Blended Families and College Tuition

[Anonymous]

Just curious how this is handled in other families when there is no court ordered tuition support.
A few general questions:
How early did you start the discussion about tuition with the CP/NCP?
What type of arrangement did you make with CP/NCP?
Was your spouse supportive of the arrangement with CP/NCP?
What do you wish you had done differently?
Do you have any advice to share?

[Anonymous]

Kids are not in colledge yet, but the expectation is for the bio paprents to provide support. I suggest bringing this topic up at your earliest convenience.

[Anonymous]

What is CP/NCP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is CP/NCP?

Custodial parent (has child is his or her home more than 50% of the time). Non-custodial parent (child doesn’t actually live with this parent).

[Anonymous]

DH was NCP. I have 2 biological children and 2 non biological children. Therefore I have 4 children.

The conversation went something like—next year is going to suck, we’ve got 1 going to college, 1 in Hs, 1 in preschool and 1 in daycare. When are tuition checks due?

[Anonymous]

Just my personal experience, but....

I think it can’t be just one conversation. It has to be multiple conversations over the years. I have 2 bio kids (from prior) and 1 step.

I fully supported that DH funded SS’s education because his ex was not in a position to do so., I have contributed toward other expenses related to SS being in college and now law school.

My XH is unlikely to ever pay a cent in tuition for our last kid together. He didn’t for the older one. I know what our court agreement says, but he’s been chronically late with CS and is currently unemployed.

As a result, DH and I have an ongoing discussion with each other, exes, and the student child.

[Anonymous]

My spouse was CP. We pool all of our finances for our family. Ex has zero assets being completely incapable of managing funds. Spouse and I paid for college for my stepchild.

[Anonymous]

I am the CP and the primary breadwinner in my new family. My divorce agreement says that each parent is obligated to pay 1/2 of the in-state cost of attendance (at the time of divorce we did not want to shackle ourselves to more than that). Kid #1 got into one of the top schools, NCP kicked in a bit more, but I will likely end up paying about 3/4 of the costs. Kid #2 is aiming at a state school, if she gets in, we’ll split the bill in half. My spouse grumbled a bit about the costs for the oldest kid, but since I earn more, I made the decision.

[Anonymous]

Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

This is one reason DH and I waited to marry. We each had a child in college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

I'm dating divorced dads a lot and worry about this. I have a large trust but I don't think it allows me to use the money for a step kid's tuition, but I am worried my assets will screw up financial aid. The kids are only in junior high school. Neither of their parents make or have a ton of money. What's the deal with financial aid and a step parent's assets?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

I'm dating divorced dads a lot and worry about this. I have a large trust but I don't think it allows me to use the money for a step kid's tuition, but I am worried my assets will screw up financial aid. The kids are only in junior high school. Neither of their parents make or have a ton of money. What's the deal with financial aid and a step parent's assets?

It may vary by state and school so I suggest you get professional advice and be mentally and financially prepared to pay for the difference. A child should not have to pay financially for parents' romantic choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

I'm dating divorced dads a lot and worry about this. I have a large trust but I don't think it allows me to use the money for a step kid's tuition, but I am worried my assets will screw up financial aid. The kids are only in junior high school. Neither of their parents make or have a ton of money. What's the deal with financial aid and a step parent's assets?

With this being a HCOL area and salaries being commensurately higher than other areas of the country it is unlikely the children will qualify for financial aid unless the guys you're dating are very low earners or the kids are superstars and get into a place like Harvard that has very generous financial aid criteria.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

I'm dating divorced dads a lot and worry about this. I have a large trust but I don't think it allows me to use the money for a step kid's tuition, but I am worried my assets will screw up financial aid. The kids are only in junior high school. Neither of their parents make or have a ton of money. What's the deal with financial aid and a step parent's assets?

With this being a HCOL area and salaries being commensurately higher than other areas of the country it is unlikely the children will qualify for financial aid unless the guys you're dating are very low earners or the kids are superstars and get into a place like Harvard that has very generous financial aid criteria.

Pp here. My current boyfriend only makes around 100k and his ex around 60. They split custody. With just that, I think they would qualify for grants, loans etc no? My trust income can vary depending on the investments, but the terms of the trust are such that I can't stand end it on step kids tuition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don't remarry in such a way that your child loses their eligibility for financial aid. If you do, make up the difference to your child. Otherwise your blended family will de-blend.

I'm dating divorced dads a lot and worry about this. I have a large trust but I don't think it allows me to use the money for a step kid's tuition, but I am worried my assets will screw up financial aid. The kids are only in junior high school. Neither of their parents make or have a ton of money. What's the deal with financial aid and a step parent's assets?

With this being a HCOL area and salaries being commensurately higher than other areas of the country it is unlikely the children will qualify for financial aid unless the guys you're dating are very low earners or the kids are superstars and get into a place like Harvard that has very generous financial aid criteria.

Pp here. My current boyfriend only makes around 100k and his ex around 60. They split custody. With just that, I think they would qualify for grants, loans etc no? My trust income can vary depending on the investments, but the terms of the trust are such that I can't stand end it on step kids tuition.

The kid would be eligible for some aid, then. It doesn't really matter how you do it, as long as the young person does not have to take on additional debt as a result of your choice to marry. That's a horrible thing to do to a person just beginning their adult life.