What the hell is wrong with these dance moms and teachers! It’s striper training

[Anonymous]

Ok- so new to this dance thing- my daughter is 11 and I’m a pretty with it mom- but have these people lost their minds! It’s like a cult. And the outfits and dance moves are often beyond ridiculous.
These people are crazy- do they realize this is more like the pageant category than anything remotely athletic. I’m biting my tongue at these silly dance competitions—my daughter loves it- but as an educated normal working women- I am stressing to my daughter this is a fun activity to help learn dance for school dance team- but the makeup and outfits are just for fun and this is not a life time profession.
Our studio is pretty chill and outfits and moves appropriate- and they actually score well- although with 700 trophies doesn’t everyone???-but these little girs!! For real! And when your 8 year old is performing stripper moves, please use your head and talk to your dance teacher. No it’s actually not cute- it’s gross!
Signed- never be crazy dance mom.
And by the way, paying 500 dollars to compete means this is purely a business - not a true competition on skill.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for sharing. You certainly have a lot of feelings.

[Anonymous]

Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

[Anonymous]

You say DD loves it; they mostly all love doing anything with friends at her age. Does she love dance for dance's sake and is she learning solid, advancing dance skills, or is the focus on winning trophies?

If it all really bothers you and you think DD would dance regardless of competitions, you can always pull your DD from the competitive dance circuit. Find another studio that has strong jazz and/or hip-hop classes but does not compete. There ARE such studios, OP, ones where dancers perform at recitals etc. but not in competitions. You might get flak from the coach and other parents at the current studio about her "letting down the team," "not being a team player" etc. but ignore it. If there is a point soon when the competition season ends, use that point to leave the current studio.

DD should get her say, though. One thing to note if she just started out: Increasingly competitions will require more and more of her weekends and more and more travel so they'll prevent her from trying other activities as she gets older. If she truly loves it that's fine. If not, she may eventually want to stop once the time and travel commitments grow.

I'm not anti-competitive dance but it's not for every kid or every family, because it's a family commitment too. A lot depends on how the coach runs the team and if dancers feel supported or pressured.

[Anonymous]

DD started on a competitive dance team... but she was always more into ballet and the lyrical stuff. She had a solo in 4th grade and was at the top of her class, taking the teen ballet class. However, she just wasn't outgoing and uncomfortable playing the part of a sassy girl onstage, especially in competitions. And as a parent, some of the moves the girls were doing were a little bit over the top. I agree with you, OP. It's the cost and the stress and the commitment and level of comfort and community.

And the moms! and the costumes and competition and drama! Regardless of what people say, there is a ton of drama in the competitive dance world. It's about who's better than who and who's friends with who and who's got the higher extension and who's going to get a solo and the special recognition. I just didn't want to put up with their bs.

At some point, it got to be too much and her teacher was bullying her for being too shy. There was also some teacher drama in addition to the standard level of craziness, which didn't help. I made the choice to leave the studio and enrolled DD in a classical ballet school, which really focuses on technique. She was worried that she wouldn't get the same level of intensity and fun and explosive classes with all the fast moves and cool tricks, but she learned that there's more to dance than 'stripper moves.' I'm not saying that competition dance doesn't teach technique, I'm saying that it focuses on appearances more than classical dance. There's a very distinct, different mindset.

All in all, OP, I agree. DD is now glad we made the switch but lately she's figured out that she's more interested in academics than dance, but we'll see. The competitive dance world isn't for everyone, but it's still tons of fun and amazing-- if you have the time, money, and intensity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You say DD loves it; they mostly all love doing anything with friends at her age. Does she love dance for dance's sake and is she learning solid, advancing dance skills, or is the focus on winning trophies?

If it all really bothers you and you think DD would dance regardless of competitions, you can always pull your DD from the competitive dance circuit. Find another studio that has strong jazz and/or hip-hop classes but does not compete. There ARE such studios, OP, ones where dancers perform at recitals etc. but not in competitions. You might get flak from the coach and other parents at the current studio about her "letting down the team," "not being a team player" etc. but ignore it. If there is a point soon when the competition season ends, use that point to leave the current studio.

DD should get her say, though. One thing to note if she just started out: Increasingly competitions will require more and more of her weekends and more and more travel so they'll prevent her from trying other activities as she gets older. If she truly loves it that's fine. If not, she may eventually want to stop once the time and travel commitments grow.

