Can I salvage my career after SAHM 22 years?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t hire you.

The problem is that no one who spent 22 years unemployed will dedicate themselves to a job or even be able to prioritize it.

People won’t take you seriously. Maybe 15 years ago, but not now. The ship sailed.

Plenty of people with illnesses and special needs kids are gainfully employed. If that was your excuse for staying home for 22 years then something else will happen or come up as to a reason you can’t work.

Maybe you’ll work for a short period of time but you’ll ultimately return to not working or wanting to work.

PP, did you have a bad experience with a "mommy hire"?

One bad experience does not mean all "mommy hires" will be just as bad.

That's called discrimination.

If you had a black person who did a bad job, would you then decided never to hire another black person?

That would be called discrimination.

Maybe you should take a good long look at your prejudices and try to adjust your attitude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Maybe you think wrong, PP.

Maybe some SAHMs have to stay home for reasons you can't comprehend.

People do have different lives than yours.

I've gone back to work after years as a SAHM. I always wanted to have a career, but I had to stay home for reasons I don't care to explain.
But finally, I do have a career. And I work harder and produce more than anyone in my office.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You fulfilled your parental obligation very honorably. You have my respect.

I would find organizations or lawyers who do the type of work you care about. Try to meet with them. Be honest. Explain that you feel you have more to give. Let them decide where to plug you in.

It may take a few attempts, but one should click.

Good luck (I know a lot of parents with disabled kids need advocates to obtain the quality of education their children are supposed to receive? Or a women’s shelter? Law school pro bono clinic? The needs are great.)

This is what I was thinking. If OP managed to navigate the special education system, and launch her child into something of a stable young adulthood, she's well positioned to advise families on the same.

I wholeheartedly agree with the bolded above. Incorporate an LLC, get cheap malpractice insurance, and throw up a professional website (they are cheap nowadays) advertising yourself as an education rights lawyer who has also experienced the fight first-hand as a mother. Charge low rates at first. Call practitioners in the area, explain your situation, and ask them to send you would-be clients who can’t pay their rates. Reply to posts on “moms” Facebook groups. Etc.

You will get clients by having low rates, and some hustle. And even if only a few clients, all of a sudden you have work experience to list on a resume if you want to find a legal job elsewhere. Nobody knows how busy (or not) you are as a solo.

[Anonymous]

Maybe apply for something like this to get your foot in the door: http://www.camoranlaw.com/internship

[Anonymous]

I had a 15 year break from my profession. Half of that time was spent pursuing a different career, the other half was as a sahm.
I returned to my first career because I needed a stable job. That previous passion career was not family friendly and I never talked about it until recently 12 years after re-entering my original profession.

I did small projects during sahm-hood that kept my skills up. I got back in thru my first employer who then hooked me to a recruiter. I had to start at the bottom again but within 6 months I bumped up to a better job with better pay AND most importantly part-time so I could still pick up the kids from school.

Everybody says this scenario is impossible but I know a few other moms who also managed to get back in part-time. You have to dig but these positions exist. Professional skillsets that do not need company benefits (because the spouse is providing those) is a bonus for the company.

[Anonymous]

I think the proper question in this situation is, can I establish a career after 22 years as a SAHM? I would recommend that you consider jobs that require solid writing skills where legal knowledge can be useful. Here's a few of those jobs.

Labor and employee relations specialist
Contracting Specialist or Contracting Officer
Freedom of Information Act Specialist (FOIA)
Ethics Advisor

Also, COPD is a severe physical disability, so you may apply to many Federal Jobs using a Schedule A authority once you get a doctor's letter to certify your disability. Read more here: https://www.eeoc.gov/publications/abcs-schedule-tips-applicants-disabilities-getting-federal-jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Well, you are correct that my priority for the last 22 years was not work - it was my son. If I had a job, there is no way I would have been able to advocate for his rights in the public or private school system (yes, he has been through both systems in my effort to find a supportive school environment). If I had worked for the past 22 years, I would never have been able to tutor him. Many tutors gave up on him. With my help, he graduated high-school with a 3.8 GPA, having taken a handful of AP and dual enrollment classes. He is maintaining a GPA of 3.3 in college.

