How do you afford private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We make $110K. I'm a SAHM who does temporary gigs of about $4K - 12K a year. Our 3 kids are in parochial school for about $15K total. We used our $3500 in stimulus bucks this year for part of the tuition.

Otherwise, we never travel by plane. Likely will never go to Disney or Europe. My husband drives my 12 year old car from college. We don't do extracurriculars outside of town rec league. Lots and lots of library books. Craigslist and facebook marketplace for new bikes, furniture, baby supplies.

We don't do financial aid because the amount of disclosure required is really uncomfortable.

We picked a semi rural part of New England to raise the kids. Who needs travel soccer when you can snow blow 4 months out of the year every Saturday morning?

If you don’t mind me asking, what type of side gigs do you do? Sahm here and so demoralized by not being able to contribute to income. I do all the childcare and cooking, cleaning, and yard work but would love to bring in some extra income.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure why people think private school should be affordable or are surprised that it's mainly the wealthy who attend. It's not easy pinning down specific numbers, but the MCPS budget/students works out to about $16K/student, and I suspect that DC, Fairfax, etc. are similar. Private schools, unless they are subsidized like some Catholic schools, are going to be more expensive to far more expensive than that. Even "affordable" privates can be $25K+/year, and that's a huge luxury even for those with high incomes if you have multiple kids. Everyone is already paying for public school in some fashion, and despite the DL debacles of the spring, the local systems are good to excellent. We're extremely fortunate to have had a high HHI for enough years to save for private so it doesn't affect retirement or college savings, but if we hadn't, we likely would have stayed in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Not to be mean, but you are only kidding yourself if you think private schools are populated by anything but a majority of wealthy families; whether self made or via grandparents. Of course there are some in low 6 figure income families making the stretch to cover tuition and other families who are receiving substantial FA (but still making major sacrifices to cover their portion of tuition), but the vast majority of families who choose private school (vs subsidized parochial/religious schools) fit the uber wealth model.

This- and when you see the college acceptance numbers, keep in mind that your schools applicants likely had full pay and legacy. If your kid doesn't those numbers are worthless to them in their situation (or actively hurt them if schools don't want too many kids from the same high school)

That's true for most private schools, but not all.

The high school I went to provides about 1% of Harvard's entering class each year. About 20% of the class goes to Ivies every year, and another 20-25% go to Ivy equivalent schools. That means a pretty high number of kids to each of those schools.

There are absolutely rich kids who go to that school, but lots of kids are on FA.

there are unicorn schools- if my kids wen to Groton, I'd expect Harvard. I don't think schools like that really exist in this area

PP here. No, they don't. I'm referring in my post to a NE prep school. I didn't go to an Ivy League school, but I also didn't apply to any. I got into both schools I applied to (one T10 and one T20). I went to the latter and found it exceptionally easy compared to high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why people think private school should be affordable or are surprised that it's mainly the wealthy who attend. It's not easy pinning down specific numbers, but the MCPS budget/students works out to about $16K/student, and I suspect that DC, Fairfax, etc. are similar. Private schools, unless they are subsidized like some Catholic schools, are going to be more expensive to far more expensive than that. Even "affordable" privates can be $25K+/year, and that's a huge luxury even for those with high incomes if you have multiple kids. Everyone is already paying for public school in some fashion, and despite the DL debacles of the spring, the local systems are good to excellent. We're extremely fortunate to have had a high HHI for enough years to save for private so it doesn't affect retirement or college savings, but if we hadn't, we likely would have stayed in public.

because people who make 300k think they're UMC and don't like finding out that there are things outside of their reach

[Anonymous]

Lower your COL for everything else. Buy houses in cheaper areas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lower your COL for everything else. Buy houses in cheaper areas.

This is true even if you have help from family. It's about setting priorities and planning.

It's not always worth it, either. It depends on the child and the goals for that child.

[Anonymous]

Single parent here making $150,000 a year. I save $26,000 a year for retirement (TPS) and pay $32,000 a year in rent (we're only here for three years -- I'm not buying!). I have $18K in CDs that I'll spend for next year's tuition; I also put away $250 per pay period and all my tax refund to tuition as well. Not going to lie, it's tight. But I want to go back in time and thank childfree me for socking $15K into CDs ten years ago when I didn't know what to do with the extra money.

[Anonymous]

We pay tuition ($35-$40K for one lower elementary school student) from our salaries (HHI is $500K+ before bonuses, which are an additional $150K+). We do have a younger child not yet in private school but currently pay for a full-time nanny, which is pricier than tuition.

[Anonymous]

We make 350K. We save a lot because of where we stay and our kids going to STEM programs in public schools. We live well on 150K. And while 350k is very comfortable and we save for our retirement and our kids, it is only comfortable if you live a middle class life style.

Yes we have maid service, lawn service, no food budget, foreign vacations, tutors, no debts and a nicely funded retirement...we are comfortable and careful with what we have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We make 350K. We save a lot because of where we stay and our kids going to STEM programs in public schools. We live well on 150K. And while 350k is very comfortable and we save for our retirement and our kids, it is only comfortable if you live a middle class life style.

Yes we have maid service, lawn service, no food budget, foreign vacations, tutors, no debts and a nicely funded retirement...we are comfortable and careful with what we have.

PP - I know this wasn't intended at all, but what you describe is not a middle class lifestyle, and $350K is not a middle class income. It's top 10% in the DC area, and much higher on a nationwide basis. It just shows how much the perspective is warped by our area.

[Anonymous]

I would say we have some Uber rich families and a bunch on assistance.

Most families seem to have Biglaw partners and associates, Doctors, CEO types and most families seem to fall between 300-600k range..

So at 400k, you would be ok. We are the 7 figure poster and when our son sees some families with huge homes, Ferrari’s, etc, he asks us why we don’t have these things. We just keep telling him how lucky he is and he is in a bubble....

[Anonymous]

Don't have more than two kids.

Also, it helps if your kids are the only grandkids. No way were my grandparents going to help with private school tuition--they had 20 grandkids. On the other hand, my kids are my parents' only grandchildren.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't have more than two kids.

Also, it helps if your kids are the only grandkids. No way were my grandparents going to help with private school tuition--they had 20 grandkids. On the other hand, my kids are my parents' only grandchildren.

Lol. yes. This helps if you can arrange it. My kids (3) are the only grandchildren on either side. No first cousins which is a major bummer but it means that tuition money comes their way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a low mortgage and very little credit card debt. Make about $300k. Have one in private and one in daycare. Altogether about $45,000 for both and will probably put the youngest in public school as we can see already he would do fine in public.

You make 300k and have credit card debt

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make 350K. We save a lot because of where we stay and our kids going to STEM programs in public schools. We live well on 150K. And while 350k is very comfortable and we save for our retirement and our kids, it is only comfortable if you live a middle class life style.

Yes we have maid service, lawn service, no food budget, foreign vacations, tutors, no debts and a nicely funded retirement...we are comfortable and careful with what we have.

PP - I know this wasn't intended at all, but what you describe is not a middle class lifestyle, and $350K is not a middle class income. It's top 10% in the DC area, and much higher on a nationwide basis. It just shows how much the perspective is warped by our area.

She also doesn’t have a kid in private school for $40k each per year. So it’s more irrelevant than not.