Police came saying they have a CPS report on me

[Anonymous]

So my son does counseling at school (which I basically requested). This morning his had a session. Then earlier tonight the police came to my door asking to talk to both of us separately and saying that they had a CPS report that I slapped him. I did give him a very light slap because he was aggravating me all morning, then his finger got pinched by his umbrella he was trying to take out of his backpack, he hurled it across the room and cursed like a sailor, so I lost it.
They told me it all looked fine to them and they see no reason for investigation. However I am shaken and had to tell my son it was not his fault, he thought they “stormed the house with their guns”. I said they take any talk about slapping seriously. He said he talked about it at the counselor. I told him not to talk about police visit at school and that whenever he mentions slapping they will have to investigate.
I understand the counselor had to report, but I think it made more harm than good and I don’t want him to go there anymore.
I admit to yelling and I slapped him a few times in his lifetime. But nothing like abuse.
I don’t want this to be blown out of proportion. But I am afraid if I pull him out the councelor will see it as me admitting guilt or trying to hide something. Yet I want to talk to her and tell her that we were both shaken.
Also, I got a call from a person with the same name as I and she told me they came to her and revealed it was a cps call about me (they confused us initially). I think this is a breach of privacy. I am just so mad.
What should I do?
Please don’t tell me to stop slapping, I know that, but yes I am human and sometimes I lose it. I will take a parenting class but what should I do re: counselor and breach of privacy?

[Anonymous]

Don't let him see the counselor anymore and get a family therapist. They have to report but usually a social worker not police investigate. This sounds a bit off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So my son does counseling at school (which I basically requested). This morning his had a session. Then earlier tonight the police came to my door asking to talk to both of us separately and saying that they had a CPS report that I slapped him. I did give him a very light slap because he was aggravating me all morning, then his finger got pinched by his umbrella he was trying to take out of his backpack, he hurled it across the room and cursed like a sailor, so I lost it.
They told me it all looked fine to them and they see no reason for investigation. However I am shaken and had to tell my son it was not his fault, he thought they “stormed the house with their guns”. I said they take any talk about slapping seriously. He said he talked about it at the counselor. I told him not to talk about police visit at school and that whenever he mentions slapping they will have to investigate.
I understand the counselor had to report, but I think it made more harm than good and I don’t want him to go there anymore.
I admit to yelling and I slapped him a few times in his lifetime. But nothing like abuse.
I don’t want this to be blown out of proportion. But I am afraid if I pull him out the councelor will see it as me admitting guilt or trying to hide something. Yet I want to talk to her and tell her that we were both shaken.
Also, I got a call from a person with the same name as I and she told me they came to her and revealed it was a cps call about me (they confused us initially). I think this is a breach of privacy. I am just so mad.
What should I do?
Please don’t tell me to stop slapping, I know that, but yes I am human and sometimes I lose it. I will take a parenting class but what should I do re: counselor and breach of privacy?

This is messed up. That counselor is not allowed to keep events like that private. It is called mandatory reporter or something like that. It also doesn't like she likes you and honestly, there is nothing you can do. What happens if you go in? Its going to go downhill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't let him see the counselor anymore and get a family therapist. They have to report but usually a social worker not police investigate. This sounds a bit off.

Wouldn’t it look suspicious if I don’t let him go to counseling? Like I am hiding something?
The officers told me they were asked by the CPS to investigate.

[Anonymous]

Maybe quit slapping your son!!! What the eff is wrong with you? You deserve this wake up call. Poor kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't let him see the counselor anymore and get a family therapist. They have to report but usually a social worker not police investigate. This sounds a bit off.

Wouldn’t it look suspicious if I don’t let him go to counseling? Like I am hiding something?
The officers told me they were asked by the CPS to investigate.

CPS investigates, not the police in less its a 911 call. Your story makes no sense. Officers can go with CPS but they don't generally do investigations. Stop hitting your kid.

[Anonymous]

I realize she had to report probably. My issues are: why did they come to someone with the same name initially?
And- I don’t want him to go there anymore. He can see a therapist with me from now on.

