| I've had five kids. Mid-late 20s is the best age. |
| 42 was great for me. Luckily, I am smart enough to know it might not be for others. Enjoy patting yourself on the back. |
| For ones with student loans and low income, its crucial to increase income, pay off debt and build an emergency fund before having children. That is, if you even want to have any. Kids are expensive and life can turn into a cycle of non ending struggle. Its a luxury subscription with high monthly fees fir 21years, not everyone needs it. |
Just like having kids after 40 is a questionable decision, having 5 kids is also one. Obviously everyone is entitled to their choice but its not for everyone. |
I love how you said everyone is entitled to their choice but added a load of judgment with the “questionable decision.” MYOB, I’m sure you hate it when people question and judge your life decisions. |
| 46? |
Because every age has drawbacks and parenting is always hard. I am not trying to discourage anyone from having kids! Just saying that these debates about when people should have them really come down to minuscule differences in the good v. the bad compared to the overall physical, emotional, and financial cost of having children. And there is always an element of uncertainty involved. |
She'd berate for any after 25.
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Exactly. |
+1 |
| Physically I think it is better to have kids younger/later 20's. Pregnancy is harder as you get older also harder to keep up with kids as you age. I am 46 now and can not imagine having a toddler let alone a newborn. But I also understand that most of us can't control when we have kids. |
I think the age of women should still be before 35 for at least first child. This thread is about age of mother. The woman could be younger than the man. DH is a year younger than me. I was earning around 200k at age 30 when we had our first. Dh was earning less. By the time I had my third, he was earning 500k. I do think 25 is young because you haven’t established yourself at work yet. |
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Biology disagrees, but apparently we all transcend that these days.
I'd say mid forties is ideal. |
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I agree with OP overall. Got some time for my own life and adventures, some time with DH just us, and got pretty far in my career such that I was in a better place financially and also to have the reputation/expertise to be able to ask for more flexibility.
But - we are tired. Needed fertility treatment for one of our kids (mid 30s so may not have been age related). There have been a lot of times I wish we had them just a few yrs earlier. |
| Yeah the hate on 40 plus moms is strange here. I do find when people hate on others choices its because their own didn’t work out that well and they are trying to go back and justify their choices by tearing others down. |