What's the best quality in a husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kindness. I think integrity and many other qualities go along with it. If you are kind, you don't cheat on your wife. If you are having a hard time with something, in your kindness you deal with it directly. When you are kind, you are not thinking only of yourself. I don't know many kind, unethical people (can't think of a one).

I like this answer.

I disagree about this. Even a kind person can get caught up in bad actions (particularly cheating).

My answer is a basic respect for others and treating others with respect, even when the chips are down. My spouse respects me and my needs (and tries to help me meet them), and treats our children, friends, and everyone else we encounter with respect. Often this looks like kindness, I think. And if things ever go bad between us, I am confident that we would handle that with respect for each other as well.

Kindness and respect go hand in hand. Someone who is kind or respectful doesn't cheat. Cheating is lying, stealing, betraying, hurting others. That is a choice made from a place where there is no kindness, respect or integrity. Women don't slip and fall onto a penis like it is an accident and men don't trip and land in a vagina. It is choice made and no different than lying, stealing and cheating in business or lying and cheating and betraying in any other capacity. A kind and respectful person doesn't get caught up in those types of situations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Kindness and respect go hand in hand. Someone who is kind or respectful doesn't cheat. Cheating is lying, stealing, betraying, hurting others. That is a choice made from a place where there is no kindness, respect or integrity. Women don't slip and fall onto a penis like it is an accident and men don't trip and land in a vagina. It is choice made and no different than lying, stealing and cheating in business or lying and cheating and betraying in any other capacity. A kind and respectful person doesn't get caught up in those types of situations.

Amen.

I am a man and Kindness/Respect is at the top of my list when it comes to women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Kindness and respect go hand in hand. Someone who is kind or respectful doesn't cheat. Cheating is lying, stealing, betraying, hurting others. That is a choice made from a place where there is no kindness, respect or integrity. Women don't slip and fall onto a penis like it is an accident and men don't trip and land in a vagina. It is choice made and no different than lying, stealing and cheating in business or lying and cheating and betraying in any other capacity. A kind and respectful person doesn't get caught up in those types of situations.

Amen.

I am a man and Kindness/Respect is at the top of my list when it comes to women.

Once again, qualities you'd want from a FRIEND, which is the bare minimum requirements. And I don't mean that in a negative light. But for your spouse, sexual compatibility is still key. Without it, people question their own integrity – "Why do I do everything right and get no or bad sex, while other people doing questionable things get kinky sex?"

Being a good person does by yield good sexual results (or any other good results). So be EVERYTHING or, in your case, look for everything in the man you want.

[Anonymous]

?^^^?
Being a good person does NOT yield...

[Anonymous]

I would say
(1) chemistry
(2) total personal commitment to me (and more than fidelity, I mean a commitment to making the marriage work - even if there is infidelity)

[Anonymous]

Hmm, I know kind and respectful people who have cheated. Anyone can have weakness or clouded judgment during a rough patch in a marriage.

A good point is made about the importance of chemistry. I think it's more emotional chemistry than just physical. My ex was wonderful in every way as a person and friend, but emotionally something was missing, so I discovered after many years of trying to make it work, that at least for me, everything else without passion was not enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hmm, I know kind and respectful people who have cheated. Anyone can have weakness or clouded judgment during a rough patch in a marriage.

A good point is made about the importance of chemistry. I think it's more emotional chemistry than just physical. My ex was wonderful in every way as a person and friend, but emotionally something was missing, so I discovered after many years of trying to make it work, that at least for me, everything else without passion was not enough.

I'm sorry but a respectful person does not cheat on their spouse. They may play the respectful role real well, but deep down they don't respect someone by cheating on them. I don't care if it is a rough patch or a drunken night. If you respect your spouse, you don't cheat. Ever. Period. There is no hall passes for being respectful.

Nobody is perfect. But when it comes down to infidelity, you are not a respectful person.

[Anonymous]

So, if you treat your spouse's needs as if they don't matter, isn't that, too, disrespectful?

The person harping on fidelity as the main quality denoting respect is probably a "low driver."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, if you treat your spouse's needs as if they don't matter, isn't that, too, disrespectful?

The person harping on fidelity as the main quality denoting respect is probably a "low driver."

Yes. Not putting forth effort in a marriage/relationship in disrespectful IMO

[Anonymous]

Marriages are different. For one couple, or one person, fidelity might be everything. Honestly, we are all human beings capable of making terrible mistakes.

[Anonymous]

Kindness and respect are often incompatible with "chemistry." Chemistry often requires a certain amount of emotional friction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Kindness and respect go hand in hand. Someone who is kind or respectful doesn't cheat. Cheating is lying, stealing, betraying, hurting others. That is a choice made from a place where there is no kindness, respect or integrity. Women don't slip and fall onto a penis like it is an accident and men don't trip and land in a vagina. It is choice made and no different than lying, stealing and cheating in business or lying and cheating and betraying in any other capacity. A kind and respectful person doesn't get caught up in those types of situations.

Bullseye.

[Anonymous]

a long tongue...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Kindness and respect go hand in hand. Someone who is kind or respectful doesn't cheat. Cheating is lying, stealing, betraying, hurting others. That is a choice made from a place where there is no kindness, respect or integrity. Women don't slip and fall onto a penis like it is an accident and men don't trip and land in a vagina. It is choice made and no different than lying, stealing and cheating in business or lying and cheating and betraying in any other capacity. A kind and respectful person doesn't get caught up in those types of situations.

Amen.

I am a man and Kindness/Respect is at the top of my list when it comes to women.

A second Amen.

[Anonymous]

An equity partnership.