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Every time someone posts about any relationship struggle at all, the immediate answer is almost always divorce
Who are the people who always say this every time in every thread? Trolls? Unhappy divorced people who want others to share in their misery? Is divorce just truly not a big deal to some people on here (Certain cultures or classes?) Divorce is a big deal and can mess up many lives aside from just the couple involved. Don't get why people are so cavalier about suggesting it every time. |
| Life’s too short to be miserable or to put in unreciprocated effort. |
| To be fair, sometimes the answer is "have an affair with your neighbor - he could be your soul mate." |
| I feel like people are too quick to suggest open marriage which is probably 99% never an option. People act like its common or that there is a world of hot people willing to have sex with their "open" marriage self. Yeah right. |
+1M Nobody got time for that. |
Yep, this. You have one life to live. It should be lived in happiness and with people who love you. This is coming from someone who has been there and done that. Life is so much better single than with the wrong person. |
| As a man I am surprised at how bad some of these husbands are if the posters are to be believed. There’s also a lot of cheating. I was cheated on and tried to save my marriage and it didn’t work. So when I hear about lazy man-children or about cheating, my response is to divorce. My life Experience and that of observing good marriages in my family and circle of friends informs my decision. You can’t fix it when it’s really bad. When they say “marriage is work” it doesn’t mean constantly taking it on the chin. And being totally unhappy. |
| Because 50% of marriages end in divorce |
| People are projecting their own experiences onto the OP. They see something that reminds them of an unrepairable marriage that they were in or witnessed, and their brains make a leap to “I have been there...divorce now before things get worse!” |
LOL...right? I mean if only... Just hang up the "open marriage" shingle and the girls will come flocking? Nope. (It prob does work that way for women though. Because guys actually do fancy getting with a girl who isn't after him to get married! LOLZ) |
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Because back in the olden days - there was a terrible stigma to divorce.
People stayed in miserable marriages so that there children wouldn’t be ostracized in school since most kids came from homes where both parents were married. But these days, the stigma is no longer around & divorce is quite common these days. So when a poster posts of a lying/cheating/abusive spouse, they usually are advised to leave. Also for a spouse who doesn’t help out w/household tasks, childcare + so forth. Life is really too short and precious to live out your days in pure misery. We are all lucky if we get a full eighty years on this planet. Who wants to spend the majority of them wasted.....??! We all only get just one shot at life. Just ONE. It would be a travesty to waste it. |
I agree. I stayed in a bad marriage for years for my kids. When I finally pulled the plug my kids told me they are happy I finally left. Life is short. Everyone deserves to be happy while on this earth. No one knows what tomorrow will bring. |
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Well, some of us are old enough to remember when most women were trapped in marriage. With no education, no job, and so much social pressure to stay. In my mother’s generation, it was almost impossible for women to own property by themselves. That often meant being trapped with an adulterous husband, a drunk, a man who couldn’t hold a job, a man who abused her, or a man who abused the kids.
Divorce is the path to freedom from these hells that most women have had to put up with for most of human history. So it’s a valid option to save your own life. I’m not saying jump to divorce. But you gotta know this is one of the best tools out there for women. And it hasn’t always existed. Many countries still don’t allow divorce. You are still basically your husband’s property. |
...Because misery loves company, OP. |
| You clearly have not read every thread because many of them suggest counseling. |