How to handle this cabin situation....

[Anonymous]

DH's family owns a cabin on a pond in the middle of nowhere in remote PA.
DH loves it. It is his special place.
I'm an ocean person and don't like this cabin or being so remote, but I go for him and then we also spend a weekend at the ocean in more of a seaside town.
Here's the issue - this year, even despite COVID, his whole family is planning on going over 4th of July weekend to this cabin.
Here is the setup:
Three families with two kids each plus his mother.
One tiny bathroom. No shower (outdoor). Plumbing is variable. You can't flush often; it's a compost toilet.
There are three bedrooms, two of which have no doors.
Then there's one main living room area and a porch.
His brother in law is on the spectrum somehow. He is really, really hard to spend sustained amounts of time with. He doesn't stop talking, interrupts, blares his own music without asking if anyone wants to hear it, tells seriously off-color jokes...he is just a LOT. In a small space. For many days. Like, in a group you can walk off, tune him out, ignore him, move to a different room....

There is LITERALLY nowhere to go unless you go in the water. You are constantly surrounded by other people in this teensy teensy space. There's nowhere even to walk; the cabin is down an unpaved dirt path with no town, no nothing, nearby. The ONLY store is a tiny convenience store in the center of town next to a gas pump.

I'm getting hives just thinking about it. DH is giddy at the prospect of spending a holiday on his beloved pond. I don't know what to do and if we go what to do to keep myself from snapping at BIL. Haaallp.

[Anonymous]

I would not go.

If you most go, bring camping tents and camp out. At least you'd have some privacy.

Pee in the woods.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not go.

If you most go, bring camping tents and camp out. At least you'd have some privacy.

Pee in the woods.

Bringing camping gear is actually a good suggestion. But rather than pee in the woods I'd get a small camping port-a-potty. If you buy a nice tent, and a small separate pop-up enclosure for the potty, it might be a comfortable alternative. That is only if there is room on the property to set up a tent. Altogether you might have to invest a couple of hundred bucks but it would be worth it since you could always use the equipment for some other purpose.

[Anonymous]

NOT HAPPENING.

You have the perfect excuse this year. It is much to risky with Covid-19 to be so close to so many people.

But honestly, I would never have agreed to going there with his family. Ever. And I love cabins in the woods, but not that much togetherness.

[Anonymous]

I feel for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not go.

If you most go, bring camping tents and camp out. At least you'd have some privacy.

Pee in the woods.

Bringing camping gear is actually a good suggestion. But rather than pee in the woods I'd get a small camping port-a-potty. If you buy a nice tent, and a small separate pop-up enclosure for the potty, it might be a comfortable alternative. That is only if there is room on the property to set up a tent. Altogether you might have to invest a couple of hundred bucks but it would be worth it since you could always use the equipment for some other purpose.

At a minimum you could setup an outdoor escape space for yourself. Get a room tent, one you can stand up in. Bring an inflatable mattress, bean bags, whatever and make it cozy.

[Anonymous]

hell no

refuse to go

[Anonymous]

NOPE. That sounds like a weekend of misery.

[Anonymous]

That sounds like hell on earth to me. The complete opposite of my type of vacation.

[Anonymous]

Let him go without you.

[Anonymous]

Even if there weren't a pandemic, I would not willingly subject myself to this. I get wanting to get together with family. I would go willingly if the accommodations were pleasing. What you describe is hell - and I say that as someone who grew up in a 2 bedroom/1 bathroom farmhouse with 4 siblings.

In these times, I would refuse to break self-isolation even if this were an ocean front house with a bed/bathroom for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not go.

If you most go, bring camping tents and camp out. At least you'd have some privacy.

Pee in the woods.

Bringing camping gear is actually a good suggestion. But rather than pee in the woods I'd get a small camping port-a-potty. If you buy a nice tent, and a small separate pop-up enclosure for the potty, it might be a comfortable alternative. That is only if there is room on the property to set up a tent. Altogether you might have to invest a couple of hundred bucks but it would be worth it since you could always use the equipment for some other purpose.

At a minimum you could setup an outdoor escape space for yourself. Get a room tent, one you can stand up in. Bring an inflatable mattress, bean bags, whatever and make it cozy.

All of this. Sleep in your own tents. Have the camping pop up and portapotty for your family. Also get a room tent for your family. I'd spend up to $1000 for all of the camping gear.

Why don't the bedrooms in the house have doors? Weird.

[Anonymous]

Other option, send DH and a kid or two.

[Anonymous]

No concerns about Covid 19, social distancing? I would refuse on this point alone. How could so many people think this was a good idea? Even if we never heard of Covid 19, this sounds like the week from Hell.

[Anonymous]

If you go buy a lot of raft/floaty things for the water.