a la "You have no idea how hard it is to have a gifted child") because the challenges are not even on the same page as other parts of the autism spectrum. But they're real challenges, and Unstuck was designed by a parent (Monica) and the Ivymount team because nothing previously existed that addressed this segment. Because my child looks and acts typical in most settings, when his behavior is out of the ordinary the other kids know, react, and then brush him off entirely.

During one of my years at the camp, they accepted one or two children younger than the stated age range, and those kids were disruptive. It may seem unfair, but the program works with a certain population and that's what they specialize in.

[Anonymous]

What these professionals won't say when they reject the disruptive, inattentive, or hyper kids is they are waiting for the parents to medicate them before they are willing to deal with them. (Risperdal, ADHD meds, etc).

No one wants the hassle of a difficult kid if they can fill the slot with a compliant "wonderful" kid.

[Anonymous]

No one is saying that Ivymount can't reject kids from a program where they are a "bad fit".

But sending an acceptance and then rescinding it later... not very nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
<<He really needs a social skills program this year but it looks like they only want the "very cooperative, highly verbal, wonderful" kids. Not the kids who really need a program like this. >>

Still baffled by this. Why does Ivymount run a $2500 social skills group for kids who don't apparantly need a social skills group? More important, why are their parents paying for it?

Not sure but Unstuck thinks their 50k-80k school will be better able to meet our son's needs and we should consider it instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
<<He really needs a social skills program this year but it looks like they only want the "very cooperative, highly verbal, wonderful" kids. Not the kids who really need a program like this. >>

Still baffled by this. Why does Ivymount run a $2500 social skills group for kids who don't apparantly need a social skills group? More important, why are their parents paying for it?

Not sure but Unstuck thinks their 50k-80k school will be better able to meet our son's needs and we should consider it instead.

I don't know your kid, of course, but my understanding is that MAP is "school of last resort" for highly verbal/intelligent kids on the spectrum who have behavior issues, because it's one of the few schools that can handle behaviors. So if your kid is currently showing behavior problems, I can see why they'd think MAP is a good fit. They might not know that the behavior problems are because his IEP isn't being followed or are temporary for another reason.

But regardless, having an acceptance be rescinded is nasty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
<<He really needs a social skills program this year but it looks like they only want the "very cooperative, highly verbal, wonderful" kids. Not the kids who really need a program like this. >>

Still baffled by this. Why does Ivymount run a $2500 social skills group for kids who don't apparantly need a social skills group? More important, why are their parents paying for it?

Not sure but Unstuck thinks their 50k-80k school will be better able to meet our son's needs and we should consider it instead.

I don't know your kid, of course, but my understanding is that MAP is "school of last resort" for highly verbal/intelligent kids on the spectrum who have behavior issues, because it's one of the few schools that can handle behaviors. So if your kid is currently showing behavior problems, I can see why they'd think MAP is a good fit. They might not know that the behavior problems are because his IEP isn't being followed or are temporary for another reason.

But regardless, having an acceptance be rescinded is nasty.

Your understanding from exactly who? Source(s). Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
<<He really needs a social skills program this year but it looks like they only want the "very cooperative, highly verbal, wonderful" kids. Not the kids who really need a program like this. >>

Still baffled by this. Why does Ivymount run a $2500 social skills group for kids who don't apparantly need a social skills group? More important, why are their parents paying for it?

Not sure but Unstuck thinks their 50k-80k school will be better able to meet our son's needs and we should consider it instead.

I don't know your kid, of course, but my understanding is that MAP is "school of last resort" for highly verbal/intelligent kids on the spectrum who have behavior issues, because it's one of the few schools that can handle behaviors. So if your kid is currently showing behavior problems, I can see why they'd think MAP is a good fit. They might not know that the behavior problems are because his IEP isn't being followed or are temporary for another reason.

But regardless, having an acceptance be rescinded is nasty.

So instead of a weekend social skills program, they recommend a "school of last resort" in the MOST restrictive environment that just about everyone goes through due process to get the funding for is a viable alternate to a weekend social skills group?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are doing Unstuck and On target this spring too. I think Ivymount staff was absolutely lovely. They do want very cooperative, highly verbal children though. All the children at the "meet and greet" were wonderful (from this parent's perspective.) I did notice one who was not as verbal as the others, and one who was not as cooperative. So one was shy? And the other gregarious?

Luckily my child fit the profile they were looking for, but DC is a bit older too. So do not give up, I think these children were a little young for the program. Also although, curious and verbal I could see how one of the DC could be difficult to engage in a group. He just did not follow any of the instructor's instructions. He could not walk down the hallway without being redirected multiple times.

Sorry, but to be in a group you have to be able to self regulate better.

I think for a school that profits from tax dollars (public payments for private schools) and has a mission to teach children with autism -- it is incredibly shitty to cherry-pick the "cream of the autism crop" for your $$$$ social skills groups, and then trumpet to the world how great your social skills groups are.

What about all the children who aren't compliant and pleasant enough to make the cut? The kids who really need the social skills therapy. If they aren't getting it here, then where and how? I hate the writing off of the outliers. (And my dc doesn't even have autism.)

Please provide proof that Ivymount "profits."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are doing Unstuck and On target this spring too. I think Ivymount staff was absolutely lovely. They do want very cooperative, highly verbal children though. All the children at the "meet and greet" were wonderful (from this parent's perspective.) I did notice one who was not as verbal as the others, and one who was not as cooperative. So one was shy? And the other gregarious?

