Things you secretly oppose, but don't want other people to know:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of white people (including, obviously, many on this board) prefer to live near, socialize with and marry only other white people.

But I suppose that's different somehow?

If I moved to France because of their opportunities, you bet your ass I would attempt to learn the language and get to know French people and embrace parts of their culture. I would not go find the one neighborhood and school that caters to Americans, only associate with the Americans at work and essentially attempt to recreate the US in France.

Then you would be in the very rare minority. In most countries where I've lived, the Americans live in one area (usually the one surrounded by walls and armed guards), send their kids to the American school, arrange celebrations at 4th of July and Thanksgiving, and socialize only with select locals (other than the ones they pay to maintain their lifestyle). They never learn the language.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of white people (including, obviously, many on this board) prefer to live near, socialize with and marry only other white people.

But I suppose that's different somehow?

If I moved to France because of their opportunities, you bet your ass I would attempt to learn the language and get to know French people and embrace parts of their culture. I would not go find the one neighborhood and school that caters to Americans, only associate with the Americans at work and essentially attempt to recreate the US in France.

Then you would be in the very rare minority. In most countries where I've lived, the Americans live in one area (usually the one surrounded by walls and armed guards), send their kids to the American school, arrange celebrations at 4th of July and Thanksgiving, and socialize only with select locals (other than the ones they pay to maintain their lifestyle). They never learn the language.

That's utterly bizarre to me and maybe why I have such issue with seeing that happen here. Why live somewhere if you're not at all willing to be a part of that society? Just stay where you're from in that case! It smacks of elitism and ungratefulness.

[Anonymous]

Im guessing you aren't an immigrant, and that being an immigrant or an expat is not a realistic possibility for you, which gives you all the freedom to talk about moving to France and living happily among the French.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of white people (including, obviously, many on this board) prefer to live near, socialize with and marry only other white people.

But I suppose that's different somehow?

If I moved to France because of their opportunities, you bet your ass I would attempt to learn the language and get to know French people and embrace parts of their culture. I would not go find the one neighborhood and school that caters to Americans, only associate with the Americans at work and essentially attempt to recreate the US in France.

Then you would be in the very rare minority. In most countries where I've lived, the Americans live in one area (usually the one surrounded by walls and armed guards), send their kids to the American school, arrange celebrations at 4th of July and Thanksgiving, and socialize only with select locals (other than the ones they pay to maintain their lifestyle). They never learn the language.

From your description it sounds like you're talking about war-torn countries in the Middle East & Africa? Are you?

[Anonymous]

In several cases, yes. But I have friends living in effective American isolation in England, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Im guessing you aren't an immigrant, and that being an immigrant or an expat is not a realistic possibility for you, which gives you all the freedom to talk about moving to France and living happily among the French.

Actually, my dad was in the military when I was younger. I spent years living overseas. My parents chose to live off base, in apartments in the the cities with the Germans and the Japanese. We had Japanese friends, ate at Japanese restaurants, shopped at our San-A Japanese grocery store, and didn't just confine ourself to the base with the Americans. And when I travel now, I seek out the most authentic experience I can and don't look to be given special treatment for being American. So yes, I know of what I speak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In several cases, yes. But I have friends living in effective American isolation in England, too.

I have seen this too. I went to grad school in Englan. It's quite common when, in a foreign environment, to gravitate towards what you know, to people who do things the same way you do, to people who understand your cultural references and ways of doing things, etc. I found that the English-speaking country kids stuck together (the British, the Irish, the Canadians, the Americans, the Australians). . . then the French stuck together (sometimes hanging out with the Francophile Canadians who could also speak French). . . .the Germans hung out together. . .the Pakistani/Indian/Malaysians stuck together (they all wore flip flops in the dorms all the time and hung out and watched cricket in the common room). . . . the Hong Kong kids stuck together and made Chinese food in the communal kitchen. . .the Middle Easterners hung out together. . . the Muslims hung out together and did prayers 5 x a day. . . . I want to say all of the different nationalities all gravitated towards those who looked like them, did things the way they did, spoke the way they did, dressed the way they did, ate the way they did, etc. This is very, very common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In several cases, yes. But I have friends living in effective American isolation in England, too.

NP here. In my experience, the English are not exactly the warmest people; Middle Easterners were much more so. I've lived in both places.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of white people (including, obviously, many on this board) prefer to live near, socialize with and marry only other white people.