My illness began 8 years ago due to exposure to environmental toxins. I was diagnosed with early COPD with a lung capacity of 40% and was immunocompromised. Covid left me bedridden for one month and weakened me further. Conventional medicine could not help me. With the help of a functional medical doctor and holistic practitioners, I am regaining my health now.

So you are absolutely correct that I chose NOT to work because my priorities were my son and my health. Things are different now.

I’m sorry but advocating for your son could not have been a full time occupation. You could have certainly had some job throughout that period, many special need parents. You chose not to work because you didn’t need to and probably didn’t like it much. And that’s fine. But that will be the perception of many potential employers, and it will be somewhat valid.

I am sorry you had serious health effects, what toxins were you exposed to as a SAHM? Most people encounter them at workplaces. Anyways, your screed against “conventional medicine” doesn’t really pertain to the jobs board, and certainly never mention any of that in the process for your job search.

[Anonymous]

Another thought. I know someone who had a similar situation. He graduated with his JD and passed the bar. He had a clerkship, but at the end of his clerkship, he had a chance to become a professional athlete in an area that he was pretty good at. He played sports for about 12 years and then when he was older, he left the sport. He had a similar situation where no one really wanted to hire him as a lawyer. He became a law librarian and went to work at a university library. His legal background helped him work in the library. I met him when he was still working, but he's since retired.

So, OP, you might want to look into positions as a law librarian. Your legal background would be applicable and helpful, but you wouldn't be working as a working lawyer, which may be difficult after all this time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another thought. I know someone who had a similar situation. He graduated with his JD and passed the bar. He had a clerkship, but at the end of his clerkship, he had a chance to become a professional athlete in an area that he was pretty good at. He played sports for about 12 years and then when he was older, he left the sport. He had a similar situation where no one really wanted to hire him as a lawyer. He became a law librarian and went to work at a university library. His legal background helped him work in the library. I met him when he was still working, but he's since retired.

So, OP, you might want to look into positions as a law librarian. Your legal background would be applicable and helpful, but you wouldn't be working as a working lawyer, which may be difficult after all this time.

My cousin is a law librarian. It’s a highly coveted field, and it’s a shrinking role — it’s phasing out as research tools and documents go online.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t have a career to salvage.

I did work for a very short period of time until I was in the 8th month of my pregnancy. Still not much of a "career" so I clearly wasn't as accurate as I could have been. Try, however, to focus on the point of my post.

8 months is not a career.

[Anonymous]

OP, admittedly I only read the first couple of pages of this thread, but if someone hasn't suggested it already, check out DC Volunteer Lawyer's Project. They provide training and it's such a worthy organization, helping people in DC. Could be a truly wonderful way to get back into the legal community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Well, you are correct that my priority for the last 22 years was not work - it was my son. If I had a job, there is no way I would have been able to advocate for his rights in the public or private school system (yes, he has been through both systems in my effort to find a supportive school environment). If I had worked for the past 22 years, I would never have been able to tutor him. Many tutors gave up on him. With my help, he graduated high-school with a 3.8 GPA, having taken a handful of AP and dual enrollment classes. He is maintaining a GPA of 3.3 in college.

My illness began 8 years ago due to exposure to environmental toxins. I was diagnosed with early COPD with a lung capacity of 40% and was immunocompromised. Covid left me bedridden for one month and weakened me further. Conventional medicine could not help me. With the help of a functional medical doctor and holistic practitioners, I am regaining my health now.

So you are absolutely correct that I chose NOT to work because my priorities were my son and my health. Things are different now.

