Moms secretly want 3+ kids but dads veto more than 2

[Anonymous]

I see a trend among friends and family. It seems like most women would try for a third child, even if they thought they’d have to make some sacrifices. But the men are unwilling to rock the boat and only agree to two children, MAX. Why do so many self proclaimed feminists, modern women, continue to let the men around them control their reproductive choices?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see a trend among friends and family. It seems like most women would try for a third child, even if they thought they’d have to make some sacrifices. But the men are unwilling to rock the boat and only agree to two children, MAX. Why do so many self proclaimed feminists, modern women, continue to let the men around them control their reproductive choices?

Part of being a feminist, modern woman is not forcing your partner to parent more children than he feels he can do well.

[Anonymous]

Most of the women of 3+ kids bitterly complain about their husbands not doing enough even though they need to earn the income. Its much more expensive with three, especially college.

[Anonymous]

Oh FFS. Why would you have child with someone who didn’t want that child? Why would you do that to a kid?

This is not a feminist issue.

[Anonymous]

It was the reverse for us. I wanted 2 and DH secretly wanted 3.

[Anonymous]

We both only wanted two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It was the reverse for us. I wanted 2 and DH secretly wanted 3.

Same, though it's no secret. We have two, he wants another. It's absolutely not happening. We're done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It was the reverse for us. I wanted 2 and DH secretly wanted 3.

Similar here. Dh not-so-secretely wanted 4. I’m old, two was as many as we could realistically hope for. I don’t think he understood how much work kids are though. Two is plenty for us.

[Anonymous]

The no vote is the final vote. Doesn't matter if it's the woman or the man. If both don't agree to another child, the answer must be no, in fairness to the child.

[Anonymous]

Dh wanted way more kids than me.

In my friends group it’s the women with terrible husbands that stopped at 1. They knew their husbands sucked and didn’t want to get divorced by having 2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The no vote is the final vote. Doesn't matter if it's the woman or the man. If both don't agree to another child, the answer must be no, in fairness to the child.

This.

[Anonymous]

there are lots of men who want “big families”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:there are lots of men who want “big families”

That the women end up raising.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:there are lots of men who want “big families”

Yeah, some men say that when dating, but after becoming a dad they change their tune. Too lazy for a third.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see a trend among friends and family. It seems like most women would try for a third child, even if they thought they’d have to make some sacrifices. But the men are unwilling to rock the boat and only agree to two children, MAX. Why do so many self proclaimed feminists, modern women, continue to let the men around them control their reproductive choices?

Are you trying to sound stupid, OP? No one is controlling anyone. If she wants to have a third child, she is more than welcome to divorce, find another partner or sperm donor, and have a third child. And if a husband wants a third child, but his wife doesn’t, he is welcome to divorce her, find another partner and have a third child.