Teachers, how is your mental health?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

One of our first-year teachers came very close to quitting at the end of last week. She said she would've quit if she didn't have student loan payments beginning next month.

[Anonymous]

We had 2 teachers that are new Mom's come back for a week and quit, a first-year teacher quit and a 27 year vet quit. We still cannot find a .4 music teacher. Our school is so understaffed. The librarian came back from maternity leave and she looked crazed by the end of the day. I doubt she makes it a month at this zoo. We are in a high needs title 1 school in Gaithersburg and it is TOUGH!!!! You must be made of steel to survive a year at this place.

[Anonymous]

I'm 50 and in my 29th year. A few years ago I had fully planned on working at least 33 years to age 55. At that point I would will be eligible for unreduced state and county pension benefits (I'm in FCPS). Now I'm seriously looking at whether I can afford to stop at 30 years and age 52, at which point I am still eligible for full state, but county benefits would be reduced.

Even if I stop and work another job, if my net is about the same as it is now and I can eliminate the 11-12 hour days and some of the stress I might stop after 30 years. My pay is not increasing since I've been at the top of the pay scale for a few years now and we can keep healthcare premiums about the same through my DW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

That sounds like a general comparison/complaint, not something related to the pandemic and misbehavior/unsocialization caused by school closures and lockdowns.

DP: But there was no gap in socialization and no gap in academic or behavioral expectations during COVID for these kids either. They aren't behind socially or academically, so now the gulf is wider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

It’s reality. I saw it both as a student 35 years ago and as a parent 5 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

That sounds like a general comparison/complaint, not something related to the pandemic and misbehavior/unsocialization caused by school closures and lockdowns.

DP: But there was no gap in socialization and no gap in academic or behavioral expectations during COVID for these kids either. They aren't behind socially or academically, so now the gulf is wider.

+1 There also is a group of parents with common core values, which includes "I am paying $55,000 a year for you to go to school so you need to work hard and do your best." It also helps immeasurably that most of the private school students had adequate support at home so they worked hard and didn't fall behind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was in the grocery store today and saw multiple kids acting nuts while the adults they were with didn't bat an eye. There is a lot of lazy parenting going on. By the time your kid is in ES, they should know how to behave at a store. These kids were running down the aisles dodging carts and yelling. One kid screamed across a few aisles to get someone's attention. They were all 9 or older. Old enough to have some self-control.

I empathize with teachers this year but you need to cut the parents some slack as well. The ones who have been trying to juggle full time jobs while unexpectedly supervising their children’s virtual learning for the last 1.5 years /dealing with quarantines and alternatingly being demonized for taking their kids to places unnecessarily or for failing to adequately socialize them. Frankly a lot of parents are just burnt out too.

So because parents are tired, they shouldn't have to raise their kids? Who else is going to do it? Everyone is tired. Stop making excuses.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

+1
-Private school teacher of 11 years

[Anonymous]

22 year veteran of independent school teaching. This year is so much better than last year so that makes me happy. We have been in person both years. Admin keeps piling more on and then dumps their toxic positivity on us which just rings so hollow. I’m losing respect for principals and HOS. They don’t seem to have a clue as to what goes on in the classroom. I suppose they’ve always been out of touch but it’s so obvious now. Kids are great though. They are happy to have more freedom this year and honestly seem grateful for the teachers’ efforts. Great about the masks. No more misbehavior than prior years. They are the highlight of the day. I teach middle school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

Mob NO teacher is ever prepared for how hard the job is and we ALL wanted to quit our first year. Tell her it gets better/easier and that she will get stronger.

[Anonymous]

You are petrified every single day your first year! And completely exhausted. It’s a complete shock how hard it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

Mob NO teacher is ever prepared for how hard the job is and we ALL wanted to quit our first year. Tell her it gets better/easier and that she will get stronger.

Yes, and I know teaching is particularly tough, but any job can be difficult in the first weeks until you get used to everything.

[Anonymous]

It’s true that the first year is terribly hard snd the few first weeks every year are tough even as a veteran. However, veterans are citing specific reasons why this year is the hardest they ever recall. Even veterans with a history of working with communities experiencing trauma. Things are that bad this year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

Mob NO teacher is ever prepared for how hard the job is and we ALL wanted to quit our first year. Tell her it gets better/easier and that she will get stronger.

I wouldn’t tell her that because I don’t believe it to be true. I would have said that at any time during my first 20 years of teaching, but over the past few years that has changed. There has been a shift and it is not getting easier.