Does a bad first year spell doom for your marriage ?
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Anonymous
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DH and I had a miserable first year with fights about everything.
Are we done? |
Anonymous
| My first year was bad. I wish we divorced. Now there are kids. It is almost 10 years later. Seriously, get out now. |
Anonymous
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It probably doesn't get easier.
Do you really want to spend the next 50 years of your life like that? |
Anonymous
| Were there unusual external stressors? Don’t have kids until it gets better, for sure. |
Anonymous
| Were you miserable before? What changed besides marital status? |
Anonymous
| Unless the fights were about specific life pressures that have been resolved (unemployment, illness, etc)... it's not going to change without a lot of work and will probably always be harder than it should be. |
Anonymous
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We had external stressors, so it wasn't easy. It got much better.
Are these fights that can easily be resolved or are they fundamental differences? Are they about something external that will fade? Maybe try counseling to see if these are make it or break it fights. Do not have kids yet. Wait until the marriage gets a little easier! |
Anonymous
| Here's one thing that won't make it better: having kids. My best friend was in a marriage of constant arguing and they decided to have a child because they thought that would help. Spoiler alert- it didn't. |
Anonymous
| Our first year was tough but our future is bright |
Anonymous
| Are you both the type to fight with other people? Is this a part of your personalities or do you just not get along with each other? |
Anonymous
| I will say this...every time I've seen a couple on Facebook write a 1 year anniversary post that alludes to their "ups and downs," that couple later divorces. |
Anonymous
| Did you live together first? Are there external stressors or is this a communication issue? What are your primary issues? |
Anonymous
yes, this. the writing's not necessarily on the wall, but success will require 100% effort on both of you. we had a rough start to marriage (our dating years were blissful), but now celebrating 9 years and it was all worth it. |
Anonymous
| Ours wasn't easy, and maybe it's not an ideal marriage, but 12 years and 2 kids later, and I think we're doing pretty well. |
Anonymous
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No. It means that you are immature idiots who are jockeying for power in the relationship. Stupid and short sighted but you can turn it around if you want to.
Quit it!! Treat each other with respect and love and like you are great friends. If you can’t get it together find a good counselor. |