I’m sorry but advocating for your son could not have been a full time occupation. You could have certainly had some job throughout that period, many special need parents. You chose not to work because you didn’t need to and probably didn’t like it much. And that’s fine. But that will be the perception of many potential employers, and it will be somewhat valid.

I am sorry you had serious health effects, what toxins were you exposed to as a SAHM? Most people encounter them at workplaces. Anyways, your screed against “conventional medicine” doesn’t really pertain to the jobs board, and certainly never mention any of that in the process for your job search.

Agree with the poster above.

I bet OP sees some of her former classmates benefiting from decades of career investment and grinding with important jobs and wants to be like them.

Plenty of us have to work and provide and don’t have the luxury of quitting. We just balance it and have a constant to-do list. And yes, we have impressive titles or whatever. But those didn’t fall into our laps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Well, you are correct that my priority for the last 22 years was not work - it was my son. If I had a job, there is no way I would have been able to advocate for his rights in the public or private school system (yes, he has been through both systems in my effort to find a supportive school environment). If I had worked for the past 22 years, I would never have been able to tutor him. Many tutors gave up on him. With my help, he graduated high-school with a 3.8 GPA, having taken a handful of AP and dual enrollment classes. He is maintaining a GPA of 3.3 in college.

My illness began 8 years ago due to exposure to environmental toxins. I was diagnosed with early COPD with a lung capacity of 40% and was immunocompromised. Covid left me bedridden for one month and weakened me further. Conventional medicine could not help me. With the help of a functional medical doctor and holistic practitioners, I am regaining my health now.

So you are absolutely correct that I chose NOT to work because my priorities were my son and my health. Things are different now.

I’m sorry but advocating for your son could not have been a full time occupation. You could have certainly had some job throughout that period, many special need parents. You chose not to work because you didn’t need to and probably didn’t like it much. And that’s fine. But that will be the perception of many potential employers, and it will be somewhat valid.

I am sorry you had serious health effects, what toxins were you exposed to as a SAHM? Most people encounter them at workplaces. Anyways, your screed against “conventional medicine” doesn’t really pertain to the jobs board, and certainly never mention any of that in the process for your job search.

Agree with the poster above.

I bet OP sees some of her former classmates benefiting from decades of career investment and grinding with important jobs and wants to be like them.

Plenty of us have to work and provide and don’t have the luxury of quitting. We just balance it and have a constant to-do list. And yes, we have impressive titles or whatever. But those didn’t fall into our laps.

No. Since I became a SAHM, I never kept in touch with any of my former classmates. My entire world changed, including the people I kept in touch with. My days were filled with taking my son to occupational therapy, sensory therapy, social group therapy, floortime, doctor appointments, speech therapy, managing IEPs and 504's, doing online research, finding tutors, then homeschooling him after he quit the public school system. He isn't my only child either, so I was busy all day.

As for the previous poster's comment, I chose not to work because my highest priority was my son. The next priority was my health. My career wasn't a priority at all during that time. I think I already made that clear in another reply that you probably missed.

I'm very blessed that I didn't need to work for income, either.

Environmental toxins may be at workplaces, but about 40% of homes in the US have unsafe levels of environmental toxins also. Unfortunately genetic testing showed I don't have the ability to detox as well as 75% of the population.

And I made TWO short comments about conventional medicine, so...not a screed. I mentioned that because because navigating allopathic treatment and the conventional standard of care options for my condition took many years before I found holistic solutions. This kept me out of the job market. This is relevant to my post. But I am indeed a big fan of holistic medicine now too, regardless of whether or not it pertains to the subject of jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Well, you are correct that my priority for the last 22 years was not work - it was my son. If I had a job, there is no way I would have been able to advocate for his rights in the public or private school system (yes, he has been through both systems in my effort to find a supportive school environment). If I had worked for the past 22 years, I would never have been able to tutor him. Many tutors gave up on him. With my help, he graduated high-school with a 3.8 GPA, having taken a handful of AP and dual enrollment classes. He is maintaining a GPA of 3.3 in college.

