Pregnant Over 40/Unsupportive Husband
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Anonymous
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I’m seven months pregnant snd my husband has been distant during this pregnancy, which is our third. He said that he’s sure something is wrong with the baby because I’m 43 and he’s 46. I’ve had every test that exists and they all have come back as no problems. Has anyone here had a healthy baby over 41, no developmental or physical delays?
Thank you. |
Anonymous
| I had a child at 41 and at 44. They are now 10 and 7 and healthy and fine. You are far more likely to have a healthy child than an unhealthy child. |
Anonymous
| My SIL gave birth a half month after turning 43. The baby rolled over at 3.5 months old. He's got bright eyes and is thriving. |
Anonymous
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I was 44 when I had my son. He is a delight- smart, handsome, funny and fit. I was a nervous wreck and I did get HCG tested to rule out any genetic abnormality because one of the markers on a blood test needed further investigation.
I was so careful about nutrition and taking care of my health that the doctor was very surprised about the condition of my placenta. He remarked that the placenta had very little calcification or deterioration that he was seeing in younger moms who were unhealthy or gained too much weight. I had also banked the cord blood after my son was born because I was trying to cover all my bases. |
Anonymous
| What’s the hcg test? I had every single test offered by Gw’s genetic counselor. |
Anonymous
| I know more than I can count with healthy kids born to mothers over 41. Did he want this pregnancy? You're 7 months pregnant, it's a little late for him to be unsupportive and questioning the decision. |
Anonymous
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I think with all the benefits of modern living, good nutrition, supplements etc - women are in better health in their 40s nowadays in developed countries. I know too many moms who have had successful pregnancies and healthy children in late 30s and early 40s.
Stop worrying. It will be fine. And if it is not your first kid, this one will be a breeze. |
Anonymous
| My DH was born when his mom was 46, and he’s healthy, smart, focused, etc. His mom did have complications in childbirth and was in the hospital for several weeks. |
Anonymous
| I just had my fourth at 41 and husband 43 - had the easiest pregnancy of all. I can’t speak to complications down the road but so far this baby seems perfectly healthy. The risks go up SLIGHTLY with age ... it’s marginal. Also if you believe in alternative medicine, there are other reasons for many of the issues that previous posters brought up. I’ve seen plenty of ADHD kids born to younger parents. |
Anonymous
| He is not happy about having another child. Probably thought it couldn't possibly happen. Were you guys trying to have this baby or was it an accident? |
Anonymous
| Of course, many babies are born to moms over 40! Before birth control, most large families had a baby that was born when the mom was at or over 40! |
Anonymous
+1 I think this has to do with him not wanting another child, period. Not wanting to go through the baby years again, not wanting the financial or emotional stress, etc. He probably thought he was out of hte stressful baby years. |
Anonymous
| Sounds like he’s struggling with anxiety. |
Anonymous
| Uh I think the bigger issue is that his love and support is contingent on having a perfectly normal child. No such thing. Sounds like y’all need to see a counselor. It’s one thing for you to put up with it but that kind of behavior is severely damaging to children. |
Anonymous
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Have you tried acknowledging his fears and asking him to work through possible scenarios? Chances are everything is fine, but it’s worthwhile to explore what if’s.
FWIW, I had a child at 41. He’s a teen now, no issues. |