my 8 month old is an asshole.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP,
I think what happens is that you assume your baby is more advanced and developed than she really is. She is not 3 or 4 y.o., she is merely 8 months old. She just learned that she can express her wishes and desires, but is not capable of regulating herself when these wishes are rejected. She does not yet understand that you might be busy to cater to her, she does not know that when you don't want solids you say "no thank you" and so on. She is upset (rightfully so), because she does not get what she want. Plus, as adults, we have more freedom to get what we want, make decisions, etc. She does not have these freedoms yet and you are her outlet to make her desires happen. Try to be compassionate, see how tiny she still is, imagine that her brain development and is on par with her physical development and cut her some slack. Also, make someone babysit and relax. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope OP has learned her lesson about saying things in jest or seeking support on this forum.

Oh, please. She would have received plenty of helpful responses if she had simply refrained from calling her BABY an asshole.

Chill out. Her BABY doesn't ready DCUM so I'm sure she wasn't insulted. It was a JOKE. You must be so boring to be around.

If by boring you mean adult enough not to refer to my child as an asshole, bitch or dick, then yes - I'm incredibly boring.

I am probably 20 years younger than you are, so it wouldn't surprise me if that has something to do with different ideas about language. I don't even say "that sucks" around my grandparents because I realize it means something different to them. I did not realize it would be a big deal to some AMA moms on here.

FWIW, I would never call my child a bitch or a dick. That would just be crude.

Ah, it's a big deal to the AMA moms? So what, you're 20 years old? That is not surprising. Go back to being on teen mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope OP has learned her lesson about saying things in jest or seeking support on this forum.

Oh, please. She would have received plenty of helpful responses if she had simply refrained from calling her BABY an asshole.

Chill out. Her BABY doesn't ready DCUM so I'm sure she wasn't insulted. It was a JOKE. You must be so boring to be around.

If by boring you mean adult enough not to refer to my child as an asshole, bitch or dick, then yes - I'm incredibly boring.

I am probably 20 years younger than you are, so it wouldn't surprise me if that has something to do with different ideas about language. I don't even say "that sucks" around my grandparents because I realize it means something different to them. I did not realize it would be a big deal to some AMA moms on here.

FWIW, I would never call my child a bitch or a dick. That would just be crude.

So explain to me then (you know, the uptight older mom) how asshole is okay, but bitch or dick is not?

Because they are insults that are tied to gender. Asshole is universal.

Well, that is certainly an interesting bit of mental gymnastics there.

[Anonymous]

This is a troll post.

[Anonymous]

Just wait until she starts talking and walking and having opinions of her own. It is like having a whole other person. Oh wait, she is another person that you created. Pace yourself Mama...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She was a PERFECT baby from the very beginning. Great nurser, sweet temperament, happy to play or to just sit by herself, slept through the night at just a few weeks old, etc., etc. Now at 8 months that has all changed. She wakes up in the night for no apparent reason other than wanting to be held or wanting to scream. She gets mad when it's naptime. She will eat solids only if she is fed; anything else is immediately thrown on the floor. She whines constantly if I am not doing exactly what she wants at any given moment. I have gotten really fed up with her a few times and yelled or slammed an object down in exasperation and she just laughed (better than whining, at least). Are most 8 month olds like this? Am I going to see my sweet, happy little girl again or is she just going to be difficult from here on out?

Not so typical at 8 months. Are you sure she is OK eating wise? This is a time of tremendous hunger. Perhaps her food does not agree with her? She has no other way to let you know than scream or whine. Please ask your ped. Mine did this also and had food problems. I realized that I was burping her so hard I thought she might break. All that crying...she was in pain.

[Anonymous]

She is 22-23 lbs and seems to be doing really well with nursing whether she gets solids or not. She is definitely not fussy most of the time. She hasn't cried once today, for example, so I don't think she is in pain. She just seems to be so strong-willed lately and I am not at all used to the whining or meltdowns when she doesn't think it should be naptime or doesn't think she should have to play with toys and not my smartphone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, your posts are strange. Your first post talks about how your perfect baby never caused you any trouble and now you're yelling and throwing things because your baby is an asshole, and you get upset because people criticize this, so you respond that you're never moody and you just threw a diaper and you just love your baby to pieces and you make motherhood look so easy...no, people here don't know you, only what you post, and frankly, your posts are inconsistent and defensive. What do you want from people? Reassurance that your the perfect mother and your baby will soon be easy and perfect again?

I was just hoping this is a phase that others have gone through. I think those who have suggested my baby is bored or going through a trying time developmentally are probably right, and that I need to adjust my expectations. She is only 8 months and I am seeing glimpses of bratty toddler in her, and given how angelic she has been up until now, it is a little frightening. I will deal with it, though. She is still happy and delightful to be around most of the time, but the little bit of attitude (this is where the word asshole comes into play), is going to take some getting used to. Thanks to those who have given good advice! I appreciate it.

Dr. Brazelton talks in Discipline: the Brazleton Way about how discipline really starts around 8 months when you start teaching safety and table manners. I've also seen it referenced in a few places that toddler pickiness with food can start around now. So in some ways 8 months does give you little glimpses of the toddler years - but they're just little glimpses.

But I really wouldn't look at it as attitude. She's letting you know she doesn't like something - you may not always be able to figure out what. She's not getting all sassy and snapping her fingers in your face.

[Anonymous]

I will have to read that. Discipline seemed like such a far-off thing I hadn't even begun to think about it.

She just crawled halfway across the living room for the first time, so I am going to go be a proud mama now. Thanks for all your help!

[Anonymous]

Separation anxiety peaks from 6-9 months. My eight month old wants to be held constantly right now too. It's very inconvenient but also super cute at the same time. Though she fights the jumperoo she's usually happy once I make it start playing some music. It should get better soon.

[Anonymous]

Who calls her kid an asshole? Really? She's 8 months old. She's just figuring stuff out. Give her some time.

[Anonymous]

I think this thread should just die. I find it unbelievable that someone would call their child an asshole, at whatever age. You were lucky to have a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this thread should just die. I find it unbelievable that someone would call their child an asshole, at whatever age. You were lucky to have a child.

No one asked for advice from the infertile crowd.

[Anonymous]

If u r yelling amd slamming now, u will be screaming and threatening and spanking down the road. Get some help now, at least read books like Touchpoint by Brazelton so u can see what's completely normal developmentally.

[Anonymous]

The Discipline Book by Sears and Sears is also a gentle approach for this little age.