Teachers, how is your mental health?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We want to enroll DS in a private school next year. Have talked to numerous places around DMV - they’d have you believe everything has been smooth sailing, no behavior issues, teachers have everything under control etc. Obviously they need to portray stability but I cannot possibly see how they are not encountering such issues. Kids are kids and all have been impacted over the past 18 months.

You're right, PP, of course both private and public school kids have presenting behavior issues, often as a result of the pandemic. The big difference, however, is how each is allowed to handle that misbehavior. In private schools, you will not find the layers upon layers of useless bureaucracy that must be plowed through in the public school system, in order to reach resolution to a serious issue. If your kid has a problem in the classroom - or if your kid IS the problem in the classroom - the school will be on it and will work with families involved/ needed administrators immediately to do what they can to solve it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

That sounds like a general comparison/complaint, not something related to the pandemic and misbehavior/unsocialization caused by school closures and lockdowns.

DP: But there was no gap in socialization and no gap in academic or behavioral expectations during COVID for these kids either. They aren't behind socially or academically, so now the gulf is wider.

Private school teacher here. They are definitely behind socially/emotionally maybe just not as much as public school. They definitely got thr academic leg up though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

Mob NO teacher is ever prepared for how hard the job is and we ALL wanted to quit our first year. Tell her it gets better/easier and that she will get stronger.

I wouldn’t tell her that because I don’t believe it to be true. I would have said that at any time during my first 20 years of teaching, but over the past few years that has changed. There has been a shift and it is not getting easier.

Same. I definitely would have said that during my first 15-20 years. Now? Nope. It is just getting harder and worse every year. I love what I do and I know I am great at it but I will not recommend that anyone do it unless they absolutely have to do it to keep food on the table and a roof over your head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:22 year veteran of independent school teaching. This year is so much better than last year so that makes me happy. We have been in person both years. Admin keeps piling more on and then dumps their toxic positivity on us which just rings so hollow. I’m losing respect for principals and HOS. They don’t seem to have a clue as to what goes on in the classroom. I suppose they’ve always been out of touch but it’s so obvious now. Kids are great though. They are happy to have more freedom this year and honestly seem grateful for the teachers’ efforts. Great about the masks. No more misbehavior than prior years. They are the highlight of the day. I teach middle school.

I’m in the same boat. Admin are the worst. I show up everyday for the kids. Ignore the rest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an ES teacher. I had a short chat at the copier today with a first year teacher. She had said something like, “I don’t want to do this anymore”. I asked “Do what?” And she said, “Teach”. This is only her 8th week. When I mentioned that she said that thought honestly scares her and that she really wasn’t prepared for everything the job entails.

Mob NO teacher is ever prepared for how hard the job is and we ALL wanted to quit our first year. Tell her it gets better/easier and that she will get stronger.

I wouldn’t tell her that because I don’t believe it to be true. I would have said that at any time during my first 20 years of teaching, but over the past few years that has changed. There has been a shift and it is not getting easier.

Same. I definitely would have said that during my first 15-20 years. Now? Nope. It is just getting harder and worse every year. I love what I do and I know I am great at it but I will not recommend that anyone do it unless they absolutely have to do it to keep food on the table and a roof over your head.

+1

[Anonymous]

My mom was a trailblazer. A special ed teacher who told me 25 years ago NOT to go into teaching. She saw the writing on the wall. I am so glad that I didn't. I do work in education but in a specialty position that is more flexible then a teacher and also (unjustifiably) gets more respect. I bow down to teachers. They work hard and so many live and breathe that job. I don't think I have what it takes to be a teacher so I am glad I didn't go that route. I will tell my own children NOT to work in the public schools. With pensions dwindling and the amount of time it takes to earn them makes it no longer worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom was a trailblazer. A special ed teacher who told me 25 years ago NOT to go into teaching. She saw the writing on the wall. I am so glad that I didn't. I do work in education but in a specialty position that is more flexible then a teacher and also (unjustifiably) gets more respect. I bow down to teachers. They work hard and so many live and breathe that job. I don't think I have what it takes to be a teacher so I am glad I didn't go that route. I will tell my own children NOT to work in the public schools. With pensions dwindling and the amount of time it takes to earn them makes it no longer worth it.

As opposed to the private sector where pensions are virtually unheard of anymore?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was a trailblazer. A special ed teacher who told me 25 years ago NOT to go into teaching. She saw the writing on the wall. I am so glad that I didn't. I do work in education but in a specialty position that is more flexible then a teacher and also (unjustifiably) gets more respect. I bow down to teachers. They work hard and so many live and breathe that job. I don't think I have what it takes to be a teacher so I am glad I didn't go that route. I will tell my own children NOT to work in the public schools. With pensions dwindling and the amount of time it takes to earn them makes it no longer worth it.

As opposed to the private sector where pensions are virtually unheard of anymore?

Teachers know there are no pensions in private schools. One of the advantages and reasons to put up with all the bureaucracy and headaches of working in the public school used to be the benefits and pension. Not any more. I’d rather forgo the pittance pension public schools offer offer and work at a smaller private school with a healthier and safer work environment.