My illness began 8 years ago due to exposure to environmental toxins. I was diagnosed with early COPD with a lung capacity of 40% and was immunocompromised. Covid left me bedridden for one month and weakened me further. Conventional medicine could not help me. With the help of a functional medical doctor and holistic practitioners, I am regaining my health now.

So you are absolutely correct that I chose NOT to work because my priorities were my son and my health. Things are different now.

I’m sorry but advocating for your son could not have been a full time occupation. You could have certainly had some job throughout that period, many special need parents. You chose not to work because you didn’t need to and probably didn’t like it much. And that’s fine. But that will be the perception of many potential employers, and it will be somewhat valid.

I am sorry you had serious health effects, what toxins were you exposed to as a SAHM? Most people encounter them at workplaces. Anyways, your screed against “conventional medicine” doesn’t really pertain to the jobs board, and certainly never mention any of that in the process for your job search.

Agree with the poster above.

I bet OP sees some of her former classmates benefiting from decades of career investment and grinding with important jobs and wants to be like them.

Plenty of us have to work and provide and don’t have the luxury of quitting. We just balance it and have a constant to-do list. And yes, we have impressive titles or whatever. But those didn’t fall into our laps.

No. Since I became a SAHM, I never kept in touch with any of my former classmates. My entire world changed, including the people I kept in touch with. My days were filled with taking my son to occupational therapy, sensory therapy, social group therapy, floortime, doctor appointments, speech therapy, managing IEPs and 504's, doing online research, finding tutors, then homeschooling him after he quit the public school system. He isn't my only child either, so I was busy all day.

As for the previous poster's comment, I chose not to work because my highest priority was my son. The next priority was my health. My career wasn't a priority at all during that time. I think I already made that clear in another reply that you probably missed.

I'm very blessed that I didn't need to work for income, either.

Environmental toxins may be at workplaces, but about 40% of homes in the US have unsafe levels of environmental toxins also. Unfortunately genetic testing showed I don't have the ability to detox as well as 75% of the population.

And I made TWO short comments about conventional medicine, so...not a screed. I mentioned that because because navigating allopathic treatment and the conventional standard of care options for my condition took many years before I found holistic solutions. This kept me out of the job market. This is relevant to my post. But I am indeed a big fan of holistic medicine now too, regardless of whether or not it pertains to the subject of jobs.

You’ve now lost my sympathy, OP. I do all of those things and work full time. I am also a single mom.

It’s fine to want to work after many years of staying at home but you’ve lost me once you’re feeling sorry for yourself about all the reasons you stayed home. What a luxury.

Signed, Single mom with a disability and chronic illness and a child with autism, ADHD, and anxiety

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not in a position to hire anyone right now but if I were, I would hire someone like you for a junior lawyer position. And I would do it gladly. You have the same prerequisites any junior lawyer would have (law school isn’t helpful anyway), and I would expect personal maturity and organizational skills.

Same. I work at a small law firm of former BigLaw lawyers. We have high standards but can't compete in hiring with BigLaw. The associates we've hired the past 5 years have all been terrible despite having good grades from respectable law schools -- can't write, no ability to figure things out on their own or problem solve, can't analyze a case correctly, complain about 2 in-person days in the office. I can only conclude that there has been a brain drain from law to STEM fields. I've been thinking lately that what we really need is a SAHM former lawyer with good credentials heading back to work. I can train someone within reason to write or read a case but I can't figure out how to get someone to problem solve or take ownership of a project who does not seem to have that chip. I've been practicing for almost 30 years and the decline the last few years has been notable.

OP I think the suggestion to be CASA volunteer is a good one -- just to get you back in the mindset of advocacy and being around lawyers. If you have some money to throw at the problem, it might be worth checking out some LLM programs. I'm normally not an advocate of these, but in your case if you can go and do a year of law school and get good grades it might get your confidence up, and you will at least have something on your resume to show you are serious.

