14 year age gap?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he has a good career and no first family (no ex wife, no kids), and there isn’t some employee/boss dynamic going on, then I don’t think it’s terrible.

It will be much more challenging in 20 years.

We have a 10 year age difference. I ended up with the health issues. You never know the future.

Yours is the exception, not the rule. That is how statistics works.

Probably not. We've been married for 24 years.

Wait till he’s late 70s and you are mid 60s

I’m the PP who described my negative experience. Of course there are couples where it worked. But there is an extensive research that shows large age gaps relationships are less stable

I see from OPs post there is already a potential point of contempt: her daughter has a trust, her partner has to work AND he’s older. Money and sets from trusts are typically considered separate property. It could make transition to syncing their retirement easier, or to the opposite, complicate things. My exH retired at 56; I still work at 45 and we had very different preferences how to spend holidays, for example. All his friends were much older and I spent most of Christmases with very old executive retirees or his work colleagues (60-70 years olds). He would become combative when I suggested to alternate years. I feel like a lot of my young years were wasted on superficial people and things and people who were basic strangers and are no longer in my life post divorce. Despite my exH connections, he wouldn’t help with my own professional growth as he didn’t want me to be too absent from family duties

Not PP, but my DH and I are this far apart in age. Do you really think we younger spouses don't understand that there will be challenges that come with aging? What we understand that you don't is that it can absolutely be worth it. Very worth it. For a happy marriage and life for many years? Sounds like you have no context for that, given that you had a DH who would get "combative." Many of us are smart enough not to marry that -- age difference or not. Don't project your bad marriage onto others by blaming it on an age difference.

I don't think most people realize how fast the body ages once you hit like 60. DH is 60. He used to look much younger for his age, but like I said up thread, age catches up to us all.

How old is your DH?