Dog hates family member
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Anonymous
| My small dog (~20 lbs) admittedly has some serious issues regarding lunging and barking at strangers. We have had him since he was as a small puppy and this wasn’t a problem when we got him, so I can only imagine this was a failure on our part in training him. That being said, he generally has no issues with aggression inside the house/not on a leash. He is very nice to my immediate family, except for one family member. There is nothing that makes this person stand out (I.e. tall/large, wears hats, takes medications, is loud). Over the last 6 months or so, things have gotten increasingly bad with this one person to the point that we cannot have our dog home when this person comes over because he will try to attack them. It has slowly progressed to this point - when we first noticed dog got nervous around him, we had him do some commands with dog and give dog treats. Unfortunately the nerves have only gotten worse to the point where we are now. I mentioned the dog’s weight because given his size we are able to prevent a situation from turning dangerous, but it is beyond me what our small dog is trying to accomplish going after a person who has never done more than feed him treats. What gives? Has anyone had success in turning this sort of relationship around? The family member has been a good sport but this is obviously very uncomfortable and I don’t want to reinforce the dog going insane by putting them in a room together and seeing what would happen. |
Anonymous
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I would get a trainer in there to assess the situation.
Is the dog neutered? Could be a testosterone thing with another male. Does the relative have a hearing aid, or other apparatus that is actually making a high-pitched sound none of you can hear except the dog? |
Anonymous
| The dog goes, perhaps even put down. |
Anonymous
People before pets. |
Anonymous
Seconded. I would not even consider putting the dog down for this. There are other solutions. |
Anonymous
OP here. This is a person we see about once a month. I am not interested in immediately putting him down over isolated events with one person. Looking for more constructive feedback than just giving up. |
Anonymous
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I don’t know ‘what gives’ but I would not tolerate this behavior at all. Did you spoil this dog?
Anyway, I would have this person over, keeping the dog in a leash. As soon as any bad behavior develops I would pick up the dog, say no ! - and give the dog a timeout (kicked in the bathroom?). At least 5 minutes. Then try again- happens again? I’d give a longer timeout and make sure to be conking some lovely smelling meat that he’s not going to be receiving. Repeat until he knows how to act. If he never gets it - bye bye dog. I don’t care how ‘little ‘ he is - a dangerous dog is a dangerous dog. This dog needs to know that 1) you are 100 % in charge and 2) anything that he receives (food, shelter, love) is a privilege that can be taken away from him. |
Anonymous
| Crate the dog or keep them contained with baby gates while this particular person is visiting. And contact a behaviorist. |
Anonymous
| How was this not a problem before you got a dog? When you got him as a puppy? That makes no sense. Also, you need to take action to train your dog, imagine if I let my 70lbs dog act the same? Is thee a smell or something that would make this dog nervous around this person? Also, what do you mean can't have a dog at home when this person comes? Don't you have a bedroom with a door that you can put the dog in? |
Anonymous
| Is his name Puffy? |
Anonymous
|
OP we got a dog that is just nervous around some men. One is my DH (my sweet DH--there is NO reason to not like my DH).
He was doing a few things to set her off--he came in the side door, often surprising her with his presence, and doesn't take his shoes off right away, so he's loud, big and clunky compared to the rest of us. We discussed it with a trainer; she says dogs are often intimidated by men, many of whom are big, heavy, have that deep growly voice, and often have facial hair and generally are more bear-like than your average female or kid. Our dog loves cheese. So the trainer said, ok, from now on, only DH feeds her cheese. This is the program: What he does is watches TV or reads a magazine, and has a bowl of little pieces of cheese. *Without* looking at the dog, he tosses a piece of cheese at her. No eye contact. After a week or so of this, then brief eye contact--look at the dog, look away, toss the cheese. So this is because in dog-language, any stare or locked eye contact means some connection--in a non-scared dog, if they are just lying around, and you make eye contact, they will often get up and come over ('what do you want?'). But in this sort of relationship, the eye contact is seen as a potential threat and it scares them more. Anyways if DH calls the dog and if the dog skitters in the other direction, he should never follow. The dog must come to him on her own terms. And we've noticed she never will come when he calls her--it's only after he calls her and is NOT paying attention to her, then she'll creep up. DH also will walk the dog (I leash the dog and walk outside with them and hand the leash to him and off they go and all is fine. I don't have him try and leash her because that can evolve into that DH following dog with leash, dog skittering away...) I wonder if your male relative is trying too hard, crouched down with food, creeping toward the dog as the dog backs away; with people around, encouraging contact, "It's ok, Spot!". Just have your male relative ignore the dog, especially no eye contact, and throw it food every once and a while. So we have a very nice handyman-turned-friend. This guy is sweet but does not understand dog behavior and when he appears and the dog is barking at him, he just won't disengage, just keeps creeping toward her, crouched down, with a treat. No manner of explaining this to him seems to get it through his head that this is not good--coming onto her territory (our house) and coming after her with full eye contact, disregarding the fact that she is basically saying, "don't come closer" and getting more upset by the minute. Recipe for failure. She used to just be mildly afraid of him but now she just cannot stand him. |
Anonymous
Family member aside, what on earth makes you think lunging and barking at strangers is remotely acceptable? You need a solid trainer, or to put the dog down. This is not ok if the animal is ever outside your home/in public. |
Anonymous
| I had a pet that was aggressive towards me and loving towards my DH. I had to become the sole source of all care and interaction with that pet to change its behavior. It took a couple of years before isolated incidents would not arise. Visitors were hit or miss and there were always warning signs if you looked hard enough. Unless your family member wants to take the dog for a while, my experience won’t likely help you. You could be accidentally re-enforcing the behavior by making a big fuss over the visitor. Even the treat thing might raise the level of excitement past the point of positive influence. My only suggestion is either isolate the dog, run the dog just prior to visit, or have the family member run the dog. If you are not willing nor able to act on this, it might actually be best to put the dog down. You just will never be able to drop your guard. At any moment the dog may just suddenly pick a stranger as his target and then you won’t be prepared. Btw, did the dog just turn 2? This is common at that age. |
Anonymous
| Y'all who are saying to put the dog down because this behavior is unacceptable in a large dog are missing the point. OP's dog is less than 20 lbs. The rules really are different for small dogs. |
Anonymous
Your dog has had an immediate dislike for this person. When he/she comes over you should absolutely keep the dog away from him/her. Every time the dog has a negative response to the person it reinforces the problem. I would keep a definite eye on the dog to make sure that the dog isn't becoming aggressive towards other people. |