Post your DCs names and we'll tell you what we assume about you. Snark is obviously expected!

Anonymous
Clara or Claire
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Michael
Katherine
Peter
Caroline


You chime in on the Beauty and Fashion board about under eye concealer and anti-aging cream, and were disgusted with the whole "no women should be wearing capris" thread, as it was casual Friday and you had on your new capris with the margarita glasses and palm trees on them that you paid a pretty penny for last summer in the Outer Banks. Michael doesn't call as much as he used to now that he is married (inter-faith ceremony with a rabbi and a priest, don't get me started on how much paying for that open bar cost you) and Peter is finally on his own after paying off his student loan debt while living with you, even though now he and your husband are not speaking to each other. Katherine, not Kate (she is in her 30's and the Kate Middleton craze was not yet upon us) is causing you great angst by not using her Literature degree and staying home with Eleanor and Lucy. Caroline, the youngest, is still in college and just will NOT friend you on facebook so you can see what is really going on in that sorority.

Your marriage is strong, still going at it at least 1x/week with your deceivingly muscular husband (you just would never guess what a bod he has going on under that suit!) and you are just hoping Caroline doesn't get pregnant before marriage. After all, your mother is still alive (don't get me start on how much her assistive living is costing you)


Seriously where is this mom? I work all day, get home and run to the computer to see how close I am, and am left hanging. Quick, someone with these identical kids names throw me a bone here. This is the one I'm most proud of, too!!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Fine. I give in. Do me too!

Ds1 John ( goes by jack)
Dd1 Virginia
Dd2 Meredith
Ds 2 Tanner


Tanner is a stupid name.[/quote]

Said the stupid person.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:DS: Tyler
DD: Anna


You are the DH. Your wife chose these names because she said all your suggestions were so bad, she actually thought you were just fucking with her. You wish Tyler were more athletic than he is. You do not believe that Legos count as a sport. It disappoints you that he is quicker to cry than other kids on the playground and you fear he will be a total beta when he gets older. You are fond of Anna but just don't know what to make of girls so you tend to leave most of her raising up to her mother. Your wife never lost the last 20 lbs of baby weight but to your credit, this doesn't bother you. You have regularly scheduled sex on Friday nights. On the one hand, you appreciate knowing you'll get it once a week but on the other hand, it depresses you that you now have to schedule sex. You make a real effort to choose meaningful gifts for Christmas and anniversaries but your wife always returns them. You briefly considered opening an Ashley Madison account just to look around but never got up the nerve. A part of you dies inside when, on the weekends when you run errands as a family, you have to drive your wife's minivan with the family stick figure sticker on the back. Part of the dad stick figure's arm is peeling off and nobody seems to notice. You could really use a beer right now.
Anonymous
Anonymous



Anonymous wrote:
DD-Iman
DS- Basiru


Is it terrible that I would like to think Iman has excellent posture?


Not at all. I bet Iman has lovely posture and big, beautiful brown eyes. Basiru will be a mean drum player and have a band when he's in high school. Oh yeah, and the kids like sushi and take cool fruit like jicama and star fruit in their lunches.
Anonymous
James and Charlie
Anonymous
Shaniqua
Laquanda
Bill
Anonymous
Oh my god, I just found this thread and am laughing hysterically. You guys are freaking hilarious geniuses!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Christopher
Cody
William (goes by Will)


You live in an Irish Catholic neighborhood in Silver Spring where the neighbors all make each other lasagnas when someone has a kid. You come from a lower SES than your husband. Your mom lives a few hours away in Pennsylvania. She hasn't aged well (and wears terrible mom jeans and flowery tank tops), and you worry you haven't escaped that fate. You drive a SUV that you think is classier than a minivan. You'd like to get in with a certain social set in DC so you encourage your sons to play lacrosse. You love having 3 boys.
Anonymous
Janessa
Meghan
Natalie
Tatum
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Alex
Nathan

Pretty please!!!


You and your husband are smart and have high EQs. You have good friends and are a compatible couple. You are in the international development field and feel passionate about what you do. Your husband's a lawyer and is active with human rights issues. You live in Virginia, even though you're pretty liberal. You want your sons to go to liberal arts colleges like you did.
Anonymous
Robert goes by "Robby"
Anonymous
India and Liam
Anonymous
Please do me!

Halcyon
Amelia
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Please do me!

Halcyon
Amelia


You are originally from the mid Atlantic area but moved to the West coast at some point in your childhood when your parents split up. You stayed in California through college (first junior college) and then moved back here because the job prospects are good. You dream of sailing around the world on a boat with your family, or at least just living abroad somewhere where you can see a sky full of stars at night. Your husband works in IT. Your kids are young but you can tell they're going to be dreamers too.
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