Revenge Affair
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Anonymous
| Recently discovered DH’s affair. I have the contact of the AP’s spouse. Considering offering myself to him. I know this is a bad idea but why should DH get to live in fantasyland. |
Anonymous
| Ewww. |
Anonymous
| wth |
Anonymous
|
If you've discovered the affair recently, your head is not the right place. So I am going to tell you the reality of the "revenge affair."
The only way to have a revenge affair and have it feel good long-term (and not regret after) is to make it completely, utterly secret, far removed from your daily life and people you know, so that it is truly something ONLY FOR YOU. If your affair becomes public in any way, you will lose whatever high ground you currently have. Your husband will lose all respect for you. Yes I know you might be in a mood to break stuff right now but you may regret it later. It's extremely difficult to come back from. Don't make your affair public. Also, the AP's spouse will have zero interest in sleeping with you. They will be too shocked by the news to have anything left for you. So that you will be hurt by rejection in addition to the affair. Don't do it. Not because of any moral reason, but because it is guaranteed to feel bad for you in a whole variety of ways. |
Anonymous
| Bang his most slutty friend not OWs H... make it a 3-some. |
Anonymous
|
My wife had an affair. I didn't want to lose my marriage and access to kids so we are working on it. We have already discussed that if I felt the need to step out myself she would forgive me.
And I have. A couple times. She hasn't found out and I will keep going till she does. I kind of get the appeal of these now. |
Anonymous
kinda +1 definitely more appealing to do this outside of your/DH's home zone. be it a simple M-F affair or a 3-some (MFM), you get to play out whatever kink/fantasy you want an on your terms. maybe video tape/pics of the romp for you to keep and to use as an Ace card in the future. I don't know, maybe I'm just super vindictive. |
Anonymous
|
I have some neighbors who went through this kind of thing exactly as you describe. Both couples ended up divorcing and marrying the affair partners. Five years later, both (new) couples still going strong.
Happy ending? |
Anonymous
My best friend from grad school did exactly this too. Although both new couples are remarried and together, it's anything but happy. |
Anonymous
I have never thought an affair was worth throwing away my security and intact family, but I would slut it up big time. The only way I could ever forgive is to get some on my side. |
Anonymous
| Troll fail. |
Anonymous
I couldn’t imagine needing to degrade myself to that level of trashy behavior, and certainly not because of extreme hurt and disloyalty that someone showed me by cheating as a spouse. Why would I give them that power over me? Why would I build that narrative for my children? You can just start a discussion about the idea of revenge affairs without starting a trolling post. They would cause greater wounds. It would be two wrongs, more complexity on a shitty mess to begin with. |
Anonymous
|
When my ex cheated, I thought about a revenge affair. But, truthfully, I’m not that kind of person. I’m honest and transparent - not manipulative. Why would I let my then DH’s behavior dictate my life? Had I sunk to his level, it would have been his victory. It would have normalized what he did.
Instead, I decided what *I* really wanted for myself and my kids, and it wasn’t him. |
Anonymous
Will you tell DH about it? Maybe take pics and show him. |
Anonymous
| Why would you want to have an affair with a stranger? Find somebody you like. |