daughter's dramatics when being corrected/disciplined

[Anonymous]

After being corrected/disciplined (and I'm NOT talking any sort of severe punishment) she'll say stuff like "I know you hate me, why don't you just say it?" or "wouldn't your life be easier if I were never born? Just think, you'd never have to deal with any of this."

I don't know what to do.

[Anonymous]

Ignore.

When DD was a pre-schooler and was disciplined, she used to say, “You hurt my feelings! Apologize!” I could barely stifle the laugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ignore.

When DD was a pre-schooler and was disciplined, she used to say, “You hurt my feelings! Apologize!” I could barely stifle the laugh.

LOL

[Anonymous]

Ask her why she feels that way?

[Anonymous]

"You're trying to provoke me, dear. Remember that if you succeed, the one who loses is YOU."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
"You're trying to provoke me, dear. Remember that if you succeed, the one who loses is YOU."

[Anonymous]

I know it's dramatic, over the top, silly, etc. But these are real emotions that a real person is feeling. This is her reaction, so try to take a breath, take it in, and respond in the most present, mature, compassionate way that you can.

I will never, ever forget a time when I was genuinely trying to tell my dad that something he said had hurt me. He laughed at me. To this day, I think it's the worst I've ever felt, and I've suffered some true losses and difficulties over the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
"You're trying to provoke me, dear. Remember that if you succeed, the one who loses is YOU."

Good response.

Or "stop the dramatics, it changes nothing".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's dramatic, over the top, silly, etc. But these are real emotions that a real person is feeling. This is her reaction, so try to take a breath, take it in, and respond in the most present, mature, compassionate way that you can.

I will never, ever forget a time when I was genuinely trying to tell my dad that something he said had hurt me. He laughed at me. To this day, I think it's the worst I've ever felt, and I've suffered some true losses and difficulties over the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's dramatic, over the top, silly, etc. But these are real emotions that a real person is feeling. This is her reaction, so try to take a breath, take it in, and respond in the most present, mature, compassionate way that you can.

I will never, ever forget a time when I was genuinely trying to tell my dad that something he said had hurt me. He laughed at me. To this day, I think it's the worst I've ever felt, and I've suffered some true losses and difficulties over the years.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's dramatic, over the top, silly, etc. But these are real emotions that a real person is feeling. This is her reaction, so try to take a breath, take it in, and respond in the most present, mature, compassionate way that you can.

I will never, ever forget a time when I was genuinely trying to tell my dad that something he said had hurt me. He laughed at me. To this day, I think it's the worst I've ever felt, and I've suffered some true losses and difficulties over the years.

I responded earlier.

There's a big difference between laughing and not playing into her drama.

Op, talk to her about it AFTER she calms down. You'll get nothing but more drama in the moment. When she has calmed down ask her why she said that. Maybe she equates even minor punishment as you not liking/wanting her. Maybe.

It's also entirely possible she's trying to deflect.

We were in family counseling. 17 year old ds would come out with similar. The counselor told him he (ds) knew that wasn't true, so cut the crap.

[Anonymous]

OMG Have some sympathy -- eye rollers.

I think as a parent it's YOUR JOB to handle your child with all the grace you are able.

Sounds like your daughter's a smart one. No one said it would be easy!

[Anonymous]

Does your DD say this at any other time than punishment?

If so, it's an issue to be dealt with.

If not, then I would say to her "You tell me that every time I punish you, Larla." Period. Go on with the discipline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it's dramatic, over the top, silly, etc. But these are real emotions that a real person is feeling. This is her reaction, so try to take a breath, take it in, and respond in the most present, mature, compassionate way that you can.

I will never, ever forget a time when I was genuinely trying to tell my dad that something he said had hurt me. He laughed at me. To this day, I think it's the worst I've ever felt, and I've suffered some true losses and difficulties over the years.

I responded earlier.

There's a big difference between laughing and not playing into her drama.

Op, talk to her about it AFTER she calms down. You'll get nothing but more drama in the moment. When she has calmed down ask her why she said that. Maybe she equates even minor punishment as you not liking/wanting her. Maybe.

It's also entirely possible she's trying to deflect.

We were in family counseling. 17 year old ds would come out with similar. The counselor told him he (ds) knew that wasn't true, so cut the crap.

I never said to play into their drama.

I simply said to remain in control and respond in the best way possible; it's easy to get caught up in heightened emotions and to respond in a "big" way. My advice simply was to find a way to remain cool and in control.

[Anonymous]

I would probably say “I love you very much, I always have and I always will. How much I love you doesn’t have to do with how this consequence was chosen.”