[Anonymous]

You shouldn’t be open hand slapping your kid. You need anger management or therapy to learn better ways to cope under stress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my son does counseling at school (which I basically requested). This morning his had a session. Then earlier tonight the police came to my door asking to talk to both of us separately and saying that they had a CPS report that I slapped him. I did give him a very light slap because he was aggravating me all morning, then his finger got pinched by his umbrella he was trying to take out of his backpack, he hurled it across the room and cursed like a sailor, so I lost it.
They told me it all looked fine to them and they see no reason for investigation. However I am shaken and had to tell my son it was not his fault, he thought they “stormed the house with their guns”. I said they take any talk about slapping seriously. He said he talked about it at the counselor. I told him not to talk about police visit at school and that whenever he mentions slapping they will have to investigate.
I understand the counselor had to report, but I think it made more harm than good and I don’t want him to go there anymore.
I admit to yelling and I slapped him a few times in his lifetime. But nothing like abuse.
I don’t want this to be blown out of proportion. But I am afraid if I pull him out the councelor will see it as me admitting guilt or trying to hide something. Yet I want to talk to her and tell her that we were both shaken.
Also, I got a call from a person with the same name as I and she told me they came to her and revealed it was a cps call about me (they confused us initially). I think this is a breach of privacy. I am just so mad.
What should I do?
Please don’t tell me to stop slapping, I know that, but yes I am human and sometimes I lose it. I will take a parenting class but what should I do re: counselor and breach of privacy?

This is messed up. That counselor is not allowed to keep events like that private. It is called mandatory reporter or something like that. It also doesn't like she likes you and honestly, there is nothing you can do. What happens if you go in? Its going to go downhill.

Counselor, all are mandated reporters and it was probably more than a light slap.

[Anonymous]

I understand you are shaken as it is was nerve wracking to have the police there. BUT

The system worked exactly as it should have. Your son should keep talking to the counsellor and he needs to tell her if he is being hit at home. If you can't control it, you need to get help for your anger issues. Your son needs the support. Don't take that away from him because you don't want the counsellor doing her job or any oversight of your actions.

I am not sure who called the wrong person? Is there a another parent at the school with an identical name? Was this someone you knew? I am not clear on the name confusion aspect.

[Anonymous]

Well it’s the police who came. I don’t know why.

[Anonymous]

CPS usually investigates but if there is a risk of violence and the CPS workers aren't sure what they are walking into, they may get the cops involved.

Your son should not go to therapy with you. He needs to be able to speak to someone without you there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand you are shaken as it is was nerve wracking to have the police there. BUT

The system worked exactly as it should have. Your son should keep talking to the counsellor and he needs to tell her if he is being hit at home. If you can't control it, you need to get help for your anger issues. Your son needs the support. Don't take that away from him because you don't want the counsellor doing her job or any oversight of your actions.

I am not sure who called the wrong person? Is there a another parent at the school with an identical name? Was this someone you knew? I am not clear on the name confusion aspect.

If I was abusing the kid why would I request counseling for him??
There is another person in the same town by the same name as me, and she called me and told me the police came to her first and told her as much as they had a cps call and my son’s name. Why would they do that???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand you are shaken as it is was nerve wracking to have the police there. BUT

The system worked exactly as it should have. Your son should keep talking to the counsellor and he needs to tell her if he is being hit at home. If you can't control it, you need to get help for your anger issues. Your son needs the support. Don't take that away from him because you don't want the counsellor doing her job or any oversight of your actions.

I am not sure who called the wrong person? Is there a another parent at the school with an identical name? Was this someone you knew? I am not clear on the name confusion aspect.

If I was abusing the kid why would I request counseling for him??
There is another person in the same town by the same name as me, and she called me and told me the police came to her first and told her as much as they had a cps call and my son’s name. Why would they do that???

Because you are hitting your kid!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand you are shaken as it is was nerve wracking to have the police there. BUT

The system worked exactly as it should have. Your son should keep talking to the counsellor and he needs to tell her if he is being hit at home. If you can't control it, you need to get help for your anger issues. Your son needs the support. Don't take that away from him because you don't want the counsellor doing her job or any oversight of your actions.

I am not sure who called the wrong person? Is there a another parent at the school with an identical name? Was this someone you knew? I am not clear on the name confusion aspect.

If I was abusing the kid why would I request counseling for him??
There is another person in the same town by the same name as me, and she called me and told me the police came to her first and told her as much as they had a cps call and my son’s name. Why would they do that???

Do you know this other person? How did she get your contact info to call you?

It sounds like a name mix up., The police likely looked up your name in their system and it gave them the other person first and they went there by mistake. I am not sure what checks and balances are meant to keep that from happening.