Why wouldn’t this person just SAHM for a year or two?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's problematic that you think admin people "don't have careers." It might not be up to your standards, but it's a career. How ridiculous.

Some people just have no interest in being a stay-at-home-mom. And that's ok. I do have a higher paying career, but even if I didn't...I'm almost certain that I'd still work. I enjoy having somewhere to be every day, interacting with my colleagues and being part of a team, having something that is for "me" outside of the home, feeling like I'm contributing financially to the partnership with my husband, knowing I have a cushion in terms of financial security...the list goes on and on.

OP here and I’m sorry if I gave this impression— I know many admins have careers. My own job/career could be considered admin as it’s back office, not client facing.

It’s just this particular person does not have a career oriented job. She had a career in another field, had a baby, and then took a very low paying clerical job at a retail-level organization and I’m confused as to why someone would do this.

Maybe her husband doesn’t get health insurance through his job. Maybe she has anxiety and can’t
Work at a stressful job. Maybe a million things. You should be asking yourself why you are so damn judgmental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she likes working? Maybe she enjoys being around her colleagues and clients? Maybe it's not all about the money? It's disgusting that you think the only reasons might be that she is stupid or can't handle being alone with her child.

I did not say this (at all) and if you read my posts you can see I’m trying to understand. I’m not judging her, I was just confused by this choice. I appreciate the PPs who mentioned things like work helping with PPD (I had PPD so I get that) and wanting to be around other adults. I can relate to those things and this makes a bit more sense to me now.

I definitely don’t think she’s stupid or can’t be alone with her kid. The opposite, actually. She’s a capable person and loving mom so I guess I expected her to either go back to her prior profession or stay home. I was thrown for a loop.

Is your own life so incredibly narrow and boring that you can’t imagine that someone might make a different choice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it's odd and would be interested to hear why this woman chose this, just out of pure curiosity. But I also know it's none of my business. I wouldn't come right out and ask her about it.

OP here and this is literally why I asked on here. It struck me as a surprising and uncommon choice and I was curious, but this is a person like and don’t know well and I wouldn’t ask. I should have guessed how it would be received here (I was not judging her or people who do admin/clerical jobs, though I can see how the way I wrote it was not clear on that point.

A bunch of PPs have offered thoughtful responses and I appreciate that, though I wish I’d never posted the thread because I’ve also been called disgusting and gross.

Wow you are something else. PEOPLE MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES.

[Anonymous]

Because she doesn't want to stay home. Who cares why? Nothing says she has to. The end.

[Anonymous]

The anger of replies in this thread is nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it's odd and would be interested to hear why this woman chose this, just out of pure curiosity. But I also know it's none of my business. I wouldn't come right out and ask her about it.

OP here and this is literally why I asked on here. It struck me as a surprising and uncommon choice and I was curious, but this is a person like and don’t know well and I wouldn’t ask. I should have guessed how it would be received here (I was not judging her or people who do admin/clerical jobs, though I can see how the way I wrote it was not clear on that point.

A bunch of PPs have offered thoughtful responses and I appreciate that, though I wish I’d never posted the thread because I’ve also been called disgusting and gross.

Wow you are something else. PEOPLE MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES.

YES AND SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE CURIOUS WHY. For instance, now I wonder why you are screaming at a stranger in all caps. Defensive much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you would have liked the responses better if you had asked something like,

What are the reasons why a mother of young children would choose to WOHM if her income is not even enough to cover the cost of childcare while she works [and her current job does not offer room for career growth].

Then no one can call you names because you're asking a fair question with no obvious judgment....

This is literally what was asked.

OP is getting bashed for a reason - below is from her OP which is very different from the above and very clearly judging. She clearly has thought about the idea that a woman may not want to SAHP full time and thinks that's "odd".

I’m normally unphased by whatever work/childcare situation someone sets up (I work, ftr) but I don’t get this one. She doesn’t have a career to protect and her job is the sort you can find anytime. Is it just that some people don’t want or can’t handle that much time with a baby or toddler? It just seems odd.

[Anonymous]

Mental health. I stayed home for 1 year and even that was too much time with a baby. It's isolating. (Plus it was during the pandemic, so even more isolating)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it's odd and would be interested to hear why this woman chose this, just out of pure curiosity. But I also know it's none of my business. I wouldn't come right out and ask her about it.

OP here and this is literally why I asked on here. It struck me as a surprising and uncommon choice and I was curious, but this is a person like and don’t know well and I wouldn’t ask. I should have guessed how it would be received here (I was not judging her or people who do admin/clerical jobs, though I can see how the way I wrote it was not clear on that point.

A bunch of PPs have offered thoughtful responses and I appreciate that, though I wish I’d never posted the thread because I’ve also been called disgusting and gross.

Wow you are something else. PEOPLE MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES.

YES AND SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE CURIOUS WHY. For instance, now I wonder why you are screaming at a stranger in all caps. Defensive much?

If OP is curious and needs an answer then she should put in her big girl pants and ask the person she is so bewildered by.

[Anonymous]

I could totally see myself working as a fitness class receptionist if I was mostly a SAHM. Would keep me motivated to do the classes, stay in shape, probably a discount.

[Anonymous]

I don't think this is surprising at all. It actually seems like a great job for a wealthy SAHM. Adult interaction in a glossy, fitness oriented enviroment. Motivation to work out. Sign me up.

[Anonymous]

Part of the reason I love being a working mom is that I have consistent, scheduled help with my kids! I get depressed changing diapers etc 24 hours a day.