I despise my MIL. Return to sender or just accept and not thank her.

[Anonymous]

I'm not getting into all of the reasons why I can't stand my MIL and refuse to have more than the most minimal necessary contact. I received a text message from MIL copying DH telling me about a gift she's sent me and when to expect it. I half expect it to be a blanket coughed on by a COVID-19 patient or similar.

Since I want nothing to do with this woman and definitely don't want to be perceived as accepting gifts from her, do I just write "return to sender" and put it back in the mailbox or do I just never acknowledge receiving it?

[Anonymous]

C) None of the above. You be the kinder person and say thank you for thinking of you on your birthday and if you really don’t want it around, you donate it when goodwill is open again.

Being kinder than someone deserves is never the wrong choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:C) None of the above. You be the kinder person and say thank you for thinking of you on your birthday and if you really don’t want it around, you donate it when goodwill is open again.

Being kinder than someone deserves is never the wrong choice.

OP here. Normally I would always do this but my MIL will weaponize it all somehow. I wish this weren't the case but it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:C) None of the above. You be the kinder person and say thank you for thinking of you on your birthday and if you really don’t want it around, you donate it when goodwill is open again.

Being kinder than someone deserves is never the wrong choice.

OP here. Normally I would always do this but my MIL will weaponize it all somehow. I wish this weren't the case but it is.

Writing return to sender will give her a lot more ammunition than a rote thank you.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why you wouldn't say thanks and accept it. Set it on fire later or whatever, but don't you think it'll cause a bigger problem if you refuse it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:C) None of the above. You be the kinder person and say thank you for thinking of you on your birthday and if you really don’t want it around, you donate it when goodwill is open again.

Being kinder than someone deserves is never the wrong choice.

OP here. Normally I would always do this but my MIL will weaponize it all somehow. I wish this weren't the case but it is.

Op, grow up. You won’t be seeing her in person for who knows how long. Plus she’ll probably go out with the virus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not getting into all of the reasons why I can't stand my MIL and refuse to have more than the most minimal necessary contact. I received a text message from MIL copying DH telling me about a gift she's sent me and when to expect it. I half expect it to be a blanket coughed on by a COVID-19 patient or similar.

Since I want nothing to do with this woman and definitely don't want to be perceived as accepting gifts from her, do I just write "return to sender" and put it back in the mailbox or do I just never acknowledge receiving it?

Have you or your DH directly told her that you want no contact? If you have, no response required. If you have not, why not?

[Anonymous]

You sound really horrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not getting into all of the reasons why I can't stand my MIL and refuse to have more than the most minimal necessary contact. I received a text message from MIL copying DH telling me about a gift she's sent me and when to expect it. I half expect it to be a blanket coughed on by a COVID-19 patient or similar.

Since I want nothing to do with this woman and definitely don't want to be perceived as accepting gifts from her, do I just write "return to sender" and put it back in the mailbox or do I just never acknowledge receiving it?

Have you or your DH directly told her that you want no contact? If you have, no response required. If you have not, why not?

I don't tell DH what to do about his level of contact with her. He cut her off for a few years but has let her back in. I ignore her completely. I actually have her blocked (so I thought) but maybe she got around it by making it a group message?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound really horrible.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not getting into all of the reasons why I can't stand my MIL and refuse to have more than the most minimal necessary contact. I received a text message from MIL copying DH telling me about a gift she's sent me and when to expect it. I half expect it to be a blanket coughed on by a COVID-19 patient or similar.

Since I want nothing to do with this woman and definitely don't want to be perceived as accepting gifts from her, do I just write "return to sender" and put it back in the mailbox or do I just never acknowledge receiving it?

Have you or your DH directly told her that you want no contact? If you have, no response required. If you have not, why not?

I don't tell DH what to do about his level of contact with her. He cut her off for a few years but has let her back in. I ignore her completely. I actually have her blocked (so I thought) but maybe she got around it by making it a group message?

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

new phone Who dis?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound really horrible.

+1

Agree, and also agree that you need to grow up.

[Anonymous]

You should lighten up on MIL, you sound crazy.

[Anonymous]

Just don't acknowledge it, stick the box in the garage and don't open it. Problem solved. Don't facilitate drama by doing the return to sender thing.