If states want to hire and retain quality teachers they are going to have to do more to entice them. Offering a lousy benefits package including crummy, overpriced insurance and a dismal pension is no incentive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was a trailblazer. A special ed teacher who told me 25 years ago NOT to go into teaching. She saw the writing on the wall. I am so glad that I didn't. I do work in education but in a specialty position that is more flexible then a teacher and also (unjustifiably) gets more respect. I bow down to teachers. They work hard and so many live and breathe that job. I don't think I have what it takes to be a teacher so I am glad I didn't go that route. I will tell my own children NOT to work in the public schools. With pensions dwindling and the amount of time it takes to earn them makes it no longer worth it.

As opposed to the private sector where pensions are virtually unheard of anymore?

Teachers know there are no pensions in private schools. One of the advantages and reasons to put up with all the bureaucracy and headaches of working in the public school used to be the benefits and pension. Not any more. I’d rather forgo the pittance pension public schools offer offer and work at a smaller private school with a healthier and safer work environment.

If states want to hire and retain quality teachers they are going to have to do more to entice them. Offering a lousy benefits package including crummy, overpriced insurance and a dismal pension is no incentive.

The don't exist in any career field like they used to. I feel badly for people starting their careers now. Gen Xers were always told that jobs were going to suck and you'd put up with a ton of crap to do your job. For some reason, the younger generations have been told they deserve work/life balance and to enjoy their working hours. lol. We never had those expectations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was a trailblazer. A special ed teacher who told me 25 years ago NOT to go into teaching. She saw the writing on the wall. I am so glad that I didn't. I do work in education but in a specialty position that is more flexible then a teacher and also (unjustifiably) gets more respect. I bow down to teachers. They work hard and so many live and breathe that job. I don't think I have what it takes to be a teacher so I am glad I didn't go that route. I will tell my own children NOT to work in the public schools. With pensions dwindling and the amount of time it takes to earn them makes it no longer worth it.

As opposed to the private sector where pensions are virtually unheard of anymore?

Teachers know there are no pensions in private schools. One of the advantages and reasons to put up with all the bureaucracy and headaches of working in the public school used to be the benefits and pension. Not any more. I’d rather forgo the pittance pension public schools offer offer and work at a smaller private school with a healthier and safer work environment.

If states want to hire and retain quality teachers they are going to have to do more to entice them. Offering a lousy benefits package including crummy, overpriced insurance and a dismal pension is no incentive.

The don't exist in any career field like they used to. I feel badly for people starting their careers now. Gen Xers were always told that jobs were going to suck and you'd put up with a ton of crap to do your job. For some reason, the younger generations have been told they deserve work/life balance and to enjoy their working hours. lol. We never had those expectations.

The old pensions used to make up for the low salaries teachers received. If pensions are no longer generous/attractive then states will need to increase teacher salaries so that teachers are actually able to save for retirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

m

We are at a private school as well and are having none of these issues. I think it helps too that most privates opened in some capacity last year so they got a rhythm going early. Even re: mask wearing, one student repeatedly wore a saggy mask and all of the kids complained so the issue was quickly addressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

It is and not true. If you actually attended a private school you would know this. There is no amount of money from any donor that is worth losing large numbers of tuition paying families. Private school families walk when there are behavior issues. You think they’d stay and PAY for that? As a long time private school parent, it makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

It is and not true. If you actually attended a private school you would know this. There is no amount of money from any donor that is worth losing large numbers of tuition paying families. Private school families walk when there are behavior issues. You think they’d stay and PAY for that? As a long time private school parent, it makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

It is and not true. If you actually attended a private school you would know this. There is no amount of money from any donor that is worth losing large numbers of tuition paying families. Private school families walk when there are behavior issues. You think they’d stay and PAY for that? As a long time private school parent, it makes no sense.

Unfortunately, they do stay. I’ve seen it happen at three different schools. They complain, but they stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question - are these behavioral issues limited to public schools? Are these problems still popping up in various upscale private schools in the area?

Private schools don't have to allow misbehaviors. Public schools have to take everybody. I teach at a public school and our kids go to well-known DMV private schools. In general there is a huge difference in parental expectations and child behaviors. Our kids and their friends don't misbehave because they know their parents won't tolerate it. At public schools it seems like some (only some) seem to actually encourage bad behavior in their kids.

There’s misbehavior in private schools. It is tolerated if the parents are big donors.

That's a tired trope.

It is and not true. If you actually attended a private school you would know this. There is no amount of money from any donor that is worth losing large numbers of tuition paying families. Private school families walk when there are behavior issues. You think they’d stay and PAY for that? As a long time private school parent, it makes no sense.

Unfortunately, they do stay. I’ve seen it happen at three different schools. They complain, but they stay.

DP. Then you must be talking about the smaller schools with a smaller applicant pool. Our kids go to larger, well-known schools frequently mentioned here. Parents wouldn't walk, they would actually have the HOS fired and replace the Board. If that didn't work then they would walk. There is no tolerance for miscreant behavior at some of the heavyweight schools and it doesn't matter who a kid's parent is.