“School is not childcare”

[Anonymous]

How do you explain this nicely to your working sister who wants school to reopen full-time to take care of her 2 children?

I’ve been watching them and willing to continue but I just asked her to let me homeschool them like I do my own children so I’m not juggling their school online schedules. She refuses to even look into it and now her husband wrote me a strongly worded email about how homeschooling is good enough for my kids but not theirs. Okay, what do you think you are doing? We are all homeschooling now.

I just asked that she LOOK into it. So then I said that I may not be able to then watch them full-time and she now is demanding that our parents do, which they agreed. So her plan is to send them to school when it is open and then expose our parents when they are not. This makes no sense.

And no it is not a money issue. My sister maybe makes $40k at a nonprofit and my BIl easily makes half a mil in construction. Making us all her free sitters seems ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

What?

[Anonymous]

If you’re watching her kids then you are within your rights to say it’s too burdensome to have a different program for her kids than yours. But lay off on proselytizing about home schooling.
If your parents are up for it then it’s their decision.

[Anonymous]

The issue isn't childcare; the issue is that your sister is asking you to perform childcare in a way that doesn't work for your family. You need to tell her so.

This is a relationship issue only.

[Anonymous]

But for older kids, it is. Parents rely on school hours in order to go to work. I work nights and rely on DS being occupied at school between 8am (leave for bus) and 330pm (meet him at bus).

DH and I are managing with homeschooling. We are lucky that DH can work from home and DS is fairly independent. But if DH had a job where he couldn't work from home, we would be in trouble. As it is, DH is a bit grumpy because his work is interrupted by DS and I'm grumpy because I don't sleep as much.

There are many, many people who can't work right now because their kids are home 24/7 and they can't afford childcare/don't want to risk it.

That's obviously not your sisters situation but the whole "school is not childcare" notion is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

Agreed.

It’s the same people who shriek about how “I’m not taking care of anyone but my family” as though they don’t live in a society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

EXACTLY. Of course one of the functions that school serves is to take care of children. I, too, think DCUM is weirdly obsessed with thinking this isn't the case and there is something wrong with a parent who took a job assuming their kids would be in school during certain hours M-F.

[Anonymous]

This line from Bulworth:

"Ain't no education happenin up in that muthafuqqa"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This line from Bulworth:

"Ain't no education happenin up in that muthafuqqa"

Bawhahahahah!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you explain this nicely to your working sister who wants school to reopen full-time to take care of her 2 children?

I’ve been watching them and willing to continue but I just asked her to let me homeschool them like I do my own children so I’m not juggling their school online schedules. She refuses to even look into it and now her husband wrote me a strongly worded email about how homeschooling is good enough for my kids but not theirs. Okay, what do you think you are doing? We are all homeschooling now.

I just asked that she LOOK into it. So then I said that I may not be able to then watch them full-time and she now is demanding that our parents do, which they agreed. So her plan is to send them to school when it is open and then expose our parents when they are not. This makes no sense.

And no it is not a money issue. My sister maybe makes $40k at a nonprofit and my BIl easily makes half a mil in construction. Making us all her free sitters seems ridiculous.

You are way outside your lane. Tell your sister you can watch her kids if she wants you to homeschool them with yours but otherwise it is too difficult and you cannot.

What she and your parents choose to do if they do not take you up on your very generous offer is up to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

EXACTLY. Of course one of the functions that school serves is to take care of children. I, too, think DCUM is weirdly obsessed with thinking this isn't the case and there is something wrong with a parent who took a job assuming their kids would be in school during certain hours M-F.

Agree, particularly as the children are REQUIRED BY LAW to attend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

Not op. It shouldn't be. It's part of the crap basket this country has become that everyone has to have everything so people live so close to the edge financially that when something like this pandemic hits, those parents don't give a crap if their kids get sick or if teachers die. Both parents have to get back to work because they can't afford care for their kids if school isn't online.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

EXACTLY. Of course one of the functions that school serves is to take care of children. I, too, think DCUM is weirdly obsessed with thinking this isn't the case and there is something wrong with a parent who took a job assuming their kids would be in school during certain hours M-F.

+1 society is structured in certain ways, and we make choices that work with that structure. When that structure suddenly crashes, it's a problem. It sounds like your brother and SIL should send their kids to school (I'm going to) and then find a sitter or another alternative for afterschool. As the person watching the kids, you are right to create boundaries that work for you, but it's also unrealistic to think that your brother's family will switch to homeschooling just because it's your preference. Personally, I don't understand why families with resources can be so cheap about paying for aftercare, but it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:School is, of course, childcare, and our entire economy is built around that assumption. I have no idea why DCUM is obsessed with this fiction.

Not op. It shouldn't be. It's part of the crap basket this country has become that everyone has to have everything so people live so close to the edge financially that when something like this pandemic hits, those parents don't give a crap if their kids get sick or if teachers die. Both parents have to get back to work because they can't afford care for their kids if school isn't online.

Say what?