But I suppose that's different somehow?

If I moved to France because of their opportunities, you bet your ass I would attempt to learn the language and get to know French people and embrace parts of their culture. I would not go find the one neighborhood and school that caters to Americans, only associate with the Americans at work and essentially attempt to recreate the US in France.

Then you would be in the very rare minority. In most countries where I've lived, the Americans live in one area (usually the one surrounded by walls and armed guards), send their kids to the American school, arrange celebrations at 4th of July and Thanksgiving, and socialize only with select locals (other than the ones they pay to maintain their lifestyle). They never learn the language.

That's utterly bizarre to me and maybe why I have such issue with seeing that happen here. Why live somewhere if you're not at all willing to be a part of that society? Just stay where you're from in that case! It smacks of elitism and ungratefulness.

Let's be clear, the previous poster is referring to military families living on base or neighborhoods by the base. That's hardly the same thing.

[Anonymous]

No, I was talking about expats -foreign service, corporate - people who choose where they live. Although, to be fair, they are often channeled into specific communities by their employer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Indians. Can't stand them-especially if they are my neighbor. I have NEVR seen one that takes any pride in their home. They are property value destroyers.

Do you mean Native Americans? Or Indians from India? All of the Indians I know and live by have nicer yards and houses than anyone in the neighborhood. They have tremendous pride in things. Your post is weird.

+1. My Indian friends all have very, very well-maintained homes and yards.

+2. Several Indian friends who have beautifully maintained homes and take tremendous pride in their homes and yards. I think PP is a bigot.

Np here. I agree with the first pp. I think she maybe referring to the poorer ones? The Indians I have seen in the poorer communities do not upkeep their yard and have roaches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

So the only choice is the United States? I mean, if I didn't have the grades to have graduated from Harvard, would I have?

The U.S. is NOT the only choice. First generation here.

So only you are smart enough, special enough to have the opportunity to do well in life? Since you got here first, apparently this place it finally perfect, so we can all go to hell now? Wow, just wow.

I'm not the PP but let's face it, we can't just let everyone in. We just can't. Sorry, but we can not be the world's homeless shelter and soup kitchen. We can only financially support so many people. We can't even promise that those of us who paid into the social security system are going to be able to collect. We keep raising the age to collect so that more people will die off before they can get their money back. Why should we let more people in that we can't support? Lets figure out how to support the good citizens we have, deport the people who are not here legally AND can't contribute and support themselves AND get rid of those who are f-ing up, causing problems and costing us more $. For those who may have come illegally but are good, contributing members of society, then let's have a path to citizenship. But We need to stop letting in people we can't support, who drain resources from those who have earned them and who we have no room for. Our infrastructure is crumbling under the weight of the population that's already here, dammit.

I have been paying into the system since the day I started working in this country 13 years ago. I have advanced degrees and work to support myself. I pay taxes and always will. But apparently that doesn't matter.

That may be true but you are not the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I oppose parents financing large portions of their grown children's lives. Yes, this includes down payments on houses and paying for grandkids' tuition.

Why should you care if grandparents pay for their grandchild's tuition?

Exactly. Especially if that frees up scholarship money or financial aid that could go to someone else. Odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I was talking about expats -foreign service, corporate - people who choose where they live. Although, to be fair, they are often channeled into specific communities by their employer.

We were expats who lived in Kuwait prior to the Gulf Wars. We lived in a compound, but it wasn't an American compound- it was full of all nationalities- Europeans, Asians, other Arabs, and Americans. Kuwait was a country of the haves and have-nots. We lived in a compound because it was much cheaper than living in a palatial estate like the Kuwaitis did. We did go to the American School of Kuwait, but so did all the other non-Kuwaitis else- it was either that or a French or Kuwaiti school and we didn't speak Arabic or French. We made lots of friends, but it was difficult at times for my mom being a woman- she was harrassed a lot, even though she is a very conservative dresser. There were times when men would run her off the road b/c she was a woman driving.

Having said that, it was a wonderful place to spend a childhood and I have a lot of great memories.

[Anonymous]

To be fair, foreign service and military families move every 2-3 years. It's not realistic to expect the kids to learn a new language this often, so that's why American schools exist.

I do know insulated American communities in Europe who are not FS or military.