I'm not anti-competitive dance but it's not for every kid or every family, because it's a family commitment too. A lot depends on how the coach runs the team and if dancers feel supported or pressured.

Agree, go to a legitimate studio that is focused on technique. I"m lucky to live near an amazing community-based hip-hop studio. I have loved every kid and adult performance I've gone to and you can absolutely see the difference in skill, technique, and joy in the craft.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

Its ‘stripper’ - learn to spell.
And no - it’s not stripper training. Maybe you need better medication.

[Anonymous]

I agree. Even in standard gym competitions, there's lots of make-up - WHY would 8 year old gymnasts need make-up?????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its ‘stripper’ - learn to spell.
And no - it’s not stripper training. Maybe you need better medication.

Spoken like a true stripper-

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

Well said.

I disagree with both of your flawed logic. Just because a sport is diverse and accepting, just because the young children themselves are having fun (because they're too young to realize how they look to the world), we should allow these kids to present themselves in a suggestive or sexual way, or at least in away that's not age-appropriate? Pardon me? You think that moral ambiguity can be compensated by other things?

No. That line of reasoning is flat out wrong, and it leads to unfortunate cases of abuse, like in Olympic gymnastics. "My child doesn't like her doctor but she's an Olympic gymnast so it's all good" kind of reasoning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok- so new to this dance thing- my daughter is 11 and I’m a pretty with it mom- but have these people lost their minds! It’s like a cult. And the outfits and dance moves are often beyond ridiculous.
These people are crazy- do they realize this is more like the pageant category than anything remotely athletic. I’m biting my tongue at these silly dance competitions—my daughter loves it- but as an educated normal working women- I am stressing to my daughter this is a fun activity to help learn dance for school dance team- but the makeup and outfits are just for fun and this is not a life time profession.
Our studio is pretty chill and outfits and moves appropriate- and they actually score well- although with 700 trophies doesn’t everyone???-but these little girs!! For real! And when your 8 year old is performing stripper moves, please use your head and talk to your dance teacher. No it’s actually not cute- it’s gross!
Signed- never be crazy dance mom.
And by the way, paying 500 dollars to compete means this is purely a business - not a true competition on skill.

No entry fees are $500.

Groups are in the $50.00 range. Solos are in the low $100 range.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

Well said.

I disagree with both of your flawed logic. Just because a sport is diverse and accepting, just because the young children themselves are having fun (because they're too young to realize how they look to the world), we should allow these kids to present themselves in a suggestive or sexual way, or at least in away that's not age-appropriate? Pardon me? You think that moral ambiguity can be compensated by other things?

No. That line of reasoning is flat out wrong, and it leads to unfortunate cases of abuse, like in Olympic gymnastics. "My child doesn't like her doctor but she's an Olympic gymnast so it's all good" kind of reasoning.

I think you need to stop being creepy and seeing children having fun as sexual in nature. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

Whatever- you’re crazy if this is your best example of diversity- though that wasn’t even my point- and there is much more diversity, if that is how you define dance being great, in basketball, football, etc.
However any size or shape can be a stripper so I guess if that’s important to you in this conversation, there you go.

Now back to my point- wearing fishnet and makeup and doing some of these moves is gross. Some dance technique is present- but that happens in the classroom not these goofy competitions.
Just wish it was less tacky and more athletic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meh. I don't have daughters but I have a son who is a competitive gymnast at gym with multiple dance and cheer teams. That means I have been to several dance and cheer competitions.

You know what I see? Dance and cheer is, hands down, the most diverse youth sport I've ever seen. They have more racial, body type, location, and socioeconomic diversity than any other sport my kids have ever done or that I have ever seen. The families are really nice, welcoming, and generally positive. The kids seem to be having a ball.

Yes there is a lot of sparkle and glitter and makeup. But these kids are having fun, in a positive environment.

Lighten up.

Whatever- you’re crazy if this is your best example of diversity- though that wasn’t even my point- and there is much more diversity, if that is how you define dance being great, in basketball, football, etc.
However any size or shape can be a stripper so I guess if that’s important to you in this conversation, there you go.

Now back to my point- wearing fishnet and makeup and doing some of these moves is gross. Some dance technique is present- but that happens in the classroom not these goofy competitions.
Just wish it was less tacky and more athletic.

There is absolutely far less diversity in football than dance/cheer. Only basketball comes close.

If you don't like it, don't do it, and stop been so creepy.