Luckily my child fit the profile they were looking for, but DC is a bit older too. So do not give up, I think these children were a little young for the program. Also although, curious and verbal I could see how one of the DC could be difficult to engage in a group. He just did not follow any of the instructor's instructions. He could not walk down the hallway without being redirected multiple times.

Sorry, but to be in a group you have to be able to self regulate better.

I think for a school that profits from tax dollars (public payments for private schools) and has a mission to teach children with autism -- it is incredibly shitty to cherry-pick the "cream of the autism crop" for your $$$$ social skills groups, and then trumpet to the world how great your social skills groups are.

What about all the children who aren't compliant and pleasant enough to make the cut? The kids who really need the social skills therapy. If they aren't getting it here, then where and how? I hate the writing off of the outliers. (And my dc doesn't even have autism.)

Good grief! This is ONE program. ONE program designed for a certain subset of kids with HFA with families wealthy enough to afford it. Its success rate is high because it address specific needs. In my small town alone there are at least three different therapy practices offering social skills for kids as young as toddlers and as old as high school. Ask your developmental pediatrician for some recommendations or referrals. Call CNMC or KKI. Contact Stixrud or Weinfeld. Join autism listservs. Fairfax County rolled out Unstuck in certain schools a few years ago. There are options; I know it's hard to find them but they are out there.



Please provide proof that Ivymount "profits."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This does seem out of line. Sorry OP. Glad to hear your son is liking school more these days at least. Sounds like a series of issues compounding!

There is only one developmental pediatrician who gets so involved with schools so I think I can guess who it is.

Yes... series of issues is an understatement.

Our developmental pediatrician spoke to Monica, head of MAP, about our kid before we ever even saw the school. The irony being that once we visited and took a tour, we decided not to apply to MAP or ask for public funding!

Usually a parent visits the school, decided to apply and then the developmental pediatrician/advocate contacts the school but our HIPAA violating doctor really overstepped his role and a school who we have no interest in having our kid attend knows a lot about him that they really have no business knowing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This does seem out of line. Sorry OP. Glad to hear your son is liking school more these days at least. Sounds like a series of issues compounding!

There is only one developmental pediatrician who gets so involved with schools so I think I can guess who it is.

Yes... series of issues is an understatement.

Our developmental pediatrician spoke to Monica, head of MAP, about our kid before we ever even saw the school. The irony being that once we visited and took a tour, we decided not to apply to MAP or ask for public funding!

Usually a parent visits the school, decided to apply and then the developmental pediatrician/advocate contacts the school but our HIPAA violating doctor really overstepped his role and a school who we have no interest in having our kid attend knows a lot about him that they really have no business knowing.

So where did you kid end up? Did the full funding materialize from your school system for the school your DC attends? Did you file a complaint about your doctor?

[Anonymous]

your kid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This does seem out of line. Sorry OP. Glad to hear your son is liking school more these days at least. Sounds like a series of issues compounding!

There is only one developmental pediatrician who gets so involved with schools so I think I can guess who it is.

Yes... series of issues is an understatement.

Our developmental pediatrician spoke to Monica, head of MAP, about our kid before we ever even saw the school. The irony being that once we visited and took a tour, we decided not to apply to MAP or ask for public funding!

Usually a parent visits the school, decided to apply and then the developmental pediatrician/advocate contacts the school but our HIPAA violating doctor really overstepped his role and a school who we have no interest in having our kid attend knows a lot about him that they really have no business knowing.

So where did you kid end up? Did the full funding materialize from your school system for the school your DC attends? Did you file a complaint about your doctor?

All this except for the rescinding of our acceptance for Unstuck happened in November. Our doctor thought a midyear placement into MAP was necessary

The behavior plan which our current school's BCBA came up with was implemented Dec. 1. So far, DS is doing well, all the very problematic behaviors are completely gone. Yesterday, DS got 84 points out of a possible 92 in his behavior chart and that's been pretty consistent day to day so far.

We also got his report card over the weekend and he is doing very well academically across the board.

No, I haven't filed a complaint about our former doctor because I knows he acted in what he thought was my child's best interest although his "help" basically made our situation 100x worse than it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This does seem out of line. Sorry OP. Glad to hear your son is liking school more these days at least. Sounds like a series of issues compounding!

There is only one developmental pediatrician who gets so involved with schools so I think I can guess who it is.

Yes... series of issues is an understatement.

Our developmental pediatrician spoke to Monica, head of MAP, about our kid before we ever even saw the school. The irony being that once we visited and took a tour, we decided not to apply to MAP or ask for public funding!

Usually a parent visits the school, decided to apply and then the developmental pediatrician/advocate contacts the school but our HIPAA violating doctor really overstepped his role and a school who we have no interest in having our kid attend knows a lot about him that they really have no business knowing.

So where did you kid end up? Did the full funding materialize from your school system for the school your DC attends? Did you file a complaint about your doctor?

All this except for the rescinding of our acceptance for Unstuck happened in November. Our doctor thought a midyear placement into MAP was necessary

The behavior plan which our current school's BCBA came up with was implemented Dec. 1. So far, DS is doing well, all the very problematic behaviors are completely gone. Yesterday, DS got 84 points out of a possible 92 in his behavior chart and that's been pretty consistent day to day so far.

We also got his report card over the weekend and he is doing very well academically across the board.

No, I haven't filed a complaint about our former doctor because I know he acted in what he thought was my child's best interest although his "help" basically made our situation 100x worse than it was.

Corrected a typo b/c my DH is making fun of me