DD got punished for peeing on the grass in the playground

[Anonymous]

DD attends PK3 in a DCPS charter school. Today during recess she wanted to pee and apparently there was no teacher around (this is what she told me), she peed on the grass in front of other kids, the kids reported her to the teacher (teachers didn't see her peeing) and she got punished. She had to leave the playground immediately and go stay alone in the class (with one teacher). She wasn't happy because she didn't understand what she did wrong.

When we go to park for a hike or anywhere where there is no toilet we let her pee on the grass in a remote area. I understand that what she did was wrong, but I was surprised she got punished, I thought maybe a warning would have been ok and tell her you don't do that. Both teachers complained to me as soon I got there and my daughter was still very upset. I think it was huge drama at school because of that and she was confused an embarrassed. We are European and this will not be a big deal where we come from. Also I have seen a few American friends of us let their toddlers pee on the grass/tree in case of emergency.

I will talk to her and we will make sure this doesn't happen again, but is it me or this was blown out of proportion? also what do you guys do if your kid need to pee and there is no toilet around? She is fully potty trained so we don't carry the travel potty around anymore.

PS: I am not making any excuses, I am just chocked it was such a big deal.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think at three years old she needs to be “punished” per se. I do think there’s a difference between just peeing in front of everyone and trying to go to the side or to a tree etc.

[Anonymous]

There had to be teachers around at recess. Doesn’t seem like she even bothered to go look for one. You can’t just cop a squat wherever and whenever you feel like it. This is not the same situation as needing to pee when hiking.

[Anonymous]

I can understand why they do not want it done on purpose and would discourage intentional peeing because that's kind of gross on the playground where kids play around all the time and roll on the grass. But I don't think any 3 yo should be punished for it, just tell her the proper procedure. It's also common for them to have accidents.

[Anonymous]

I can understand why the teachers thought this was odd and inappropriate. Presumably, your child had to remove her underwear in order to pee on the grass, right? I think the teachers would have been right to tell her not to do this, and to talk to you about it. Punishing her seems inappropriate, assuming that this is the first time this occurred and they had not discussed it with her and you previously.

[Anonymous]

OP Here, this is the first time this happened. I wonder: if the teachers were around when this happened, how did none of them (2 teachers and one assistant) noticed when she squatted, took underwear off, peed, put underwear back on? I talked to both teacher and they didn't see anything but they came later to investigate and saw the pee stain.

And Yes I agree she shouldn't do that and we talked about it.

[Anonymous]

I’d be more concerned about the lack of supervision. The response is also bizarre. I’d be thinking this isn’t the best childcare situation.

[Anonymous]

I think their reaction is reasonable, as long as they didn't also shame her. Imagine all the other kids going home tonight and telling mommy they saw Larla pee on the grass today. Need to nip that in the bud.

[Anonymous]

My kid (and his friend) got in trouble in PK3 for the same thing.

He wasn't able to articulate things later, but as he recalls it now, he didn't want to use the school bathroom anymore, because there were no stalls - just open toilets so that teachers could help kids if needed - and he was just old enough to want privacy. So he and his friend peed behind the play structure a couple of times.

Is there any kind of issue with access to/privacy within your kid's school bathroom that might make her want to pee on the playground instead of using it? Just a thought.

[Anonymous]

People only let their kid do that when there is absolutely no way to get to a bathroom. At school, you tell the teacher you need to go to the bathroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There had to be teachers around at recess. Doesn’t seem like she even bothered to go look for one. You can’t just cop a squat wherever and whenever you feel like it. This is not the same situation as needing to pee when hiking.

This, you don't do that at school and failed to teach her there is a time and place for it.

[Anonymous]

Let it go. It will be a great story to tell her prom date while he waits for her to finish getting ready.

[Anonymous]

She absolutely should not have been punished for a first time “offense”. The school is wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let it go. It will be a great story to tell her prom date while he waits for her to finish getting ready.

This wins for creepiest and most inappropriate response ever. I'm sure it was meant jokingly, but I hate "jokes" about humiliating our teenage girls with childhood stories about their private parts to males in their lives.

[Anonymous]

I think it's inappropriate for them to have made her go inside as a punishment. I'd have been like, "so let me get this straight, there was so little supervision that she was able to take off her underwear, pee, put it back on, all while no body noticed she was legit getting NAKED on the playground.... and so little supervision that she couldn't find a teacher to ask about going inside to use the bathroom.... but there was enough supervision for one of those 3 teachers to then LEAVE THE PLAYGROUND with her and have the group watched by just 2 adults?"