Don't do document review -- it's the worst and it won't get you where you want to go. Tell everyone you know you are looking -- maybe a solo or small firm will pick you up to do some temp overflow work or something. Get your foot in the door. Even if you are in your 50s you could still have a 10-20 year work life ahead of you. Law is one field where ageism is less of a problem -- I work with plenty of crusty old lawyers who are at the top of their game. Good luck!

I guess. Whenever I hear of SAHMs who stayed home for long periods of time I think they aren’t career minded at all and don’t want a career. Which is fine but I am not motivated to help them find a job. Pretty much every woman has legit reasons to stay home but if you want to work, you do. It seems high unusual that someone who will focus on a job and do a great job would go without one for 22 years.

Illness that somehow lasts 22 years but she is now “healing.” What kind of illness is it and what does that mean? To me it’s more support she doesn’t want a job.

Well, you are correct that my priority for the last 22 years was not work - it was my son. If I had a job, there is no way I would have been able to advocate for his rights in the public or private school system (yes, he has been through both systems in my effort to find a supportive school environment). If I had worked for the past 22 years, I would never have been able to tutor him. Many tutors gave up on him. With my help, he graduated high-school with a 3.8 GPA, having taken a handful of AP and dual enrollment classes. He is maintaining a GPA of 3.3 in college.

My illness began 8 years ago due to exposure to environmental toxins. I was diagnosed with early COPD with a lung capacity of 40% and was immunocompromised. Covid left me bedridden for one month and weakened me further. Conventional medicine could not help me. With the help of a functional medical doctor and holistic practitioners, I am regaining my health now.

So you are absolutely correct that I chose NOT to work because my priorities were my son and my health. Things are different now.

I’m sorry but advocating for your son could not have been a full time occupation. You could have certainly had some job throughout that period, many special need parents. You chose not to work because you didn’t need to and probably didn’t like it much. And that’s fine. But that will be the perception of many potential employers, and it will be somewhat valid.

I am sorry you had serious health effects, what toxins were you exposed to as a SAHM? Most people encounter them at workplaces. Anyways, your screed against “conventional medicine” doesn’t really pertain to the jobs board, and certainly never mention any of that in the process for your job search.

Agree with the poster above.

I bet OP sees some of her former classmates benefiting from decades of career investment and grinding with important jobs and wants to be like them.

Plenty of us have to work and provide and don’t have the luxury of quitting. We just balance it and have a constant to-do list. And yes, we have impressive titles or whatever. But those didn’t fall into our laps.

No. Since I became a SAHM, I never kept in touch with any of my former classmates. My entire world changed, including the people I kept in touch with. My days were filled with taking my son to occupational therapy, sensory therapy, social group therapy, floortime, doctor appointments, speech therapy, managing IEPs and 504's, doing online research, finding tutors, then homeschooling him after he quit the public school system. He isn't my only child either, so I was busy all day.

As for the previous poster's comment, I chose not to work because my highest priority was my son. The next priority was my health. My career wasn't a priority at all during that time. I think I already made that clear in another reply that you probably missed.

I'm very blessed that I didn't need to work for income, either.

Environmental toxins may be at workplaces, but about 40% of homes in the US have unsafe levels of environmental toxins also. Unfortunately genetic testing showed I don't have the ability to detox as well as 75% of the population.

And I made TWO short comments about conventional medicine, so...not a screed. I mentioned that because because navigating allopathic treatment and the conventional standard of care options for my condition took many years before I found holistic solutions. This kept me out of the job market. This is relevant to my post. But I am indeed a big fan of holistic medicine now too, regardless of whether or not it pertains to the subject of jobs.

Well this explains it all. You think you have a made up illness and you really think you couldn’t work with a child with special needs. Millions of Americans go to work every day and have sick kids or some sort of illness. A blind woman scanned my ticket at Disney world last week.

There are consequences to your behavior and not working for decades means you’ll have problems finding employment now.